


Unlike It Was Before

by LeoNita



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2003)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse, M/M, Multi, SAINW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-27
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2018-05-09 15:26:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 30
Words: 70,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5545133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeoNita/pseuds/LeoNita
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Unlike it was Before<br/>(On going)</p><p>Just because the Shredder is dead, doesn't mean its all over.</p><p>Writers: NuoNos and LeoNita<br/>Written As: Roleplay<br/>Series: 2k3/2k7<br/>Pairing: OT4<br/>Rated: NC-17, TCest, TSlash<br/>Type: Multichapter<br/>Warning: Non-con/Rape, Character Death, Mental Health Issues, Suicide, Alcohol Abuse, Gore and Violence.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> NuoNos: I am VERY dyslexic, so please ignore any misspelling or grammatical issues. All work has been checked but things slip by. Once work is posted, I tend not to edit as I am too busy. Any comments regarding spelling and grammar corrections will be ignored, without meaning any offense.

Mikey grunted, waking up. That alone was a miracle. He should be dead. "Hey..? Anyone else..?" Mikey forced himself to sit up and open his eyes fully. Once they cleared he could see that he wasn't the only one propped up and bandaged. "Raph! LEO!"

"They're ok, Mikey. Just unconscious" The familiar female voice got Mikey's attention. Before his blurry eyes stood April, also wearing bandages and clean clothes.

"April.." He pushed himself forwards and wrapped his arm around his human friend. "Is he.. is he dead? Is the Shredder really gone?"

April nodded, a smile decorating her features. "Yes. The nightmare is over, Mike. We won"

Mikey sniffed, but then found he couldn't hold back the torrent of tears that streamed down his face. "Oh s-shell.. oh god.. I ... I n-never.." He sobbed.

The red headed woman leaned over to wrap her arms around her friend. Every muscle in her body ached and she felt like screaming in pain when Mikey pressed her closer to himself but he needed her, he needed this.

"It's alright, let it all out"

Mikey did. He hadn't been able to cry since Donnie left and this whole thing had started but now.. he couldn't stop.

"Mikey.." Raph groaned. "Stop crying! I'm trying to sleep."

"Good to see you're alive too, big guy." April chuckled.

Raph opened his eye and looked around. "Wait.." He sat up. "We faced the Shredder and we're alive?"

"Donnie killed Shredder!" Mikey said, trying to calm himself as he rested back down.

Raph smiled sadly. "Seems like we really were useless without him."

"Don't talk like that. If Don had to face him alone he would've died. He needed his brothers, he needed his team" April replied.

Mikey wiped his eyes. "April's right. We were a team and thats why we won."

Raph smiled a little. "Yeah, your right. Donnie was always best at making us a team."

"Raphael, I do appreciate what Donatello... that Donatello... did for us but would you stop saying it like you guys didn't do shit, please?"

Raph looked at April. "Alright Ap... I'll try. But its hard. I still know it was my fault.."

"We can discuss that later. We need to get you to a safe place" April said, standing up. "Shredder and Karai might be gone but there are still Foot Bots and patrol units outside"

Raph forced himself up. He then helped Mikey up. He could seen Leo was still out of it. He hesitated for a moment before picking up the 'leader' and letting him piggy back

April looked back when she heard a groan coming from behind Raph. Leo wasn't waking up but at least he was still alive. The fight had taken a toll on everyone but considering Leo's years of struggle inside the lair, it was obvious he was the most tired of the bunch.

The rebel leader waited until the last of the patrol units left and signaled the others to follow her to the next secret passage.

Once they reached their secret base, Raph rested Leo down on the bed. "Easy Leo.." He started to clean Leo's face. The leader had a fever. After all, this was the secound time he had been stabbed by Karai

"That might be infected. I'll bring Dr. Hanson to check him up" April patted Leo's arm. " Hang on, Leo"

Raph nodded. He was gonna leave but changed his mind. He sat down beside Leo. "Hey.. I remember last time this happens we talk about stories of when we were younger. Now.. I just wanna say I'm sorry.."

A harsh coughing fit shook Leo's body awake but barely. His fever and sore body wouldn't let him move too much. He could only manage to lift his hand where his partially blind eyes let him know was Raph's scarred cheek.

"... y...you...called... for ...m...e..." He said forcing the words out despite his pain.

"Shh... don't talk.. just.. just get better. Please.." Raph said, stroking Leo's hand. "I'm right here."

Leo nodded weakly. He turned to look at Mikey who knelt by his left side and tried to reach his hand. Mikey gripped it. "We did it bro. Shredder and Karai are gone. We just need to clean up the city now."

"Good..." Leo whispered. "... Donnie?"

"April said he vanished again.." Mikey said. "I think he got pulled back into his time/dimension.."

The news didn't surprise Leo, if something he was glad that other Don wasn't trapped in this hellish world even after Shredder's defeat.

Raph rested back in his chair. He pulled out a cigarette and began to smoke. He let out a puff and then licked his lips. "So what now?"

"I guess we clean up the rest of the mess. Or help to." Mikey said.

"And after that?" Raph asked.

Mikey turned to Leo for answers but the ex-leader had surrendered to sleep still gripping his hand.

Raph smirked a little. "I like the answer." He said, meaning finally resting. "You know.. they humans probably know about us now. There was enough warning posters everywhere."

"We've helped more people than those we've killed. And those were just Foot soldiers, I don't think humans have time to start a witch hunt in times like this" Mikey said.

"Yeah.. I hope so.." Raph said, putting out his cig stub. "Maybe we could move up to the farmhouse if its still sorta intact."

Mikey's gaze lowered. "Too many memories... I'm not sure if I want to see... him again..."

If Leo was awake he would've told Raph about the weird visions and night terrors that made Mikey's sleep impossible and unbearable. Sometimes he saw Donatello... their good old Donatello... it felt so real it was scary.

Raph grunted, not understanding and not bothering to. "Sure. Whatever." He looked at his brother. "You know.. they'll be lots of robotics hanging around. We might be able to find you an arm. After all, the utroms will be unslaved now too."

"Why, I thought you liked my new style" Mikey joked weakly. "Last time you were with me, you didn't seem to mind"  
Raph smiled. "Of course I don't. I just know if i could have my other eye back I would."

"I don't know, you look pretty good to me too. Gives you a perfect bad boy image. I'm sure the ladies will dig that"

"What ladies." Raph grunted. "All the girls that liked us are dead."

"It's a new world, sort of. I'm sure you'll find someone... that is if Leo lets you"

"Whats that supposed to mean?"

Mikey shrugged and stayed silent. If Leo hadn't told him then why should he play messenger? April brought the doctor she promised and he began to check on Leo. Lucky for him, the wound wasn't as infected as he feared and he would only need to rest and some painkillers and antibiotics.

Raph didn't leave Leo's side the whole time. He just occasionally stroked Leo's head as he slept.

When April was done checking on her rebels, she went to see how the turtles were doing. Mikey was starting to fall asleep and Raph was in the same position where she'd left him, beside Leonardo. It brought a bit of joy to her heart to see the brothers together but it was hard to say if things would ever be the same .

"Well, I guess I should check how's Angel doing. You guys are going to be ok?"

Raph grunted. "Yeah. Just trying to work out what the next stage of the plan should be. To be honest, I've never thought this far ahead." He looked up at April. "Do you think the enslaved Utroms will help us out? I mean, a kinda you-scratch-my-back-and-I'll-scratch-yours form of recovery."

"Hmm... I don't know. I mean if Mortu is still alive he might convince the others to join us"

"I can see Shredder keeping Mortu alive to taunt him." Raph said. "So.. I'm guessing the next stage is raiding Shredder's tower."

"First things first, tough guy. You guys need to heal" April said, patting Raph's shell. "I'll talk to Angel. Now that Shredder's gone I guess it'll be easier to get tech and weapons and I'm pretty sure the western side will be planning to raid Saki's tower as soon as possible"

"Yeah." Raph nodded. "We need to get in there before they get all the good stuff." He chuckled.

"Perhaps Mike can give me a hand with that. You have to stay here with Leo in case he wakes up. But for now, you guys take it easy. I'll be right back"

Raph nodded. He had taken more damage than he'd like to admit.

Mikey yawned widely, sitting up. "Sure, I'll come with you. It was getting boring around here anyway." He stood and followed April.

Things in the underground base weren't as silent as Raph thought they would be. People were celebrating Shredder's defeat, others were planning their next move and some were packing their belongings to leave that place for good and try to find the places they used to call home. A couple of humans Raph had befriended over the years had come to check on him and Leo. They exchanged pleasantries and a few words before the brothers were left alone again.

Raph sighed and looked at his older brother. For the billionth time he wished Donnie was here. He knew everything would have been better if Donnie was around. He would had been able to help stop Leo's eyesight from becoming worse. He could have given Mikey a robotic arm.

Raph touched his eye socket. Maybe Donnie could have even done something about that..

"You're thinking about him again..." A rough voice startled Raph. Leo had woken up looking a little rested.

Raph grunted and turned away a little. "Yeah? Well, who doesn't think about him."

"... I didn't... until that other Don showed up, that is"

"Yeah. I hope he made it back home alright so his brothers don't have to go through what we did." Raph said. He then looked to Leo. "How are you feeling now?

"Like shit" Leo chuckled.

"So, pretty normal then." Raph joke.

"Haha, listen to the funny mutant"

Raph actually smiled a little at that. He grabbed a water bottle and offered it to Leo. "Thirsty?"

Leo gladly accepted the bottle and took a long swig. "God... it's been a while since I had fresh water..."

"Yeah, same here." Raph looked around the small room. "So, the next stage seems to be raiding Shredder's tower and looking of Mortu."

"Sounds like fun" Leo said sarcastically.

"April, Angel and Mikey are getting a head start on that." Raph said. "We're supposed to heal. You more than me."

"I'm alright." Leo sat up, wincing thanks to his aching joints. "We can get moving now"

Raph pushed him down with minimal strength. Leo flopped onto his shell. "Yeah, you an't going nowhere.

Leo frowned. "And YOU are?"

"Why? Would ya get lonely without me?" Raph teased

"Maybe?" Leo teased back.

Raph looked away, hiding his blush. He grabbed Leo's hand. "Yeah, okay, I'll stay."

"... you called for me..." Leo said, tightening his hold on Raph's hand. "When I thought I was dying, I heard you calling for me... why?"

"Because despite everything that happened between us I-" His grip on Leo's hand tightened. "-I still care about you!"

"Hmm... thanks..."

Raph let go on Leo's hand and rested back in his chair. "You know.. cause your my brother and all."

"It's that what you said to Mikey before you fucked him or you really mean it this time?" Leo asked bitterly. He wanted to believe him, he really did. But it would take a while before Leo could call Raph that way.

Raph looked at Leo in shock at first, then growled. "Fuck you Leo!" He stood. "Here I am trying be nice and thats what you have to say?! You're such a fucking dick sometimes."

"I knew you hadn't changed a bit." Leo said calmly but feeling horrible on the inside. He struggled to get on his feet, the urge to run out of that room becoming stronger.

Raph force Leo back down. "Don't bother, I'll leave-" Raph turned and slammed the door as he left.

It wasn't the first time Raph had done this, back in the good old teenage years he'd done it a lot. But the last time he'd seen him slamming the door it was also the last time he left the lair and never came back. That's why it hurt so much even after 30 years.

Perhaps he should've kept his mouth shut, now and 30 ago, maybe that way Don would still be with them... maybe that way he would've told Raph...

The ex-leader sighed loudly and rested on his side. No, it was too late for that now.

"... I'm sorry..." He whispered to no one in particular before drifting off to sleep, to meet with his demons once again.

\----

Angel lock and loaded. "Man, I really hope Murto's alive."

"You and me both" April said, fastening her belt. "Do we have everything we need?"

"I double checked the amo. We should be good to go" Mikey said.

However, when the group entered the tower they were surprised to see that all of the Karai-bots and other defenses were deactivated.

"What...?" Angel said, looking around. "Did someone get here before us?"

"No.." Chaplin said, stepping out from the shadows. "You're the first."

Angel aimed. "Chaplin! Give me one good reason why I should shoot you right now."

"Do it." Chaplin said to their surprise. "Do it and I can be with my Kunoichi Queen once again!"

"Hold on, Angel" Mikey stepped in. "... I thought she ditched you and sent you to the mines. Why would you want to die for her?"

"Because I loved her." Chaplin said.

Angel winced. "Yeaaahh, I don't think that was love."

"Chaplin, I know it's hard to lose someone you love. Believe me, when I lost my husband I thought I was better off dead." April said. "You're a great mind and obviously Karai couldn't see that."

"We could use a brain like yours in the new New York" Mikey continued. "So please, reconsider. We can help you, Chaplin."

Chaplin hesitated. He then nodded. He remembered how when he was growing up he wanted to help the world. He could now. "Okay, okay, I'll help."

"Good. Now, we're looking for Shredder's most important prisoners. Have you heard of the name Mortu?" Mikey asked.

Chaplin nodded. "I know where he is." He indicated his head. "Come follow."

Chaplin lead the little team safely all the way up to the top of the tower. Inside a large status tube with Mortu in it.

April winced when he saw him, Shredder had made quite a number on Mortu. "Is he...?"

"He's alive." Chaplin dashed over. He began to check over it. "He just needs those worm things to heal him." He pressed a button and the warms filled the tank- beginning to repair Mortu's body.

"Ugh... no matter how many times I saw this in the past, it still freaks me out." Mikey shivered.

"Me too." Angle said. She began to looked around. "There's a lot of rooms. Shredder had this place seriously kitted out."

"Angel, you and I should check out if there's someone else who needs rescuing." April said. "You two stay here."

"Aye aye, Captain!" Mikey chuckled. His first sort-of joke in a while.

Angel smiled when she heard it. She skipped off to joining April.

"I.. I heard Donatello killed Shredder." Chaplin said

"Yeah but that wasn't our Don." Mikey said. "Long story."

Chaplin looked at the ground. "Despite us being on other sides, I always respected Donatello's intellect."

"He did try to convince us to not kick your ass so hard. Didn't want to damage that brain of yours." Mikey joked.

Chaplin smiled a little. "I am very thankful for that. I'll try and be the scientist he would want me to be."

"So... you haven't see him either, huh... well, at least now I know Shredder didn't have him" Mikey pondered.

Chaplin shook his head. "Shredder never had him. Didn't stop him looking for him though. Shredder knew that having Donatello under his control would have made him must stronger. The Shredder was convinced Donatello was still alive."

Mikey nodded in acknowledgement. "That's good, I guess... wish he would've just come back."

"Hey! Guys! We found Shredder's food storage!" Angel said excitedly.

Mikey patted Chaplin's back. "C'mon, let's help the girls. In the meantime we can rant all we want about how pathetic our lives have been."


	2. Chapter 2

    

Raph stood in the hallway, smoking. He he come back to check on Leo but hadn't summoned the courage to open the door. So here he was, burning through a whole pack of smokes.  
  
"Something's worrying you."   
  
A voice said. Raph immediately recognized it as Ted's, one of Angel's newest boyfriends after the previous three were executed after being captured. Raph jerked his head up to look at the human. Raph both hated and liked Ted. Ted was a great guy, but he looked a lot like Casey in dim lights.  
  
"Kid, I thought I told you to cut your hair." Raph grunted  
  
"No can do, man. Angel likes it this way." Ted chuckled. "Now spill. What's bugging you?"  
  
Raph screwed up his face. Ted knew he was one of the few who could get Raph to talk. "So, like, Shredder's gone. You'd think Leo wouldn't be so much of a jackass now."  
  
“I thought that was his special ability or something." Ted teased.  
  
Raph smirked. "Yeah. Leo used 'Jackass'. It's super effective."  
  
"Hey, Sarah was asking about you again. I think she wants a one night stand or something"  
  
Raph snorted. "She always wants the D." He took a drag from his cigarette. "Can't blame her though. Its one of the few good things in live right now."  
  
"You think Mike will mind?"  
  
"Dunno." Raph said. "Does it really matter?" He put out his cig.  
  
Ted hummed. "... you do care about their feelings, Raph. They ain't like those easy floozies and you know it"  
  
"You're lucky I like ya kid. Or I'd punch ya in the face for that." Raph said.  
  
"You know I'm right, though" Ted said. "Anyway, I just wanted to check how you're doing... I should go wait for Angel or something."  
  
"I heard they went to Shredder's tower. Have then called in yet?" Raph asked  
  
Ted shook his head. "Nah but I'm sure they're ok."  
  
Raph grunted. "Then scram kid."  
  
"Sir, yes sir" Ted did a mocking salute and turned on his steps.  
  
Raph watched him go. Raph sighed, deciding to finally check on Leo. He knocked on the door. "Leo? You okay?"  
  
No answer. Either Leo was brooding, ignoring him or he was still asleep.  
  
Raph opened the door and stepped in. "Leo?"  
  
The bed was made and the window was open. Leo had left... again.  
  
Raph slammed his fist against the wall. "Fuck-!" His began to feel his anger bubbled again. "Why does he always run away?!"  
  
Raph turned, slamming the door shut and he stomped out of the room. He resisted the urge to lay on the bed and smell Leo's fresh scent. He had better things to do. Raph stomped over to Ted, grabbing him by the back of the shirt and dragging him.  
  
"So, I'm guessing the reunion didn't go well?" Ted said letting Raph drag him.  
  
"Leo's a fucking dick-head." Raph growled. "He didn't even say goodbye. He didn't even give me a fucking chance."  
  
"Oh, he left. Classical Leonardo" Ted shook his head, grinning like an idiot. "Although it might have something to do with his guilt complex you know? Angel's told me about it and if my studies in psychology serve me well, I'd say this is his way of coping. Not a healthy one, if you ask me"  
  
"Nobody fucking asked you." Raph said. He grabbed a pack of beers from the store room and headed to the roof. Since all of Shredder's bots were walking around without orders, it was relatively safe to drink on the roof of the compound.  
  
"And now we are witnessing Raphael's coping methods" Ted continued. "Man, I should've brought my recorder"  
  
"Just shut up and drink with me." Raph said, downing the first can.  
  
Ted shrugged and downed a can- or so Raph thought. Someone needed to be sober so Ted pretended to drink as he always did whenever Raph wanted to get wasted. "I didn't want to say this but I heard you guys talking. It was a pretty dick move getting Mikey involved, I admit"  
  
Raph was already half way through his second. "Y-yeah.. I don't wanna think I'm stringing Mikey along. Mikey's free to do whatever."  
  
Ted nodded. "However, he keeps coming back to you. Why is that?"  
  
"Dunno, maybe he just wants to feel close to us. I know he fucks Leo too." Raph grunted.  
  
"Always a free spirit... but he's still bound. Bound to you, to Leo, to what's left of his family." Ted said. "And he doesn't want to lose that. That's why he keeps coming back but he's using the wrong tactic"  
  
Raph nodded. "I guess. I'm hurt him so much I just.. try and make him feel good when he comes to me."  
  
"By using sex as a coping method." Ted added. "It's not bad but it's not good either. Someday Mike is going to realize he hasn't accomplished anything and he'll stop coming."  
  
Raph crushed the empty can in his hand. He thought about yelling at Ted for that, but he knew the human was right. He said nothing has he downed the next couple of cans.  
  
"You have the chance to make things right, Raph. With Mikey and with Leo, even though he's still the same jackass you knew 30 years ago. With Mikey, things are already fucked but there's a way you can turn that for the better. With Leo? Well... give him some slack and then reel him in"  
  
"Oh yeah? What to ya suggest, Mr Psychologist." Raph said, his words slurring a little.  
  
"If Leo wants to play cat, let him be cat" Ted shrugged. "They eventually have to come back home for pets and food"  
  
"And Mikey?" Raph said, downing the rest of the can.  
  
"You know how he comes and let you fuck him? Next time, don't fuck him. Make him feel special, do something you two used to like when things weren't shitty."  
  
"Okay.." Raph said. "That actually sounds like a really good idea." Raph opened the last beer. He had been drinking so fast he was getting more drunk by the moment.  
  
"... feeling better?"  
  
Raph nodded, feeling numb and dizzy. He threw the last empty can to the side and flopped onto his shell. "I hope.. t-that Donnie.. t-the Donnie that helped us.. i-is back with his family..."  
  
Ted patted his shell. "I'm sure he is."  
  
"Do you.. do you think that.. the world will get going again? I k-know it'll never be normal but.." Raph slurred.  
  
"Let's put it this way, you guys have more allies than enemies now. Half the world knows you risked your lives for humanity... I don't see why you shouldn't have a decent life"  
  
Raph smiled. "T-that.. w-would be amazing. I d-didn't think about people knowing us now.."  
  
"Seriously? You guys kicked ass and you think people ain't gonna know about that?" Ted chuckled.  
  
Raph snorted. "We saved the world many times and people didn't know.  
  
"Now they do. And if they don't, then they will know. We'll make sure of that"  
  
Raph rested his head back, staring at the stairs. "All our lives we've been fighting the Shredder. Now he's dead.. what is there to do.."  
  
Ted sighed. "For starters, you could join Angel's vigilantes. There's still Foot scum out there"  
  
"Yeah, I could. Although a break sounds nice.." Raph close his eyes, his vision spinning.  
  
Ted chuckled. "Come, it'll get really cold in a few hours. Let's head inside" Raph semi-struggled against Ted as he forced Raph to stand. He gave in after a moment or two, completely and utterly drunk.  
  
\----  
  
Raph had a wonderful dream. He dreamt he had his head resting in Donnie's lap. Donnie was reading some science book but that didn't matter. He could smell Donnie's soft scent and it claimed him. He jerked awake unwillingly. No, he couldn't take torture like that. He refused to. He couldn't want what he couldn't have or it would drive him crazy.  
  
"That dream again?" This time, it was Mikey who came to check up on him.  
  
Raph looked away. "Y-yeah.." He rubbed his face. "I feel like shit. I drank too much.. again.."  
  
Mikey scoffed. "Figures. Ted told me we're one turtle short again"  
  
"Yeah.." Raph sat up fully. "Fucking dick."  
  
"I can't blame him, though. I was getting tired of pity fucks so..."  
  
Mikey sighed deeply. He couldn't be mad at Leo or Raph. Of course he was hurt but what choice did he have but love them in the only way he thought they wanted.  
  
Raph remembered the conversation with Ted. He stood up and walked over to Mikey. He hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry Mikey. I never wanted you to feel that way."  
  
Mikey stiffened for a moment; in all those years he'd never been hugged let alone by Raph of all people, not even when they fucked. This was all new yet familiar to him, eventually he hugged him back.  
  
"Mikey, I promise I'll be a better brother. J-just give me a chance." He chuckled. "Although I might screw up a few times. I really want us to be a family again."  
  
Mikey pulled away a little, not wanting to leave that comforting warmth but needing to see if his brother was being truly honest.   
  
"You mean it?"  
  
Raph nodded. "Yes."   
  
And Mikey could tell he was telling the truth. He allowed himself to smile a little. "Alright..."  
  
“Great… just... give me some wiggle room. After all, I've been a jerk for so long."  
  
Mikey smirked. “If you weren't then I wouldn't love you as much, Raphie"  
  
Raph smiled then. "Hey, wanna bake a cake like we used to? I think we have supplies for that."  
  
"Uh... but you hate cooking"  
  
"Yeah, but I love cake." Raph snorted. "What do you say?"  
  
"... you... you don't want to... y-you know..." Mikey blushed, finding it hard to say that out loud.  
  
"No." Raph smiled. "I really do wanna make cake with you. Like brothers."  
  
Mikey's smiled widened and there was a little sparkle in his eyes that had been ignited by such simple words. "T-then what are we waiting for!"  
  
Raph grinned. He followed Mikey into the store room and took what mikey picked out to use. "Should it be HUGE?" Raph said. "After all, you can make the best cakes and everyone will want some."  
  
"Definitely. Oh and we gotta make cupcakes for the kids, this will be the first time they'll have fresh ones!"  
  
Raph grinned. "Oh! That's a great idea." He carried all the ingredients into the kitchen. They had gotten so much food from the Shredder's tower.  
  
Hours later a group of kids had gathered in the kitchen to watch and help with the cake and cupcakes.   
  
"Who would've thought you'd be great with kids, Raph."  
  
"Hey, I helped raise Shadow." Raph chuckled. "I think I did a good job with her." He helped one of the kids with mixing.  
  
"Yeah well, I don't think April was happy when she decided she wanted a bike just like her uncle."  
  
Raph snorted. "I can't help it if the girl has good taste in transportation."  
  
"... I miss her..."  
  
Raph's hand tightened on the wooden spoon. "She went off to find Donnie... It.. it was my fault.."  
  
Mikey helped one of the kids down and gave him a cookie before walking over to Raph. "Hey, it was nobody's fault. She had her father's spirit and she loved Donnie just like everyone else"  
  
Raph crossed his arms. "Y-yeah." He sighed. "I still feel as if both of them are alive.."  
  
"No kidding. Are we sure that Ted dude ain't one of Casey's new lives or something?" Mikey joked.  
  
Raph smiled sadly. "It would be nice.."  
  
"Ok, enough sad stuff. These kids need sweets, stat!"  
  
Raph chuckled and helped Mikey as best he could. For a few hours it felt like nothing bad had ever happened between them  
  
Once the kids were fed and the kitchen was cleaned, Mikey guided Raph to his room since he'd turned his red mask into a blindfold.   
  
"C'mon Raph, I promise it's not a prank. I'm too old for that anyway"  
  
Raph smirked. "Suure you are." He teased, but allowed Mikey to guide him anyway.  
  
"Ok... just a few more steps. Watch out for the pipe-"  
  
Raph nearly stumbled into the pipe. He clung onto Mikey's hand  
  
"-told you to watch out" Mikey chuckled.  
  
“Very funny-" Raph said, chuckling too though. He felt Mikey stop. "Can I take off the blindfold now?"  
  
"Yup! We're here"  
  
Raph removed his blindfold, unsure what to expect  
  
"Take a sit" Mikey said signaling the mattress on the floor. "I have to show you something"  
Raph did so. He sat down on the mattress. Mikey moved some loose bricks from the wall and pulled out a box of considerable size. It still amazed Raph how could Mikey do all that with just one hand.  
  
"Believe it or not, after the lair was destroyed I went down there every day if I could and ... brought some stuff..."  
  
Raph pushed himself up a little to try and peer into the box. Mikey sat beside him and put the box between them. "Go ahead..."  
  
Raph began to search through stuff. It was mostly photograph, little trinkets.. and one of Donnie's bandanas-  
  
Raph held it in his fingers, feeling his eye brim with tears.  
  
"... I know you'll never love me like you loved him" Mikey said. "But at least I tried..."  
  
Raph sniffed and wiped his eye. "I love you in a different way Mikey.. I just.." He held it closer to him. "I know all of this is my fault. If I had been honest.. he wouldn't have run off.."  
"It wasn't your fault, Raph. Wasn't Leo's or father's" Mikey replied calmly. "Maybe it was my fault. You know... for being a stupid flirt..."  
  
Raph shook his head. "I.. I don't blame you. He was irresistible.."  
  
"He wasn't my target. Well, not the main one" Mikey smiled sadly, looking at Raph.  
  
Raph looked down. "Why? I ain't any sorta special 'catch'."  
  
Mikey chuckled. "Of course you are, silly. Do you think after 30 years I'd stop trying if you weren't my type?"  
  
Raph blushed and grunted a little. He rubbed his neck. "I a-always thought you were too good for me. Donnie definitely was."  
  
"Oh, so you did love me~" Mikey teased. "My, oh my! I'm blushing"  
  
"Of course I loved ya knuckle head." Raph scratched his snout. "I kinda hoped that.. Donnie, you and I could have been a threesome. Leo too if he wasn't such a dick."  
  
"Who knows, Chaplin did say Shredder thought Don was still alive" Mikey shrugged. "Maybe, just maybe, he's out there somewhere"  
  
"M-Mikey.. don't.. don't do that to me.." Raph said, shaking.  
  
Mikey didn't think he'd ever have to do this but he had no choice. He would always be the stress relief toy. "... would it help if I used his mask...?"  
  
Raph looked up. He shook his head. "No. No I dont want you to degrade yourself like that. Ever."  
  
Mikey nodded, feeling utterly embarrassed. "... ok. I guess I should let you sleep now"  
  
Raph retched a hand up and pulled Mikey down with him. He put his arm round Mikey. "Sleep with me. I mean, not sexual-like. I mean just.."  
  
"You never just want to sleep, Raph." Mikey said.  
  
"Give me the benefit of the doubt?" Raph asked  
  
"... you'll be thinking about Donnie... like always" The youngest replied bitterly.   
  
Raph sighed a little. But he remembered Ted's words. It was gonna take a while. "Mikey, I'm gonna sleep on roof tonight, under the stars. You can join me or not, It's up to you."  
  
"You'll get cold... and I never liked sleeping alone..." Mikey admitted sheepishly.  
  
Raph smirked. "Seems like you're stuck here." He pulled and blanket over them.  
  
Mikey curled up against Raph's side, his head resting on his arm. The smell of cigarettes and alcohol lingered on his jacket, very Raph-like. He sighed happily and smiled. For the first time in 30 years he'd have a good night's sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Mikey was shocked to find when he woke up, a piping hot breakfast was next to him. On his otherside Raph was eating his own.  
  
"... uh... good morning?"  
  
"Mornin'." Raph said, shoveling food into his face.  
  
Mikey looked at his breakfast in surprise. "... you did this for me?"  
  
"Yeah, so make sure it don't get cold." Raph said  
  
Mikey smiled at him. "Thanks... this is really sweet."  
  
"Don't mention it." Raph said. He downed his glass of orange juice.  
  
Mikey didn't say more and started to eat in silence. He knew Raph always hated to be thanked for stuff so this was as good as it could get.  
  
Raph finished and laid back down. "What do you wanna do today?"  
  
"Well, we have a lot of stuff to do here. Replace amo, check the weapons, free more prisoners..."  
  
"Sounds like a full day." Raph smiled. "At least we don't have to do it with the Shredder and Karai looming over us. You said Chaplin's working to deactivate all droids."  
  
"He was last time I checked up on him." Mikey said. "April must have told him to take a break though."  
  
Raph nodded. "Yeah.." He rubbed his face. "Personally I'm looking forwards to getting rid of those droids that look like helpless little girls. They fool me nearly every time."  
  
"You were always a softie, Raph"  
  
"H-hey.. its not my fault they look so life like."  
  
"Sure, sure. C'mon, let's take a shower"  
  
Raph picked up all the empty plates and carried them into the kitchen before heading to the bathroom and the communal showers.  
  
"Morning..." Leo's voice came from the doorway much to Raph's surprise.  
  
Raph nearly had a heart attack. "H-hey." He turned to look at Leo. "Came back did ya?"  
  
"I never left. I was helping out the seniors on the lower levels" Leo said, undressing himself. "Figured they would need a hand with the extra supplies"  
  
Raph knew Leo was lying, but he let it slide. "Me and Mike made cake for everyone. Did ya get any?"  
  
"Never liked sweets."  
  
"Yeah, you're more of a green tea kinda turtle." Raph mumbled. He stripped off completely and began to shower.  
  
Leo never saw that well during the night but during the day he was completely blind. He used his hands to guide himself to the nearest stall. With his back to Raph, the latter could see clearly the damage done to Leo's shell and body.  
  
Raph couldn't look away. He looked at it sadly at all the marks. "Leo.. are.. are you in any pain?"  
  
Leo shook his head. "Angel did all she could after the explosion. I know I lost most of my shell and yes, it hurt for a while but I manage..."  
  
"If it does ever hurt, say something."  
  
Leo scoffed. "Sure, whatever you say..."  
  
Raph turned away at last. He carefully touched the eyelid of his empty socket. It hurt all the time.  
  
Leo shivered when the cold water hit his shell or what was left of it. Now he was exposed to the elements, he was more vulnerable to catch infections and strong winds resulted in very bad colds or extreme fevers that for some reason hadn't killed him yet.  
  
Raph turned his head. "Is it too cold?"  
  
Stubbornly, Leo forced himself to stop shivering. "No"  
  
"Lair." Raph walked over to him. He pulled Leo's plastron to his own, heating up the older turtle.  
  
"You're going to catch something if you don't get away from my shell." Leo said.  
  
"I'll be fine. We're under running water." Raph said. "I don't want you catching another cold."  
  
"Since when do you care about my health card?"  
  
"I know its hard to believe but.. I think now the Shredder's gone we've got a chance at being a family again. Mikey and I are willing to try. What about you?"  
  
"Splinter and Casey are dead and Don's gone. How's that for a family" Leo said half growling and walked away from Raph.  
  
Raph tried to remain calm. "Do you think any of them would want us like this?" He took a deep breath. "That other Donnie was so, so upset by how we acted towards each other.."  
  
"His problem. Not mine." Leo replied, searching for a towel.  
  
Raph clenched his fist a little. "Okay." He forced himself to be calm. "What do you want then?"  
  
Leo turned to look at Raph. Even with his blindness he knew where he was. "I want you to stop pretending you like me or the idea of being a family again. We both know you hate me, when Karai captured me you didn't even hesitate to run away. If I ever have to call someone my 'family', that would be April and Angel."  
  
Raph shook a little, hearing that. "Look, Leo, I can't change what I did and you know how fucking sorry I was about that. I.. I just.. I honestly do want to try. I'm not pretending. I wanna hate you. I really do. B-but then I remember things like.. all those times you were there for me. Growing up with ya. Bro, I can't hate you completely."  
  
"But you do hate me and you only need a little flame to start a fire." Leo said as he dressed up with his old dusty coat.   
  
"You might not care but... the day I was captured was the day I lost my vision. One of Karai's soldiers hit me with more blinding powder than needed... you want to know what's the last thing I saw?"  
  
"W-what..?" Raph said, but he got the feeling he didn't wanna know.  
  
"A coward who finally got his revenge" With that said, Leo grabbed his things and headed outside.  
  
Raph stood there, motionless for a moment. He only moved once he vomited due to guilt.  
  
\----  
  
Outside, people moved one with their lives. They were used to the turtles by now so no one flinched or even whispered when Leo walked through the streets, minding his own business.  
  
"Hey big turtle man." Came Angel's voice. "What ya doing?"  
  
Leo stopped on his tracks mostly because he'd been startled. "Angel?"  
  
"Yeah, it's me. You alright? You seem pissed off." Angel said, resting her hand on Leo's shoulder.  
  
“I'm fine, really" Leo faked a smile. "Just being a grumpy old turtle like always"  
  
"I know thats such a fake smile." Angel teased. "If you wanna talk about it, you know I'll listen."  
  
Leo didn't say anything at first but then, he sighed. "... walk with me"  
  
Angel did. She didn't pressure him to speak, waiting for him to start. The streets had more people now, scavenging, looking for their relatives, kids playing with beheaded Footbots... it was a grim but cheerful view. Not that Leo could see it but it brought a little happiness to his broken spirit to hear laughter.  
  
Angel slid her hand down until she held his. She leaned it and began to describe what there was around. She did this for him. She was often his eyes when she felt like there was something he needed to see.  
  
Leo smiled, this time for real. He loved these little moments with his little sister as he usually called her. He had very fond memories of her after the rescue. It was her who helped him escape while April killed the soldiers that kept him captive. She helped him heal, stopped him from killing himself more than once, and she'd never left his side.   
  
Angel tip-toed up and kissed his temple,"That's better. There's that wonderful real smile."  
  
"Stop it" Leo mumbled, blushing shyly.   
  
Angel couldn't help but grin. "Or wwwhhhaaaatttt?" She peppered his face in soft, sisterly kisses.  
  
"Angel! Not your germs!" Leo chuckled. Only with her he allowed himself to be a bit childish.  
  
Angel giggled. "Oh you were cover in my germs ages ago." She teased. He smiled fell a little. "So.. Leo.. what will you do now the Shredder is gone?"  
  
"... honestly, I don't know. I guess now it'll be easier to go to Japan now people now we exist"  
  
"Would you feel better moving to Japan?"  
  
Leo thought for a moment then shook his head. "No. I'd miss this place too much... and you... and April..."  
  
"Will you try and look for Donnie? Shredder thought he was still alive.. him and Shadow." Angel said.  
  
"Don't... please don't say her name..."  
  
Angel pulled back her hand. "I'm.. I'm sorry.. I promise I wont again."  
  
"Thank you" Leo continued walking. He tried to find Angel's hand again.   
  
Angel took his hand. She used her other hand to stroke the back of it. "I.. I know how you feel about.. a certain brother. But what about Mikey? It might be worth trying to rebuild a connection with him."  
  
"What's there to fix? I fucked him, used him... we're through."  
  
Angel sudden stopped him, cupping his cheeks. "You listen here Mr Hamato. I'm getting sick of your attitude! Why do you insist on believe you deserve to be alone?!"  
  
"Mikey seems willing to give things a fresh start with your other brother, so why wont you take the chance?!" He voice wavered. "He still cares about you a lot but you keep driving BOTH of them away. Yes, all three of you have fucked each other over a number of times but.. the Shredder is dead. This is your chance to start fresh. And if you don't take it you'll end up b-being left out.. a-and I don't wanna see that-" Angel said, giving a small sob.  
  
Leo pulled her close and hugged her, caressing her hair. "Little sis, you worry too much"  
  
Angel sobbed into his shoulder. "I know y-you still love them and wanna be a family s-so stop driving them away! I k-know you'll outlive all of us and c-could end up with only t-them.."  
  
She was so damn right it was almost painful. He loved them and not just because of a couple of nights of beers and sweaty intercourse, no it was deeper than that. Yes, Raph's betrayal still hurt and he didn't think he could ever forgive him for that but he still loved him. And Mikey, his baby brother, the one who brought joy to his life; losing his arm didn't stop him, he still fought, survived, laughed, loved... how could he not want all of that back?  
  
They were his life, his reason to stay... but it was too late now. He'd done enough damage and somehow his capture was his way to pay for his crimes against his brothers, his friends and his father.   
  
"I need to visit someone... go back with Ted"  
  
"O-okay Leo." She kissed his temple again. "You sure you're gonna be okay?"  
  
Leo nodded. "It won't take long."  
  
Angel gave his hand a squeeze before leaving him. Leo listened to her steps until he was certain she had left before continuing his way to the remains of Central Park.


	4. Chapter 4

Raph has gained the key to the storage room that kept mostly alcohol. He locked himself in, placing the key on the side. He shook, wiping his mouth as he walked over to the many, many bottles of saki they had gotten from the Shredder and grabbed a couple.  
  
He began to down them, one by one. Not caring about the taste or anything. He just wanted the pain to go away. He just wanted to black out. He slipped to his knees as he drank more.  
  
_"Yo, gonna leave a few for me or what?"_  
  
Raph barked with laughter. "Sure Casey- one for the afterlife, huh?" He rolled on of the bottles to where 'Casey' was."  
  
_"You look like shit, bro. This has to stop"_  
  
Raph snorted. "Y-you're one to talk!" He downed another half a bottle. "Y-you're.." He felt tears build at the corner of one of his eyes. "S-shit! Fuck! Why c-couldn't you have i-ignored me! Why did you listen to me?!"  
  
‘Casey' chuckled. _"I dunno, I always did make stupid choices in my life. Had to do it one last time"_  
  
Raph sniffed, pulling off his mask. "T-this was all my fault! I drove Donnie away. I got you killed! I caused Leo to go blind and have his shell fucked up! I wasn't there to save Mikey's arm!"  
  
_"Dude, listen to yourself... you sound like a crybaby! The Raph I know ain't a crybaby and the guilt trips are Leo's thing not yours!"_  
  
Raph wiped his eyes. "F-fuck-" A mixture of blood and tears began to stream down from his socket. It happened when he got super upset, but never let anyone see it.  
  
_"Ugh, if I could slap you believe me I would."_ Casey turned his back at Raph. _"... none of this was your fault. I'm fine, Shadow's fine, Spinter's fine- hell, the only one's who are not fine are you and your bros!"_  
  
"W-wait..." Raph looked up. "Is Shadow with you in the a-afterlife? We were never s-sure.."  
  
_"What did I just say?"_  
  
"You said she's fine but you didn't say if she's dead or not!" Raph snapped, trembling. But 'Casey' knew that Raph was just scared.  
  
_"... I guess we both know the answer to that, buddy"_ 'Casey' smiled sadly. _"Don't worry, she didn't suffer."_  
  
Raph covered his face and sobbed louder. "I should have stopped her! I shouldn't have let her go! I h-honestly thought she could find h-him.."  
  
_"Raph, man... shhh..."_ 'Casey' knelt beside his friend. _"It's ok. She had the Jones' gene, she was bound to so something heroic and die for it."_  
  
_"Dad? Is that Raph?"_ Shadow said, stepping into the room from seemingly nowhere.  
  
"Oh g-god.." Raph said, shaking. He grabbed another bottle and downed it.  
  
_"Raph, I gotta go for now. Just do me a big favor, ok? For old times' sake."_  
  
"W-what?" Raph said, looking up at Casey-  
  
_"Stop drinking yourself to death. Seriously, I can't keep pulling you from the other side."_  
  
The door was suddenly kicked open and Casey was gone.  
  
"He's in here!" Ted called April.  
  
"Oh thank god!" April rushed and knelt down in front of Raph. She winced, seeing all the blood running down Raph's face and slapped his cheek a little. "Raph? Raph can you hear me?"  
  
"N..nnm... C...Casey... S..Shadow.. D-don't.." Raph said, more drunk then Ted or April had ever seen him.  
  
"One more bottle of sake and he'd be comatose by now, maybe even dead." Ted said helping April carry Raph.  
  
"We'll have to find a way to keep him away from any alcohol. Total detox." April said, hauling Raph along. "Lets get him into the infirmary."  
  
"S-s'my fault.." Raph mumbled feverishly.  
  
"Shh.. it's okay Raph. Doesn't matter what you think you've done- no one wants to see you drink yourself to death." April said.  
  
_"You listen to that woman, pal. Don't make my mistakes"_ 'Casey's' voice echoed in Raph's head.  
  
Raph groaned as he was forced onto to his side on the clinical bed. April placed the bucket under his chin in time to catch Raph's vomiting up a load of saki that had yet to be absorbed into his system.  
  
"That's it Raphie, let it all out.." April soothed, rubbing Raph's arm.  
  
"I better call a doctor. You know, just in case he's poisoned or something." Ted offered.  
  
"See? You got people taking care of you, Raphie" 'Casey' chuckled. "Go on, give life another try"  
  
Raph let out a sob. "S-shut up- easy for you t-to say-"  
  
April looked at Ted, worried. "Better get the doctor. He's a little delusional."  
  
"What's going on here? What happened to Raph?" A worried Mikey asked, alarmed by the commotion.  
  
"Easy Mikey- Raph's just.. Raph's-" April tried to explain.  
  
"Shut-up Casey!" Raph mumble, rolling over and shaking badly. In truth he didn't want Casey to shut up. He sobbed, fresh bloody tears from his socket rolling down his face and staining the pillow.  
  
"Leave us alone, please" Mikey said kneeling beside Raph. "I can handle this"  
  
"If.. if you're sure Mikey." April said, stroking Mikey's shoulder. She then left the room with Ted.  
  
Raph rolled over, his eyes slowly focusing on Mikey. He sniffed. "M-Mikey.. w-why am I s-such a terrible person..?"  
  
Mikey stroked his brother's head lovingly. "No one says you are, Raphie. Only you"  
  
Raph sniffed. "I.. I bumped into L-Leo when I went to shower.." He shivered and sobbed.  
  
"And you had a fight, didn't you?"  
  
Raph nodded. "He blames me f-for his blindness. A-and he's right. I-if I hadn't gotten so scared he w-wouldn't of.."  
  
“Don't! Just don't, Raph!" Mikey growled. "Stop it already! I hate when you say that!"  
  
Raph stopped. He looked away from Mikey. He hand sort out Mikey's and squeezed it.  
  
"Dammit Raph, how many times do we have to tell you this... what happened that night was tragic, I know! But must you do this to yourself? To me?!"  
  
Raph looked at Mikey. "C-Casey s-says the same thing.."  
  
Mikey gave him an odd look. 'Must be the alcohol talking' He thought.  
  
A doctor and a nurse came in suddenly and took care of Raph. Fortunately he hadn't reached the final stages of poisoning but he was closer than before this time.  
  
"Mikey.." Raph groaned. "I.. I need to tell ya somethin’.."  
  
Mikey waited until the humans had left. If Raph wasn't totally out of it he would've done the same but now it was up to the youngest to keep the other's dignity.  
  
"Ok, all clear Raphie"  
  
Raph held onto Mikey's hand. "I h-haven't t-told anyone this.. I.." He shivered in fear at the memory.  
  
"Shh, take your time. I'm not going anywhere"  
  
"That.. that n-night... I was s-so stupid.. Shredder g-got me and Casey a-and.. and.. Shredder r-removed my eye while torturing both me and Casey. The last t-thing he wanted me to see w-was Casey dying and the l-last thing he wanted Casey to s-see was..." Raph bit his lip, shaking worse than Mikey had ever seen him.  
  
"You don't need to tell me more, Raphie. I get it." Mikey said rubbing Raph's shell. Of all the things Shredder could've done to Raph, he didn't want to imagine what caused his brother to react this badly.  
  
"H-He.. he was g-gonna remove my o-other eye after.. a-and keep me as a p-pet.."  
  
"... a pet? Why would Shredder do that? He wanted us all dead."  
  
"Somehow he.. he knew about me and Donnie. He w-wanted to use me as bait- I-" A tear rolled down his cheek. "He wanted to.. make me into an 'attractive bait' as he put it.."  
  
"I... I don't understand..." Mikey's voice came out as a whisper.  
  
Raph sobbed. "He r-raped me Mikey! He was gonna train me a-as a sex s-slave a-as he thought that would make D-Donnie f-fall for his trap-"  
  
With his worst fears confirmed, Mikey fell his little world crumbling down again. Raph continued crying but now the youngest didn't know how or if he had what it took to comfort him. No words were going to fix this, not even Shredder's demise. He could only stay with Raph until he passed out from exhaustion. Only then, Mikey cried like he'd never cried before.


	5. Chapter 5

A few days later Raph was able to leave the hospital room. He had suffered severe alcohol poisoning and everyone on the base was instructed to keep Raph away from any alcohol. Even if it was in food. Not a single drop would pass Raph's lips.

 

Raph had other things in his mind. Even though speaking his secret had made him feel a little better, he was now worried about Mikey. Worried it had upset Mikey too much and worried his little brother would treat him differently.

 

"You w-wanna make breakfast together?" Raph asked, leaning on the crutch then had given him to help him keep himself upright. Really, he should have been in a wheelchair but he was too stubborn.

 

“Yeah, just let me finish this book" Mikey said, showing him a children's book. It was his turn to read for the kids.

 

Raph smiled. He stood in the hallway and listened. He hoped in another world Mikey had been given a chance to have children on his own as Mikey would make an amazing father.

 

"Yo, there's the patient of the year!" Ted came into the room, patting Raph's shell. "Sup?"

 

Raph smirked. "Keep calling me that and I'll give you the chance to take the title away from me." Raph said, holding up his fist in warning.

 

"You wouldn't hurt your brother in law, now would you?"

 

Raph blinked. "You didn't pop the question to Angel already, did ya?"

 

"I did and she said yes!"

 

Raph grinned, a big huge stupidly happy grin. "That is so fucking awesome."

 

"Gee, you are such a charmer with words." Ted snorted. "Wedding's gonna be in a few months. Gotta scavenge some bridal shops, the ones that aren't destroyed that is."

 

"I'll help ya once I'm allowed to leave the base." Raph said. "And I'm sure Mikey would be willing to help."

 

"Better not tell him yet or he'll want to start planning right away" Ted said. "Oh and I hope you don't mind but she wants... Leo... to give her away."

 

Raph's hand clutched his crutch tighter, but he nodded. "It's her choice and I know that Leo would really enjoy it."

 

"So, you wouldn't mind being there as my best man?"

 

Raph smiled, then hesitated. "I'd like to b-but I'm probably not the best choice."

 

"I can respect that. You still have months to change your mind though"

 

Raph nodded. "Yeah, give me time to think."

 

Mikey approached them followed by little children who wouldn't stop asking him for another story.  "Ted, these are YOUR little monsters. Do something!"

 

Ted shook his head and laughed. "Ok kids, give the giant turtle a rest will you?"

 

"Yeah, go play with uncle Ted~ He knows where the good candy is hidden!"

 

"Ye- wait what!?"

 

Raph and Mikey made their swift exit, leaving Ted to his doom. Once they walked into the kitchen and realised they were alone, Raph spoke.

 

"Ted got engaged to Angel." Raph said, smiling a little. "A-and Ted asked me to be his best man but I'm not too sure."

 

"Our little girl is getting married, who would've thought" Mikey smiled. "And what are you talking about? You'd be perfect!"

 

"Angel wants Leo to give her away." Raph said, "And I want their wedding to go without a hitch. The last thing they need is us arguing at the alter."

 

"Do you really think Leo would be enough of an asshole to do that? Really, Raph, give the dude a little credit." Mikey said.

 

Raph looked down at his feet, feeling a little ashamed. He felt more ashamed when he remembered something. "Ah, shit, Ted asked me not to tell ya yet since they wanna take their time with this. Think you can keep it to yourself?"

 

Mikey tapped his chin. "I dunno... I might need to be bribed~"

 

Raph raised an eye ridge. He then smirked. "Its nice to see you more like your old self. So, what kinda bribe are you thinking of?"

 

"... a date"

 

Raph looked at him and blinked. He then smiled. "A date would be nice. What kinda date would you wanna do?"

 

Mikey shrugged. "I don't know, you choose. It's not like I've had other dates in my life, I'm all new to this"

 

"Hmmm... candle lit dinner on the roof?" Raph suggested.

 

"Sounds good. Now what should I wear? Does pink suit me? I think it clashes with my soldier gear" Mikey joked. "And does my butt look fat still?"

 

Raph slapped Mikey on the butt more teasingly. "Nah, it's a great butt. I like your butt."

 

"Aren't you a lover turtle~ Alright then, see you tonight and don't keep me waiting. Now, you said something about breakfast, right?"

 

"Yup. Wait, who's gonna cook dinner? You or me?" Raph said

 

"We can both do it. I like having you close when I'm cooking"

 

Raph smiled. "Hey, Mikey.. t-thanks for giving me a secound chance." He said as he hobbed to the kitchen to get eggs.

 

"Don't see it as a second chance. See it more like... hmm... well, since we didn't die that night I guess this could be like a new life. New life, new beginnings sort of deal." Mikey said picking some flour and milk from the fridge.

 

Raph nodded. "Yeah, that sounds like a good way a putting it." He rested his hand on Mikey's shell. "I know that.. that I nearly drank myself to death but.. the chance of being brothers again really gave me the strength to pull through."

 

"That's another thing I wanted to discuss with you" Mikey sighed, putting the wooden spoon down. "... I know I don't have any authority over you and your decisions but... could you please... stop drinking?"

 

"I think it's time for me to stop." Raph said. He then gave a dry chuckle. "April's ordered everyone to keep alcohol away from me anyway."

 

"She's trying to keep her family alive." Mikey commented, resuming his cooking.

 

Raph looked at the kettle as he boiled water. "When I drink that much I see Casey."

 

Mikey hummed. "... does he talk to you?"

 

"Yes. But this time I saw Shadow too." Raph said. "Casey says he.." Raph shook. "He c-can’t keep bringing back from the edge of death."

 

Mikey nearly dropped the spoon. He wasn't one to believe in the supernatural now, someone had to be the skeptical one after Don disappeared but hearing stuff like that always scared him.

 

"I.. I know it sounds crazy or like drunk delusions b-but.." Raph took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. "Splinter always believed in the spirit world. A-And I hope he was right.. C-Casey said Splinter's doin' well."

 

"R-really? Well... that's... that's nice... yeah, it's nice. He deserves to be good and all."

 

Raph looked at Mikey and could see him shaking a little. He put his arm around Mikey. "S-sorry, I keep tellin' ya stuff and.. and I hate thinkin' I'm scaring or upsettin' ya."

 

Mikey shook his head. "It's not a big deal, really... I'm glad you don't keep things to yourself anymore"

 

"Are you sure?" Raph said, seriously worried. "I.. I keep things to myself because I don't wanna make things hard for anyone."

 

Mikey stopped stirring the mixture and turned to face Raph, kissing him chastely.

 

Raph blushed, kissing him back. He cupped Mikey's cheek and rubbed it with his thumb.

 

They pulled away after a while, their flustered faces and hooded eyes a familiar sight only the scenario was different. 

 

"We can continue this later" Mikey smiled. "Let's finish breakfast first"

 

\----

 

Mikey was in a good mood. He was looking forward to their date later. Raph was trying so hard and he could tell. It was like when Raph woke up he had become closer to his old self.

 

Mikey was reading through an old recipe book when he walked straight into Leo. "Oh, sorry Leo."

 

"No, it's ok. I really should use that walking stick April got me." Leo gave him a small smile.

 

"Yeah, using that you can totally smack people in the legs when they're being idiots." Mikey bit his tongue, holding in mentioning that that was what Splinter used to do. He doubted Leo wanted to hear that.

 

Fortunately, Leo didn't mind. He chuckled at the identical memories that also appeared in his mind. "I can still feel the bruises..."

 

Mikey grinned a little at that. "S-so how are you doing anyway?"

 

"Eh, same as always. Still can't see a thing, need to get a new coat... at least now I can sleep in one place without ninjas hunting me"

 

Mikey nodded. "Yeah, sleeping without feeling like you'll die any moment makes things a lot better. And that coat does smell funky."

 

"I'll find a new one as soon as possible" Leo said. "Well... I'm gonna go for a walk. It was nice talking to you"

 

"Hey.. Leo.. I.. I wanna ask you something." Mikey waited till Leo stopped walking. "Do you believe in the spirit world? That.. that the people we lost are watching over us?"

 

"Splinter used to believe that. Me? Well... I suppose." Leo said with a shrug.

 

Mikey bit his lip. "Someone... someone I know says they've seen their loved ones.. said.. said Splinter's doing well.."

 

"Hmm. Ok."

 

"I'm not sure myself. I'd like to think it was true but.." Mikey shook his head

 

"If you don't think it's real then don't let anyone force theories into your mind" Leo replied. "But if it eases your heart then I guess a little white lie doesn't hurt"

 

"Thanks Leo." Mikey said. "And Leo..?"

 

"Yes?"

 

"Try to enjoy that fact we're not longer hunted." Mikey said before walking off.

 

"... I wish I could Mikey, I wish I could" Leo mumbled to himself.

 

\---

 

Angel waited from Leo. She had told him to meet her in one of the empty living rooms of the compound. She couldn't wait to ask him to give her away. She hadn't had a chance to ask him since he had been busy the day before.

 

"Angel? Are you in here?" Leo's voice startled her.

 

"Yes." Angle got up and helped Leo to the sofa. "How are you today?"

 

Leo merely shrugged. "You sound specially happy today."

 

"I am! I have something very exciting to tell you!" Angel said, gripping Leo's hands. He could feel her shaking out of nervousness and excitement."

 

"You're not... pregnant, are you?"

 

"No, no! Not.. not yet but-" Leo could hear in her voice that she was grinning. "Ted proposed to me! We're getting married!"

 

Leo smiled widely. "Really? Angel, that's... wow! Congratulations!"

 

"And... and I want you to- w-would you do me a honor of giving me away?" Angel asked.

 

"Of course I'll give you away!" Leo suddenly hugged her tightly."Gosh, Angel... this is amazing!"

 

Angel hugged him back as tightly. "I'm so glad you said yes! I-it won't be fore a few months but- Oh gosh! I'm so glad you said yes!!"

 

"Why would I say no to this, sister? I'm honored you chose me"

 

Angel kissed his temple. "I love you Leo. You mean so much to me."

 

"Sweetie, if only there was someone like you out there you'd see ME getting married right away" Leo chuckled.

 

Angel giggled. "I might happen. You never know."

 

Leo snorted, shaking his head. "Have you started with the preparations already?"

 

"Ted says he's gonna start scavenging soon, but it'll be a few months." Angel said.

 

"Good. Do the others know about this?"

 

"Only a small handful of people." Angel said. "We wanna get closer to the date- which we haven't set yet- before we tell everyone."

 

Leo nodded in understanding. He suspected Raphael and Michelangelo knew about the wedding already but that didn't concern him; as long as he stayed closer to Angel that day, he wouldn't have to talk to them.

 

Angel cupped Leo's cheeks. "Don't worry, if it comes between you or your brothers, Ted has agreed that you are the one who takes priority in coming to our wedding."

 

Leo arched a brow. "Isn't that favoritism?"

 

"Yes it is and you'll have to deal with it." Angel kisses his forehead

 

Leo chuckled. "Alright but I'm not playing catch the garter or catch the bouquet or any of that"

 

"Awwww~" She then remembered something. "OH! I know your birthday isn't for another month but I wanted to give you this now.." Angel grabbed something. "I found it and it was perfect for you." She handed him a wrapped package

 

Calloused fingers roamed over the wrinkled paper. "What is it?"

 

"Open it and find out." Angel smiled.

 

"Angel, if this is  prank-" Leo warned her as he opened the package.

 

The smell of real leather hit his nose. A few touched confirmed it was a new coat.

 

"Angel, where did you find this?" Leo asked with smile, his fingers still studying the texture.

 

"One of the shops a while ago. I was waiting for your birthday but.. I wanted to give it you as a reward for pulling through."

 

That hurt. He hadn't pulled through; if anything, he was just diving deeper into his black hole of gloom and desperation. His talks with Master Splinter weren't working and he felt less attached to his... brothers... that word now sounded so wrong coming from him. 

 

"Thanks Angel. I'll try to not mess it up too much." Leo chuckled.

 

Angel cupped his cheek. "Please don't be hard on yourself. I can tell when you are."

 

Leo sighed and nodded. "... I knew someone with that special ability and I lost him. Please don't go down that road, will you?" 

 

He leaned over to kiss Angel's forehead and went to one of the rooms April left for him whenever he was around. Maybe a nap would help him forget. Or remember. 

 

Whichever came first.


	6. Chapter 6

_ "I can't believe Raph didn't listen!" Mikey said. "Okay, I can believe it. We don't even know if the Shredder has Donnie!" _

 

_ He dodged an oncoming swing of a katana from one of the foot ninja. _

 

_ "Leave it to him to not listen to me at all" _

 

_ "Yeah,-" Mikey said. "And leave it to us to have to rescue his sorry ass." _

 

_ "Mikey, behind you!" Leo alerted him, kicking a footbot away. _

 

_ Mikey spun and kicked them away. "HA! You'll have to try harder to hurt the BATTLE NEXUS CHAMPION!" _

 

_ "FOCUS ON THE BATTLE, MICHELANGELO!" Leo scolded him.  _

 

_ The footbot's severed arm crawled towards him and grabbed Leo's ankle.  _

 

_ "Shit! I hate those fuckers!" _

 

_ Mikey dashed over and kicked it away. "We're never gonna get to him at this- RAPH!" _

 

_ Raph came running out, obviously panicking. Blood was streaming down his face from his empty eye socket. _

 

_ "Oh.. oh god.. RAPH!" _

 

_ "Where? Where is he?!" Leo turned frenetically, divided between looking for his brother and dodging the incoming ninjas.  _

 

_ He barely caught a glimpse of Mikey's orange mask tails waving as his little brother ran as fast as he could, separating from him.  _

 

_ "MIKEY! I TOLD YOU TO STAY-" _

 

_ "Leonardo." Karai said, holding out her sword. "There are more important things to be focused on right now." _

 

_ "You already took my father from me, what else do you want?!" _

 

_ "Where is Donatello?" Karai asked, her expression plain. "My father requires him." _

 

_ Despite the curtain of smoke left by the smoke pellets, Leo could see he was being cornered and surrounded and there was no sight of Mikey or Raph. "How can I know he doesn't have him already?" _

 

_ "I see. You don't have him either." She suddenly sliced her sword across his face. She had always wanted to do that. _

 

_ Leo recoiled with a grunt of pain; he'd really wanted to scream but he wouldn't give her the satisfaction of seeing him suffer. His bloodstained mask fell off his face, perfectly cut in two. He bared his teeth like a savage animal and tightened the grip on his swords.  _

 

_ "So this is how you want it to be..." Leo muttered. "Fine by me."  _

 

_ He ran towards the kunoichi, his mind set on slicing her in two just like his mask. She stood there, unfazed, feeding Leo's rage even more. Suddenly, elite ninjas jumped in front of her, protecting her.  _

 

_ It didn't matter how many ninjas Leo had to kill that night, Karai would die and he would make sure she suffered before doing so. So blind with anger and bloodlust, Leo failed to noticed the elite ninja pulling something from his belt. _

 

_ Out of nowhere something was thrown into Leo's face. There was a bright flash, then darkness. In his disorientation he was pulled down, forced onto the ground. _

 

_ "Rip his shell off." _

 

_ The elite began to do just that. They brought out hammers and chisels, beginning to rip away chunks of shell. The strangled scream that escaped his mouth was unfamiliar to Leo; he wasn't sure what hurt the most, the burning sensation in his eyes or the excruciating sharp pain coming from his back as his shell was slowly ripped from his being. _

 

_ "GET AWAY FROM MY BROTHER!" Came Mikey's voice. Leo didn't see what happened next, all he knew was a few minutes later he was slung over Mikey's shoulder, being carried away. _

 

_ Leo could hear Karai's enraged scream and her orders being shout in japanese: she wanted them dead. Slowly the red and black uniforms faded into pure black then grey; the more he blinked, the more his eyes burned. _

 

_ An elite ninja pulled him away from Michelangelo's protective hold and in the commotion, the leader was thrown unceremoniously on the cold ground, confused and scared.  _

 

_ "Mikey?... Raph?.... ANYONE??!" _

 

_ "It's okay Leo, I've got you." Came Angel's voice. He felt cold relief on his eyes as she poured water to get out the blinding powder. _

 

_ With the corner of his damaged eyes, Leo saw red but this time, it wasn't blood. "... R...aph?" _

 

_ Raph stared at him for a moment, horrified then turned and ran way. He didn't even look back or try to help. Everything seemed to move in slow motion. Angel trying to keep him awake, Mikey limping towards them, elite ninjas coming after them and Raph... he just ran and ran... and ran...  _

_ In Leo's eyes, his brother's red tattered mask began to turn grey as well as his dark green skin... there was no more color, just shapes and then... nothing. _

 

\----

 

"Leo.. oh Leo.." Angel's soft voice came as Leo started awake. She was stroking his head.

 

He hadn't noticed how badly he was shaking until he fully woke up. It was really dark now which meant evening had fallen upon them; now he could see shapes better.

 

"Angel...?"

 

Angel smiled at him. "It's okay, it's okay. I'm here. Everything's okay.."

 

Slowly, Leo sat up. His body felt heavy and sweaty. "... what are you doing here?"

 

"I was heading to bed when I h-heard you.." She stroked his face. "You were dreaming about.. about that night again weren't you?"

 

Leo stopped her gentle ministrations with a firm but gentle hand.

 

Angel pressed a bottle of water into his hand. "Try and get some more sleep." She stood.

 

_ 'Yeah right... more sleep is just what I need...' _ Leo thought grimly. They both knew sleep would be the last thing in Leo's mind for the rest of the night.


	7. Chapter 7

Meanwhile on the rooftop, a smiling Mikey waited for his date. He'd made sure to make Raph's favorites in secret as well as to change his mask for the one he used to wear when they were teens; it brought him great memories.

 

Raph hobbled onto the roof, crutch in one hand and a bottle of something in the other. He smiled at Mikey and came over to the table. "It.. its took me a while to find but-" Raph place a bottle of Mikey's favorite soda on the table.

 

"Impossible... this... I've been looking forever for one of this!" Mikey beamed grabbing the bottle and looking at it from all angles.

 

Raph grinned. "Yeah, but it's a lot easier to find stuff without so many Foot Bots around." He settled down at the table.

 

"Did you use Mr. Garcia's cologne?" Mikey chuckled, scrunching up his nose.

 

"Y-yeah, I thought it would be better than the smell of cigs.." Raph rubbed his neck and blushed. He looked at Mikey. "Hey! You're wearing your old bandanna."

 

"Oh, this old thing? It's nothing, just something I found in my closet~" Mikey said playing with the mask tails.

 

"It's cute~" Raph smiled. "You're cute."

 

Mikey blushed ducking his head. "You've never called me that..."

 

"W-well you are." Raph said, he wasn't much of a charmer.

 

Mikey laughed quietly, it was obvious Raph was trying way too hard. "Shall we eat now?"

 

"Yes~" Raph pulled up the cover on his plate. He grinned when he saw what there was. "Hey! Mac and Cheese! I love Mac and cheese."

 

"And that one is not spoiled" Mikey said proudly.

 

Raph grinned. "Thanks Mikey~" He poured Mikey and himself some of the soda.

 

"Did you ever think about seeing the city this peaceful? Well, as peaceful as it can get"

 

"Only in my good dreams." Raph smiled. "What about you?"

 

"I always thought this day would come, honestly." Mikey answered. "I dreamt that one day we'd be strong and numerous enough to take down Shredder and free the world..."

 

"In the end it took another Donnie to show we could have done it with what we had.."

 

Mikey sighed. "True... but hey, a turtle can dream right?"

 

Raph retched across the table and held Mikey's hand. "Yeah. Yeah a turtle can dream. My dream now is that, since the Shredder is dead and Mortu's healing... the utroms might have a way to give you an arm... biological or robotic."

 

"Even if they can't make it possible, I wouldn't worry about that." Mikey replied. "I kinda like being able to kick your ass with just one arm~"

 

Raph smiled, a little sadly. "Yeah, you do kick ass."

 

"... are you alright?"

 

Raph rubbed his face. "Yeah, yeah I'm good." He ate some more food. "I just want you to be happy."

 

Mikey just played with his food, worried he'd said something that upset Raph.

 

Raph got up and walked around the table. He put his arm around him. "I love ya Mike."

 

The youngest was startled by the sudden gesture but returned the embrace. "Love you too, Raphie"

 

Raph nuzzled him. He smiled and sat back down. "So.. now humans know about us.. what do you want to do? Once the world starts to rebuild itself.."

 

"Well, I could resume my painting career or maybe I'll start a gaming website"

 

"I miss the internet." Raph said. "I'm sure they'll have it up and running ASPA. Ted said he saw a singel internet single bar on his laptop the other day."

 

Mikey chuckled. "The moment the internet is back, the world can kiss my shell goodbye"

 

Raph chuckled too. "Yeah, but I think it would be nice if we started to clean the city a little. Maybe we can find one of those fancy penthouses..."

 

"You wanna live in a penthouse?"

 

"What? Do you wanna live in the sewer again?" Raph smiled.

 

Mikey shrugged. "I'll take whatever I can get as long as I have a warm meal every day"

 

Raph smiled. "Yeah, you're right. But the view would be nice."

 

"... you'd let me stay with you?" Mikey asked timidly.

 

"Of course I would." Raph said.

 

"Good because I don't think I can let you go again."

 

Raph felt a lump in his throat. "Same here Mike."

 

Mikey stood up and walked towards Raph taking his hand. "C'mon..."

 

Raph got up and gripped Mikey's hand firmly, lovingly. They walked to the edge of the roof and looked down at the city, still in ruins but more inhabited after the destruction for the last footbots and elite ninjas left in that area.

 

"Not exactly a beautiful sight but at least there's people..."

 

"And children. Real children. None of those fucking child-bot-traps." Raph grunted

 

Mikey snorted. "One of the reasons I'm not adopting." He said gesturing his missing arm.

 

Raph looked at the missing arm. "Yeah.. yeah I don't blame you." He looked back at the sceneary. "I.. I do hope the utroms will help.."

 

"What, am I not pretty enough?" Mikey pouted.

 

"No, no!" Raph said, blushing a little. He then settled down. "I.. I was thinking more Leo. Maybe Mortu has a way of fixing Leo's eyesight.."

 

"You think he'll want to see again? I mean, it's not like he's around not even with Shredder gone and he's obviously refusing any help..."

 

"Then we might have to do it for his own good." Raph said. "There's NO way he's happy blind."

 

"But we can't force him" Mikey pointed out.

 

Raph didn't say anything to that.

 

Mikey sighed and let go of Raph's hand. "... I'm sorry. I should've shut up"

 

Raph grabbed his hand back. "It's okay." He smiled a little. "It's not like Leo could hate me any more."

 

"I hate seeing you two like this. I thought we'd be a family again" Mikey whimpered.

 

"I offered and I tried, I really did Mikey." Raph said, getting upset. "I tried so hard and even control my temper and didn't bite back. But each time he’s shot me down and made me seem like a horrible person." Raph grip on Mikey's hand got tighter. "I.. I nearly drank myself to death because he told me the last thing he saw was me.. me abandoning him."

 

"But you know it wasn't your fault. You were scared, confused and hurt..." Mikey replied. "... maybe if he knew what happened-"

 

Raph shook his head. "It.. it wouldn't make a difference.."

 

"How do you know that?"

 

"He lost his eyesight and had his shell ripped off.." Raph said

 

"And you were raped and lost your best friend all in one day, Raphael. I'm not saying both your injuries weren't serious but he could understand if you just-"

 

Raph shook his head. "I really don't think i-it would change things."

 

"Ok, ok. Forget I said anything then" 

 

Mikey managed to get his hand back and walked back to the table. The sooner he cleaned up, the better.

 

"Mikey.." Raph walked over. "I'm sorry I just- I just c-can't bring myself to tell him.."

 

"... help me out here. Our date isn't over"

 

Raph went silent and helped him. Once the table was free from items, Mikey waited for Raph to go downstairs.

 

Raph instead retched over and stroked Mikey's cheek. "Do.. do you really think it would make a difference?"

 

"It worked for me, didn't it?" Mikey asked back, taking Raph's hand and keeping it pressed gently against his cheek.

 

Raph smiled a little. "Yeah, yeah.. I'll... I'll think about it. A-and I really mean that."

 

Mikey smiled back and leaned in for a kiss. Raph leaned over and kissed him softly. Lovingly. Mikey put his arm around Raph's shell, pressing himself closer. Raph let out a soft rolling churr, letting Mikey's tongue in. Mikey pulled away reluctantly and without another word, he took Raph downstairs towards his improvised room.

 

Raph sat on Mikey's bed. "Mikey.." He rubbed his hand up Mikey's front.

 

The youngest cupped Raph's cheek. "Remember our first time? I was so nervous and you... you looked like you'd done it before." He chuckled.

 

Raph smiled. "W-well I had done. Me and D-... I just had done." He stroked Mikey's hips.

 

"... would you believe me if I told you I'm kind of nervous now?"

 

Raph smiled. "I'm a little too. I.. I want this to be us starting over."

 

Mikey tugged at Raph's jacket as he laid down on the mattress, taking the red masked turtle with him. Raph slipped off his jacket, leaning over Mikey. He smiled before kissing him again,

 

Mikey sighed happily, feeling loved instead of used. Somehow he felt this encounter would be different and he'd take full advantage of it. He churred when Raph's lips attached to his neck, suckling the skin so gently, so un-Raph like... 

 

His lone arm wrapped itself around his lover and caressed the back of his neck and shell. Raph smiled and nuzzled Mikey softly. "What do you want me to do?"

 

Mikey didn't know what to say at first; he'd never been asked about his carnal needs before. He just laid down, presented himself at his lovers and let them do as they pleased but this was new.

 

Raph nuzzled him. "It's okay, take your time."

 

"... make love to me. Not just sex..."

 

Raph smiled. He kissed Mikey softly again. He stroked Mikey's sides softly, scraping his fingers against the rough texture. Mikey arched after every touch; Raph was taking his time exploring him, learning about all his old and new injuries only by touching. He did the same, discovering more scars than the ones he imagined Raph would have. Most of them were bullet wounds, a clear sign that he'd been looking for trouble on purpose.

 

Raph kissed softly over Mikey's heart, stroking the younger's neck. He then dragged his tongue upwards until he retched his collarbone, which he suckled. Mikey bit his lip, whimpering. His face could might as well match Raph's mask at this point. Speaking of mask... 

 

"Y-your mask... take it off..."

 

Raph hesitated for the moment. "Are... are you sure? It an't a very pretty sight."

 

Mikey smiled softly and slowly began to untie the red tattered piece of cloth. Raph's face had a permanent scar where his eye had been once as well as an empty socket that thankfully was nice and clean. 

 

With a gentle hand, Mikey caressed Raph's face as if it was made of porcelain. 

 

"I don't know... you're pretty handsome to me~"

 

Raph blushed a little and looked down. "E-even the socket...?"

 

Mikey grinned and jerked his hips up to rub their lower plastrons together causing Raph to shudder. Raph couldn't help but rock his hips back. He leaned down and kissed Mikey softly, rubbing his hips.

 

They worked each other up till the point neither of them could keep their panting and churrs in control as well as their needy members. Now with both cocks rubbing against each other, slick and hard, Mikey looked up at his mate lustfully. 

 

"Love me, Raphael~"

 

Raph smiled. "Of course I love you Mikey." He gripped both his and Mikey's cock and rubbed them slowly.

 

Mikey giggled. "You know what I meant, silly"

 

Raph smiled, rubbing their cock more. He kissed Mikey softly, churring lovingly.

 

Mikey responded with a submissive churr, spreading his legs more. Raph smiled, he pulled back. He shifted down, rubbing Mikey's cock as he began to lick and suckle Mikey's tail.

 

"N-not there! You know I-guhhhnnn~ Y-yeah~" Mikey was slowly turning into putty under Raph's expert hands.

 

He didn't know his tail was that sensible until now.

 

Raph suckled on Mikey's tail for a bit till he moved up his tongue to lap at Mikey's entrance. The amount of new things and sensations he was feeling almost drove Mikey to climax; it took a big amount of self control to prevent that from happening.

 

Raph pulled up, sensing Mikey getting close. He licked all the way up Mikey's plastron. "Ready for me?"

 

"Could you give me a sec? I feel like the moment you get in, I'll just loose it and that's gonna be embarrassing"

 

Raph chuckled. He nibbled Mikey's neck, churring.

 

"W-what did I tell you about giving me sec?" Mikey chuckled. "Dude, you're not helping here"

 

Raph smirked, "Alright, alright." Raph leaned back. He began to rub his cock back to life.

 

Mikey licked his lips. "Now that's a hot sight~"

 

Raph blushed a little, rubbing a little more. "Yeah? You like that?" He churred.

 

"Mmmmhm~"

 

Raph smiled and leaned over, kissed him a couple of time.

 

Mikey bit Raph's lip playfully. "So, you gonna do me or what~?"

 

"Ohhh! I see how it is- Mr give-me-a-moment." Raph smirked and kissed Mikey deeply, shifting into position. He broke the kiss and spat on his hand, coating his dick. "Ready?"

 

Mikey nodded, tensing up despite his arousal.  _ 'Relax, this won't be like last time' _ He thought.

 

Raph took Mikey's cock in his other hand and rubbed slowly. He then pushed into Mikey, stopping whenever Mikey tensed up. It didn't burn as much like his other encounters and for that Mikey was so glad; the special attention Raph was giving to his dick was also appreciated. Letting out a breathy moan, Mikey smiled. 

 

"D-damn~ Were you always this big~?"

 

Raph chuckled. "I get bigger as I get older, l-like the rest of me."

 

Mikey snorted. "Learned new tricks, old dog? I'd like to see that~"  He purred rocking his hips.

 

Raph churred. He leaned up and nuzzled Mikey, pressing his cock into Mike's sweet spot. He suckled on Mikey's neck. Mikey moaned loudly, wrapping his legs around Raph's shell. "R-Raphie~"

 

Raph bucked into Mikey's sweet spot over and over again. "Feel good?"

 

Mikey threw his head back, his eyes were closed and his mouth was parted open. "M-more than good~"

 

Raph kissed Mikey over and over again as he moved a little harder. It felt so good to him too.

 

"Raphieeee~ Raphie, oh god~!" Mikey's moans echoed all over the room. 

 

Never in his life had Raphael heard him moan like this. At all. Now he realized those other times, Mikey had been  faking it. Raph didn't know how to feel about that. Other than Ted had been right. So he'd make it up to him. He rubbed Mikey's cock as he move faster. He suckled on Mikey's neck and stroked his head with his other hand.

 

Mikey nuzzled Raph's hand, purring and wagging his tail happily; all this attention almost felt unreal, if he was dreaming he never wanted to wake up. He arched his back, whimpering, when Raph moved faster.

 

Raph churred deeply. "S-still feeling g-good?" He panted, rocking harder, making sure to to hit his sweet spot every time.

 

"Y-yeeeaaahh~ Raphie, harder please!"

 

Raph grinned. "Anything my Mikey wants~" He began to pound much harder, but watched Mikey's face to make sure he wasn't hurting him.

 

Tears welled up in his eyes, clouding Mikey's baby blue eyes. "Raphie, s-so... so close~ W-wannaahhh~ T-together!" He was finding it hard to talk at the moment.

 

Raph churred louder. He pumped Mikey's cock faster and kissed Mikey's tears away before cumming in Mikey at the same time Mikey came. As they came down from their pleasure cloud, Mikey sobbed quietly, a smiled plastered on his face.

 

Raph slipped onto the bed better. He stayed in Mikey but wrapped the blanket around both of them and covered his face in kisses.

 

"Thank you... thank you so much..." Mikey sobbed.

 

"Shh.. it's okay.." He stroked Mikey's head. "I p-promise it'll be like that more."

 

Mikey hugged Raph closer and kissed him deeply. They spent the rest of the night whispering sweet little nothings to each other until they fell asleep smiling and clinging onto the other just like when they were teens. 

 


	8. Chapter 8

Raph had snuck out of the base and into the Shredder's tower. He went to the room Mikey had said Murto was healing.

 

"Evening Raphael." Chaplin said. "Did you wish to speak to Murto? He's awake."

 

"Good. I need ya talk with him." Raph grunted

 

"About what, if I may know?" Mortu's voice startled both Chaplin and Raph. 

 

The healed utrom, came in his exosuit, refusing to stay in the healing chamber any second longer.

 

Raph smiled, looking at him. "It great to see you up and about." He turned completely to face Mortu. "First of all, will the Utroms be helping with the rebuilding effort?"

 

"Once my superiors get the word that I'm alive, they'll send units using the transmat device Honeycutt built"

 

Raph let out a breath of relief. "Oh thank shell for that!" He then looked to Murto. "A-as you know my brothers and I have... have lost a lot in the fight against Shredder. A-and although the emotional scars won't go, I was hoping something could be done about the physical ones for Leo."

 

Mortu frowned, concerned and surprised about the news. "I didn't know your brother was injured. No offense but of all you four he was the best fighter, not a single scratch after battling for hours"

 

Raph retched up and removed his bandanna, showing his eye socket. "It just took one night. I.. I lost my eye. Mikey lost his arm... A-and Leo lost his eyesight and had most of his shell ripped off."

 

Mortu winced. "I see. That must have been devastating for you"

 

"Yes. I can live with this. Mikey's too paranoid for a robotic arm. But Leo needs his eyesight. He'd never admit it but I know he's severely depressed without it. A-and something to help his shell would mean a lot too... it's always infected" He replaced his bandanna. "S-so.. what can be done?"

 

"Well, I would need to examine him closer and check for infections, fragments and other things that could've crawled in there. As for his eyesight, and that's the trickiest part, the healing worms wouldn't help much and we don't possess that kind of equipment for now. However I could contact a friend of mine, Dr. Zilx, he'll know what to do"

 

Raph nodded. "Problem is Leo HATES me." He rubbed his neck. "A-and I know he would be resistant... but it would be for his own good. S-so...  I might have... sedate him and treat him while he's out cold."

 

Mortu moved his exosuit's arm to scratch his head. "That would be traumatizing and wouldn't help at all, not considering his actual condition. Isn't there someone else who can convince him?"

 

"Hm... yes, yes there is someone. But I'd have to not seem involved at all.." Raph rubbed his chin. "So, how long till you can contact your people and get the forced to help? I'm guessing when you do, you'll be able to get this Dr Zilx to come too.."

 

"Getting Zilx to come is the easy part. The hard part is to convince the counsel to bring units to Earth even with me alive but don't worry. I give you my word that utroms will do what they can to help you rebuild this world"

 

"Considering the Shredder plagued our planet for years when he was an Utrom, ya council has a responsibility to help." Raph said.

 

Mortu nodded. "Give me a couple of days, Raphael"

 

"I will. I have to talk to others." Raph turned. "And Mortu... it's great to see you."

 

"The feeling is mutual. Until we meet again" 

 

And so Mortu went back to where the other utroms were located to wait for the others. Raph went out the building, heading straight to the bed.

 

\--

 

"Ted, I need ta talk to ya." Raph said, grabbed the man by the back of the shirt. He began to drag Ted away from Angel

 

Angel giggled and waved goodbye to her man as he was dragged off.

 

"Bro, this cockblocking attitude of yours is starting to piss me off" Ted said jokingly.

 

Raph smirked. "Trust me, pull this off and you'll get a VERY grateful Angel." He said once when they were out of earshot.

 

"Ooook? So what's up?"

 

"I went to Shredder Towers, to talk to an Utrom named Mortu." Raph said. "I asked him if there was a way to fix Leo's eyesight and shell a-and-" Raph buzzed with excitement "-and as soon as he can make contact with his people, he knows this doctor who might be able to help!"

 

"That sounds awesome! So why do you need me? I'm just a psychologist." Ted said.

 

"I know Leo won't agree to it if he knows it’s me arranging it. I need you to take the credit." Raph said. "And get Angel to convince him."

 

"... and you think this is going to work because?"

 

"My original plan was to sedate Leo." Raph said. "But Murto said that might make things worse."

 

"Hmm, yeah but the only ones who know Mortu are you guys. Leo is going to know either you or Mikey told me"

 

"Hmm.. gonna have to talk ta Mike.." Raph rubbed his chin.

 

"I could do it though, if Mikey is coming with me" Ted said.

 

Raph nodded. "Yeah, you should go meet Murto.." Raph patted Ted on the back. "Thanks mate. I'll arrange a field trip."

 

"By the way, whatever you did to Mikey really changed him." Ted let him know with a smile. "He's a whole new turtle"

 

"I just followed your advise and treated him like a brother again." Raph grinned

 

"It's done something to you too, I see"

 

"Yeah-yeah, just don't gloat." Raph said, teasing.

 

Ted chuckled, walking away. "Oh by the way, there's news of a small elite team hiding in the abandoned part of Chinatown. April wants you to go with her and her team"

 

Raph nodded. He would after he explained things to Mikey. He headed of to try and find Mikey

 

\----

 

In the less concurred part of town, things weren't as calmed. A small group of looters and vandals terrorized the remaining survivors, stealing the little supplies they had as well as destroying properties and starting fires. 

 

The same scenario welcomed Leonardo every single time he came to this neighborhood. April and her rebels weren't miracle workers after all, they couldn't depend on her to help these people and neither could he.

 

Unsheathing his lone katana, Leo jumped from the rooftop, waiting for the vandals to come. This wasn't the fighting style of a ninja, he knew that, but there was no ninja blood left in him, he'd been reduced to a killer. A killer with a purpose.

 

"Hey guys look! Its that blind turtle." Said one of the thugs to Leo's right. "Where's your walking stick?!"

 

Leo stood his ground, unfazed. He could hear two behind him, one on his left with chains and the one of his right, the loud mouth, the most nervous of all. He smirked, that would be the last to go.

 

"Get him boys!"

 

All of them went for Leo.

 

The blind warrior waited till the last moment to jump; the thugs crashed against each other unceremoniously.

 

One jerked up. "Hey! You're supposed to be blind!" That they rushed at Leo.

 

Calmly, Leo stepped to the side. The wall behind him would take care of the lowlife bastard for him. Leo heard the guy know himself out and slide to the floor.

 

"How the hell is he doin' that!?"

 

"C'mon boys, don't tell me a blind freak is too much for you" Leo mocked them.

 

"Maybe,. maybe he's just faking blindness to freak us out!" One grunted

 

Leo snorted. "Taking me for a liar? Now that's just cruel"

 

One thug has tried to sneak up and smack Leo in the head with a bat. Effortlessly, Leo slashed the thing in two, barely sparing the thug's fingers.

 

"Lets get out of here-" One thug said to the other one. It was just those two left.

 

_ 'That's it... keep running...'  _ The smirk on Leo's face widened as he prepared himself to make his final move.

 

The thugs did. One mentioning that they 'got away'. One of them stumbled and fell on the destroyed gravel hard and didn't get up, scaring his partner in crime.

 

"Dude! Get up! We have to move!"

 

The seemingly unconscious man didn't move; he laid on his side, limbs sprawled in odd angles.

 

But before Leo could do his final move, there was a thunk and the last thug fall, completely unconscious.

 

"You shouldn't play with them." Mikey's voice came.

 

Leo ignored his brother's presence and went to retrieve his shuriken, embedded on the bulkiest man's forehead.

 

Two down and one still breathing thanks to Mikey's intervention. Not a total victory for him but he could always catch that thug again some other day, when he wasn't disturbed by unwanted company.

 

"I need to talk ta ya." Mikey said, stepping over the body's.

 

The shuriken came out with a slurp sound, sickening to most but it was music to Leo's ears.

 

"What is it"

 

"This might be a stupid question but-" Mikey braced himself. "If you could have your eyesight restored by the Utroms, would you?"

 

The small weapon almost fell from Leo's grasp. "... What did you say?"

 

"Ted and I went to Murto." Mikey said. "He wanted updates, I told him about our injuries and he said he knew a doctor who could come and.. and fix your eyesight and shell." Mikey didn't mention it was really Raph who did it, even if Mikey thought he should.

 

Leo twirled the bloodied shuriken between his fingers, mulling over the idea of being the ninja he used to be once again.

 

"You've got two weeks or some to decide. He and the other Utroms are building a device to contact their people. Then the doctor will arrive and treat you if you want." Mikey said. "If.. if you want my advice..I'd get your shell fixed at least. I know how vulnerable it is."

 

"I'm not vulnerable" Leo said in a low voice that sent shivers down Mikey's spine.

 

"I didn't say YOU were. I said IT was. It's a weak spot. It gives you sickness all the time."

 

"I am NOT sick, Michelangelo" Leo replied, now getting angry. "Now if you'll excuse me, there's people who DO need help"

 

Mikey growled suddenly. Before Leo knew it, he was on his plastron, Mikey's hand positioned to destroy Leo's spine if he struggled.

 

"It’s. A. WEAKNESS." He growled lowly. He got up and pulled away before Leo would get hurt. "Plus, once Ted tells Angel, you know she won't leave you alone about it." Mikey said,

 

Leo took his time getting off the ground. Then he dusted himself like nothing had happened.

 

"Just.. please seriously consider it." Mikey said. He looked at his hand and could see it covered in pus and other liquids. "At least talk to the doctor when he arrives."

 

Leo grabbed his katana and slowly walked away. He wasn't weak, he didn't need any help. He did feel a little more tired now... maybe just a quick check up- 

 

No. 

 

Donnie did their check ups, that was HIS job. But then again... 

 

"I'll think about it"

 

Mikey nodded. He turned his shell to Leo. "Donnie would want you to do it. He always trusted Mortu too.." And then left.

 

Leo frowned, he'd just felt Raph's musk coming from the youngest, obviously they'd been together recently. 

 

Fuck them. And fuck Mikey for being such a whore. Just a couple of nights he refused to be with him but he willingly let Raphael take him. No, he wasn't angry. He wasn't jealous either... just... he didn't know how to feel now.

 

\----

 

"You know what I'mma gonna say, Leo." Angel said, sitting with Leo. "So I wanna hear your opinion on it. Rant if you want. There's no one around."

 

"For the last time, Angel, I don't need this. I've been partially blind for 30 years and as long as I have a coat, my shell is fine!"

 

Angel stroked Leo's cheek. "Don't you wanna see? Don't you wanna see my face?"

 

Leo chuckled. "You can be a little devil when you want to, Angel."

 

"I've always been a devil in disguise, you know that." Angel said. "But seriously Leo. Please at least talk to the doctor.. for me. I wanna see you look me in the eyes and I wanna know that you can see mine.."

 

God, he wanted to see her face again, see how much she'd changed, although no matter how many years passed she'd still be that beautiful little girl with purple hair he'd meet on that alleyway escaping from justice, innocence and confusion plastered in her enchanting brown eyes. 

 

"Angel... you know I'd do anything for you..." He sighed heavily. "... but I don't know..."

 

Angel slipped her arms around him and hugged him carefully. "I love you Leo, and I'll support any decision you make. Even if it’s not the one I want."

 

For a moment there, he thought he'd heard Donatello speak to him. The girl's slim body was nothing like his brother's but without his vision, it became easier to imagine he was holding him in his arms again. 

 

"If I go, would you be there for me?"

 

"You'd have a hard time keeping me away."

 

Leo chuckled, caressing her hair. "... I always wanted to see your new hairstyle. It was a shame that you had to cut it so many years ago"

 

"I can grow it long again." She said softly. "And this time you could help me pick out a better hairstyle."

 

"Sure, ask the bald guy"

 

Angel snorted. "Maybe the Utron Doctor can do something about that."

 

"Ok now you're just being silly" Leo laughed quietly, messing up her hair.

 

Angel giggled. "Okay okay, let's put the matter to rest for a bit and have some lunch.

 


	9. Chapter 9

_ Leo had been taken back to base because of his injuries. Casey was dead. Raph was missing. _

 

_ This was the worst night of Mikey's and April's lives, but they knew they had to keep trying. They had a bomb and they were gonna use it no matter what. _

 

_ "So what's the plan, chief?" _

 

_ "There's a series of underground ducts that we need to get into. if we can blow up one side of the building, it should cause it to collapse." April said. _

 

_ Mikey groaned. "Couldn't we just send one of those robots to do this? Bombs freak me out" _

 

_ "We can but we have to get close enough or it might be found out too quickly." _

 

_ Mikey didn't like this plan at all. He'd rather stay on the base and tend for the wounded, look after his brother.  _

 

_ "April... look, I know we... I-I miss Casey too but-" _

 

_ "Oh Mikey I- LOOK OUT!" April said, suddenly moving as one of massive Karai bots jumped down of their position. _

 

_ They split up; the number one rule and they had to break it before the robot took their heads. Mikey barely had time to check if April had made it out alive.  _

 

_ "APRIL, YOU GO AHEAD! I'LL DISTRACT THIS THING!" _

 

_ "MIKEY! YOU BETTER MEET BACK UP WITH ME!" April said. She had no where near the skill to even dent one of those things. However, she was able to slap the bomb onto the back of one as she ran out. _

 

_ Mikey threw his last explosive shurikens at the robot and ran away. He wasn't stupid to stay and battle a Karai bot; once he did, more would be coming his way and he had to go back with April. _

 

_ The smoke from the explosions was perfect for a quick escape. Dodging the falling scrap metal, Mikey made his way to the nearest alley. But a Karai Bot seemed determined to get Mikey. He followed him through the smoke. _

 

_ Mikey turned his head to see the giant robot coming after him. "You gotta be kidding me..." _

 

_ The Karai bot attacked, trying to make it impossible for Mikey to get away. Shielding himself with his nunchucks was a bad idea but the only one that crossed Mikey's mind. It was losing a nunchuck or losing his head. _

 

_ What Mikey did not anticipate was the botu swinging a sword from seemingly not where. Leaving Mikey no time to react. _

 

_ From across the street, April couldn't see anything by smoke. Lots of smoke and scrap metal everywhere. And suddenly, a scream... _

 

_ "MIKEY!" April shouted. She knew that scream. She jumped out from her hiding space and ran through the smoke, looking for her adopted brother. There was no way she'd lose another family member tonight. _

 

_ The screams got louder and louder the closer to Mikey she got. There was no sign of the Karai bot but it could still be around, waiting. Then she heard screams and hysterical laughter mixed with sobbing. _

 

_ "Mikey-" April said, finally finding him. "Mikey it's okay! I'm here! I'm- oh god.." April covered her mouth. Mikey's arm was missing. _

 

_ Mikey's gaze was lost in the dark sky, his breathing turned erratic as the vital crimson lifesource ran freely on the ground making a big pool around the fallen turtle. _

 

_ "No! I won't let this happen!" April slapped Mikey before pulling off her shirt. She used it to bandage Mikey's arm in an attempt to stop the bleeding. "You stay with me, you hear!" _

 

_ Mikey trembled hard, his face paling by the second. He turned his unfocused eyes to her and smiled weakly.  _

 

_ "...h-hehe... hehee... kitten ...f-face bra?... F-for... real... realsies?" _

 

_ April smiled a little. Mikey was still Mikey. "Don't like it?" She said, trying to keep him talking. _

 

_ Mikey shivered. "...reminds... mind...s me... of Klunk... K-klu... Klunk... Klunk... poor b-baby. H-he... he..." _

 

_ "It's okay. It's okay." April said. "He loved you." April forced Mikey to stand. "We can't stay here Mikey." _

 

_ "I'm sleepy..." Mikey slurred a bit. _

 

_ "Don't you dare fall asleep on me!" April said, dragging him to the sewer. _

 

_ Mikey nodded feeling drowsier. "April... my arm... it hurts..." _

 

_ "I know sweetie..." April made sure to clench down on it. But she kept moving. By some miracle she got Mikey into sewers. _

 

_ They fell heavily on the cold, moist surface; April tried her best to keep Mikey away from the unsanitary waters. _

 

_ Apparently Mikey had forgotten about his lost arm for he continued to ask for it and complain about how badly it hurt. _

 

_ "Shh.. its okay we'll be at base soon. J-just hang on-" April said to Mikey. _

 

_ "Donnie... Donnie, I'm sorry... I'm... I'm sorry..." Mikey whispered, his eyes rolling back in his head. "... s-sorry... I... Don..." _

 

_ "MIkey!" _

 

\---

 

"Mikey, Mikey.. wake up." Raph shook his little brother. "You're just dreaming."

 

"...nnn... Donnie...sorry... I'm sorry..."

 

"Oh Mikey.." Raph whispered. He stroked Mikey's head softly. Mikey jolted awake, gasping for air as if he'd been drowning. Raph hugged him. "It's okay bro. I got cha."

 

"Raph? ... where... where are we? Where's April? There was a Karai bot, I-I ... w-we gotta-"

 

"Mikey.. that was 30 years ago. Shredder and Karai are dead. April's alive."

 

Now slowly coming back to his senses, Mikey looked at his surroundings. He was safe in his room with Raph... with Raph?

 

"... you... you stayed here?"

 

"I.. I didn't want to leave.."

 

Mikey sat up on the bed. "... that fucking nightmare again..."

 

Raph rubbed Mikey's shell. "Yeah, thought it might be."

 

Mikey absentmindedly touched what was left of his arm, the pain feeling more real than in his dream. Raph looked at it sadly. "Hey.. have.. have you thought about talking to this doctor when he arrives? He might know a way to give you an arm. Like, a non-robotic one.

 

Mikey nodded. "I have. It's worth a shot..."

 

"Yeah. You never know." Raph kept rubbing his shell.

 

"... I heard Angel convinced Leo to go see that doctor but only if..."

 

"I'm sure the doctor will be around for a while. If we tell Murto that you wanna see him too, then we don't have to disturb Leo's appointment."

 

"Yeah..." Mikey flopped back on the bed with a long sigh. "Why does Leo hate us so much?"

 

"I don't know.." Raph said. "I'm hoping if he gets his eyesight repaired, he'll come around. After all, he won't have a defensive against your 'sad-face' any more."

 

"That is if I can pull it off." Mikey chuckled.

 

"I'm sure you'll be able to after some practice." Raph smiled."Okay, lets get some more sleep. Its our turn to watch the kids tomorrow."

 

Mikey groaned. "Again? Dude, I love kids but I'm too old for babysitting"

 

"C'mon, get some sleep-" Raph said, pulling Mikey down with him and snuggling close

 

Mikey nuzzled Raph's neck as he tucked his head under his chin and churred softly. "We used to sleep like this when we were kids, remember?"

 

"Mm, yeah. Always loved the turtle-pile." Raph chuckled.

 

"Me too..."

 

Mikey heard Raph's rolling snores, meaning the older fell asleep. He smiled and closed his eyes following  his example.

 


	10. Chapter 10

A week or so later, Murto made good on his promise. The High Council had decided to take Earth under their protection. Considering now that the population of humans had dropped from nearly 7 billion to a few million, they were now considered an 'endangered species'.

 

Angel watched from the window of Shredder's tower as Utrom clean up crews helped make the city much better. "They're repairing a lot of the buildings. Apparently they're gonna issue people apartments and housing, since there's lots to go around." She explained to Leo, holding his hand.

 

They had come for their appointment, which wasn't for another hour. "What about the missing people and children? There's gotta be a way to reunite them with their families"

 

"They're gonna try their best." Angel said.

 

"Angel, I need to ask you a favor." Chaplin said.

 

"What is it?" Angel turned to Chaplin.

 

"Shredder's computer should have a database of family connections and who's survived." Chaplin said. "The Utroms have me busy doing other things. You don't supposed you could search for it while you wait for your appointment?"

 

"I could do that." Angel said. She tugged on Leo's hand, not wanting to be alone in the Tower.

 

Leo followed her like a puppy on a leash. This was the first time he'd been around Chaplin in 30 years and it was both surprising and worrying. It could be his paranoia but he did not trust Karai's second in command, however he couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy. Like him, he'd lost someone he cared for.

 

Angel began to try and sort out through the files. Took her half an hour to sort through everything. She frowned when she saw a file marked 'Pet Project'. It was a video file.

 

She shrugged and clicked it. It began to play, audio blaring so Leo could heard it. She instantly regretted it but couldn't look away.

 

\---

 

_ Raph was tied down in a way he couldn't get out of. Casey was tired by his hands, blood dripping down his body from a gash along his stomach. _

 

_ "Casey! Casey hang in there!" Raph said, struggling. "I promise! We'll get out-" _

 

_ "Oh Raphael." Shredder voice came. "You shouldn't make promises you can't keep." The Shredder wasn't even in armour. Just his Saki suit. He sharpened a small blade in his hand. _

 

_ "C-Casey, please, hang in there. K-keep talking-" Raph begged his best friend. _

 

_ "S-sure, YOU try talking with a... a f-fucking hole in your stomach!" _

 

_ Shredder just laughed. "Oh, don't worry, he shall have his own hole soon." He smirked. He had tried Raph so he was on all four, facing Casey. "But this one won't kill him, I have something else in mind." _

 

_ "W-what..?" _

 

_ "I have much bigger plans for you. You will be perfect bait for Donatello." Shredder said. "After all, I know you're his lover." _

 

_ "H-how.. I.." _

 

_ Shredder just laughed. "However, I shall have my fun. First of all-" He suddenly jabbed his knife into Raph's eye, pulling it out and cutting the nerves. _

 

_ Raph screamed. _

 

_ "RAPH!" Casey struggled against the straps that kept him captive. "YOU SICK FUCK, LEAVE HIM ALONE!" _

 

_ Raph let his head fall, shivering in shock. _

 

_ "If you are to be the perfect bait, you need to be trained." Shredder said. "And I always thought you'd make a good pet." He suddenly pressed his crotch up against Raph's backside and grinded. _

 

_ Raph's eye widened in shock. "No.. no.. a-anything but that! NO! PLEASE DON’T!" _

 

_ Casey was horrified, he knew what would happen next and there he was, unable to stop this monster. He kept struggling but the pain in his stomach was unbearable.  The blood loss weakened him greatly, focusing his vision in a single spot was getting harder by the second. _

 

_ Shredder pooled blood into his hand from Raph's face and rubbed it onto his hard cock. That was all the lube Raph got as the man-robot forced his artificial cock into Raph, pounding hard and fast at a speed a biological human couldn't do. _

 

_ Raph screamed, then sobbed. He begged. But nothing he could do stopped the Shredder. He cried out for his brothers, for Donnie, for Mikey. Most of all for his big brother Leo. _

 

_ Casey closed his eyes tightly, not wanting to see Raph being humiliated in such a horrible way. If he was going to die here, he didn't want his last memory to be of his best friend being savagely raped by Shredder. But the screams... nothing could shield him from the screams. Never in his life he'd heard such a pitiful and heartbreaking sound specially not from Raph. _

 

_ Raph opened his eyes, forgetting for a moment that Shredder was raping him. He saw the state of Casey and knew he wasn't going to make it. _

 

_ "I-I'm sorry C-Casey, t-this is all my fault!" Raph sobbed. _

 

_ "Shut up... just... just shut up!" Casey said through gritted teeth. "None of this is your fault, get that through your thick skull!" _

 

_ "C-Casey.. I l-love ya man- y-you'll always be my best friend." Casey saw Raph's eye dart to the side. _

 

_ Within Casey's retch was a torch. It could set the ropes alight. The shredder was so distracted right now it was their only chance. _

 

_ "G-gee Raph... n-not the best moment to get mushy on me!" Casey played along trying to reach for the torch. _

 

_ Raph managed to use the blood streaming from his face to worm his hand free enough to grab a bottle of oil the Shredder had been using to help sharpen his blade. He nearly dropped it as Shredder pounded more into him. He sobbed louder as he could feel himself being torn. _

 

_ 'Just a little further... just-' "NNHGHH!" There was that annoying pain again. _

 

_ Raph fiddled with the oil, gritting his teeth. He sprayed a line towards his ropes. The Shredder was so focused on pounding into Raph and spouting out how he was going to use Raph as a sex slave for years to come. _

 

_ Casey managed to tilt the torch just so some flames landed on the oiled ropes. It'd be just a matter of time and lots of luck. Raph bumped Shredder back. He snapped free of the ropes and used the oil to get some fire between them and Shredder. He then dashed over to Casey, trying to undo the chains. _

 

_ "C'mon! We gotta hurry!" Raph said, weakened by what had been done to him. _

 

_ Casey shook his head. "Run... you have to leave me here..." _

 

_ "NO! I'm not leaving you!" Raph said, desperately tugging more. _

 

_ For some reason, the chains gave in and Casey was free but too weak to leave by his own means. Raph tried to support Casey but he couldn't. His normally strong body unable to support him and Casey. "Casey.. please.. g-get up.." _

 

_ But Casey could see the Shredder, now in armour, heading towards them. _

 

_ "Raph, if you don't fucking leave me behind you'll be sorry! You hear me?!" Casey growled. _

 

_ Raph sobbed. "Casey.. I r-really do love ya. Y-your my best friend-" _

 

_ "I know now please leave!" Casey pushed him, grabbing his friend's sais. "SHREDDER! YOUR FIGHT'S WITH ME NOW!" _

 

_ Raph covered his mouth and sobbed running past Casey. He heard Casey yell to him to keep running and not look back. And that's what he did. _

 

\--

 

"I.. I think I'm gonna be sick.." Angel sobbed.

 

Leonardo rested a hand on her shoulder, soon he had Angel crying her heart out, her tears soaking his coat. 

 

Out of sight, out of mind- that's how the saying went or so he remembered. What he couldn't see couldn't affect him, what he didn't love meant little to nothing to him; that recording was just karma being represented in very grotesque way but nonetheless, it was karma.

 

"Let's get out of here" He said.

 

"Leonardo." Chaplin said "The doctor will see you now."

 

"Please L-Leo.. I d-don’t want us to h-have come here for nothing.." Angel said. "P-please talk to the doctor.."

 

Leo turned to where he'd heard Chaplin's voice. "Tell him I didn't show up. C'mon Angel"

 

"Leo. Please." Angel begged him. "Please!"

 

With a growl he pushed her away and walked out of the room. 

 

_ 'Out of sight, out of mind. Out of sight, out of mind...' _

 

He continued walking, pushing past utroms and staff repeating that mantra.

 


	11. Chapter 11

"Being in this tower weirds me out." Raph said, sitting with Mikey. It was hours after Leo's 'appointment' so they shouldn't see him.

 

"I don't know, it looks better without all the Foot soldiers" Mikey said trying to sound positive. "Although this place could use some curtains... maybe a skylight..."

 

"Could use with less Foot symbols." Raph grunted.

 

"Doctor will see you now." Mortu said, smiling at his old friends.

 

Raph stood and walked with Mikey into a makeshift hospital room.

 

"Love what you've done with the place, Mortu" Mikey said.

 

Mortu chuckled. "The good doctor can decorate with the best of them." He stepped side as another Utrom came closer. "Raphael, Michelangelo, this is Dr Zilx. He is one of the best Utrom doctors."

 

"Pleasure to meet you, gentlemen. I've been looking forward to work with you ever since Mortu informed me of your predicament" Zilx said.

 

"Honestly I didn't think it'd be necessary. I mean, I've lived like this for half my life. Got used to it pretty quick" Mikey said.

 

"What made you change your mind?" Zilx asked.

 

"... my brother." Mikey answered smiling at Raph.

 

Raph smiled back. "I figured it’s worth a shot. Same with Leo."

 

"Chaplin informed me Leo did turn up but left just before his appointment." Murto said sadly.

 

Raph ground his teeth. "Fucking stubborn bastard. I still say we should have sedated him."

 

"And I still say that would have been a bad idea." Mortu said. "Anyway, let us focus on Michelangelo. You want a purely biological replacement arm?"

 

"If it's possible" 

 

Zilx laughed. "Dear child, everything is possible thanks to science. Come this way"

 

Raph followed Mikey. "So.. you can like.. grow him a new arm and it work?"

 

"The process is more complex than that, Raphael, but yes we can grow it back." Zilx said. "We'll just need his DNA."

 

Mikey blinked. "... that's it? Just DNA and I'll have my arm back?"

 

"After a couple of months yes. Your DNA will be added to the same ooze used to mutate you and stem cells"

 

Raph grinned brightly. "Hear that Mikey! Just a few months!"

 

"Sounds great but do I have to carry that tube around for a couple of months or what?" 

 

"Not quite. You see, the stem cells will recreate a womb where your DNA will start forming the limb. We'll use different types of commands so the 'womb' forms an arm instead of a whole new being." Zlix explained. "Then once it's big enough, we'll transplant it back to you and your body won't notice the difference meaning we won't have to repeat the process."

 

Mikey listened to the doctor in awe, that's the kind of talk Don would've love to hear.

 

Raph thought it sounded like gross-sciency stuff. Definitely something Donnie would have loved. "Do you wanna do it Mike?"

 

"Yeah! When do we start?!"

 

"Right away if you're ready." Zilx said smiling at the turtle's enthusiasm.

 

Raph grinned. "Go on Mikey."

 

Zilx left with Mikey to the next room. "I will have to ask you to stay here and wait, Raphael. Don't worry, this won't take long"

 

Raph nodded, sitting back down. "Okay. Mikey, I'll be right here if you need me."

 

Mikey smiled brightly at Raph and joined Zilx into the next room, modified for medical procedures. Now Raph was left alone with Chaplin.

 

"Don't you want your eye replaced?" Chaplin asked.

 

Raph looked at him in shock. "I guess I haven't thought about it.." He looked at the floor. "I can live without an eye. All it does it make me a better shot. But Mikey needs his arm back. And Leo DEFINITELY needs his shell fixed and eyesight sorted. Out of the three of us, I got off easy."

 

"That doesn't mean you shouldn't get a replacement eye. Even if a glass one." Chaplin commented.

 

Raph shook his head and remained silent, waiting for Mikey. Raph smiled at Mikey once he saw the younger come out, some of his skin had been sampled on his other arm.

 

"You okay Mike?"

 

Mikey nodded. "Yup. Didn't hurt at all"

 

Raph put his arm around Mikey. "Let's go home and celebrate."

 

"Raphael, think about what I said." Chaplin said.

 

"You mean his eye? Dude, don't worry. I'll bring him here as soon as possible" Mikey said patting Chaplin's back.

 

Raph grumbled, but didn't go against the idea. He walked with Mikey out of the building and headed back to the base.

 

\----

 

Raph was very happy. He hummed in the shower as he washed. Mikey was going to get a new arm. A whole new biological arm. He couldn't believe it.

 

"Heard the good news" April said coming in with fresh towels.

 

"I know! Mikey's gonna have a new arm." Raph turned off the shower and dried himself. "Only a new months to wait."

 

"Sounds good to me" April smiled. "Too bad Leo refused the treatment"

 

Raph clutched the towel tightly. "Why? Why did he refuse treatment?"

 

April shrugged. "Beats me. Chaplin just said he was beyond pissed off"

 

"Right, that's it." Raph dried off and put his coat on. "I'm talking to him." He busted out of the bathroom, looking for his older brother.

 

"Where do you think you're going? We have to go to Chinatown." April said walking behind him.

 

"Sure, let me just talk to the idiot first." Raph said. "LEO! LEO!"

 

"Raph, he's not here! He left!"

 

"Where is he?!"

 

"I don't know. He disappears then shows up at unholy hours" April said, now clearly furious. "You know what? Forget about the mission. I'll go with the others"

 

Raph clenched his fists and waited for April to leave. He felt the same settled in and he punched the wall out of frustration. He then returned to his room, packing up his bag to try and look for Leo.

 

\--

 

"I thought Raph was coming with us." Ted said to Angel, loading his gun.

 

"April said.. said he went off to find Leo." Angel sighed.

 

"Damn, this is NOT gonna end well"

 

"No.." Angel sighed. She leaned over and kissed Ted softly. "Don't worry, it won't be long until we can rest. The Utroms are taking note of who worked for the Shredder and are wrangling them up."

 

"Sorry for the delay" April said joining them. "Had to make sure Leo wasn't around"

 

"Keeping them apart just makes things worse." Ted pointed out. 

 

"At least they won't kill each other"

 

"Yeah, b-but..." Angle covered her face, shaking badly. "W-we saw somthing.. a-and they need to talk about it.."

 

"Angel, we're going into a possibly Foot zone. I need you to focus." April said.

 

Angel nodded. "Okay, okay, I can focus." She got ready. Every time she thought she was going to be okay, she remembered the video.

 

"Love, I think you should sit this one down" Ted said, concerned. "We got enough guys and this place looks deserted anyway."

 

Angel grabbed his hand, shaking. "S-stay with me.. I d-don’t wanna lose you.."

 

"April... I'm sorry but-"

 

"- no need to explain. I understand" April said, smiling softly at them. "I can still count on you to holler if there's trouble, right?"

 

Ted nodded. "You got it, chief"

 

Angel watched April leave. Once they were alone, Angel burst out crying. She pressed her face against Ted's shoulder. "It w-was horrible.."

 

"Angel, love calm down... calm down..."

 

"W-we found a video on S-Shredder's computer. It was horrible. H-he RAPED Raph!"

 

"...come again?"

 

Angel took a couple of deep breaths. "There was a video on his computer. It was a recording of the point when C-Casey died.. a-as Casey was dying, Shredder tied Raph down, removed his eye and r-raped him.."

 

Ted had to take a moment to digest everything Angel was blurting out. "It... It doesn't make sense. I mean if he was a rape victim a lot of things would be different!"

 

Angel nodded. "Y-yeah.." She covered her face. "I-it was horrible.. Raph just kept screaming for his brothers to help him.."

 

"... damn... does anyone else know about this?"

 

"L-Leo.. I heard it all." Angel said. "He was there when I found the video. I was looking for lists of the dead kept by Shredder.."

 

"Leo of all turtles... great..." Ted rubbed his temples sighing. "Did he say something?"

 

"S-something about.. unseen things. He was mumbling and then refused to have his appointment. Up until then he was willing to talk to doctor.."

 

Ted could now connect some of the dots and by the looks of it, that discovery could've might as well mess up the rest of Leonardo's life. 

 

"He needs an intervention"

 

"Leo or Raph?" Angel asked. "Both need to talk we each other."

 

"I was thinking Leo but when you put it that way-" 

 

"RETREAT! EVERYONE, RETREAT!" 

 

Ted prepared his gun and pushed Angel behind him. "Seems like things didn't go as planned"

 

"Keep moving!" Angel said,helping people who were retreating. "April! What happened?"

 

"It was an ambush! They knew we were coming!"

 

Ted ushered people to fall back, shooting a couple of ninja how tried to cross the limit line.

 

Angel picked up her gun, helping keep the Ninja at bay. "This is for my family!" She did a couple of headshots.

 

"Guys, they got grenades!" April alerted them. 

 

Ted grabbed Angel's arm rather roughly and ran to safety.

 

As Angel ran, she felt something strike her in the shoulder. She didn't even hear the gunshot or the pain. She ignored it, forcing her boyfriend to keep running in front of her.

 

April used her supply of amo to keep the resisting ninja at bay; there were a few left but they had the better weapons and the most skill. 

 

"Dammit, they just keep coming!"

 

Let's not waste amo, we have to go back to our base!" Ted said, shielding Angel. Then he noticed her wound. "Fuck, one of them got you"

 

They heard a choking sound coming from one of the rooftops on the left and then saw a man falling, followed by his head.

 

April squinted. "... Leo?"

 

"Leo's here?!" Ted turned to where April was looking at.

 

"Leo..." Angel mumbled. She closed her eyes, leaning against Ted.

 

"Angel? Angel, c'mon don't close your eyes!" Ted panicked.

 

"Take her to the base, use that bike!" April ordered. 

 

"What about you?"

 

"Just go!"

 

"Don't worry, I got her back." Raph said, running past Ted. "Tale Angel to safety, or Leo'll have your head!"

 

Ted nodded and picked Angel carefully. "Stay awake, love. Please"

 

April and the higher ranker rebels stayed to control the elite survivors. "Thought you weren't coming" She said.

 

"I heard the distress signal over the radio. There's no way I'd let something like a feud kill any more family." Raph said.

 

"Mikey's with the kids right?" April asked, shooting a couple of ninjas in the legs.

 

"Yes. He's making sure no one gets to them." Raph said, killing a couple of ninja outright. He refuse to let them live after they hurt Angel. "Looks like Leo's taking care of some of the others."

 

"I have no idea how he got the signal but I'm glad he did" April dodged the incoming throwing knifes. "We can't keep it up like this, Raph. We have to leave"

 

"You go first." Raph said, "I'll cover you." He blocked everything from headed April's way.

 

"No funny tricks, Raphael! I want you back at the base!" April yelled and ran to the next building.

 

Raph looked up to Leo for a moment. He would stay as long as Leo would. He wouldn't leave Leo behind again.

 

More heads fell as well as limbs; whoever that crossed Leo's way was in for a swift but gruesome death. His katana blade was red with all the blood of his enemies but somehow it wasn't enough. 

It was never enough.

 

"Leo, that's enough." Came Raph's voice. "They're all dead." He said after half an hour of fighting.

 

Leo stopped not because of Raph, he’d just run out of toys to play with. He stabbed the severed head of a ninja with an angry growl.

 

"Feel better now?"

 

"Not quite."

 

"Leo." Raph said, pressing his foot against one of the head. "Will it ever be enough?"

 

"... no" Leo retrieved his sword. "Shredder got off easy. They can thank his boss for what's coming to them"

 

"Is that why you didn't see the doc? Because you wanna keep torturing yourself until all of Shredder men are dead?" Raph said.

 

Leo didn't answer. He kept his back to Raph so he couldn't see him forcing air inside of his lungs. The infection wasn't going away this time apparently.

 

"Go home, Raphael. They're waiting for you"

 

"They're waiting for you too." Raph said. "More than me. I know Angel will wanna see you when she wakes up."

 

"You can't keep bribing me with-" The words died in Leo's mouth. 

 

Before Raph could move, Leo turned to face him, sword in hand and thrust over his brother's shoulder barely missing his skin.

 

Raph blinked, unsure of what just happened. The sound of a body falling behind Raph was all the explanation he needed.

 

Raph looked at him, relaxing. "Even blind and sick you're still a better Ninja than I'll ever me."

 

"Flattering won't get you anywhere" Leo said, walking towards the corpse. He poked at it a couple of times before looting the ninja.

 

"Leo.. why don't you talk to the doctor..." Raph said. "Seriously, I mean.. why."

 

"I don't need him" Leo said calmly.

 

"Leo, we all get it. You're an amazing ninja while blind. But this isn't about need any more. This is about want. What we want. For each other and ourselves. We have our choices back. Mikey's getting his arm back." Raph said. "Don't you want to be able to see again?"

 

"What would that change, Raphael? I don't need my eyes to know this place isn't home anymore. I don't need my eyes to know our loved ones are dead and certainly I don't need them to see what's left of our so called 'family'..." Leo spat the last word, hating the sound of it.

 

Raph flinched at that last word. "Leo, the world's already changing. Some areas of the city look like it used to. Heck, some of it looks even better than before. And what about the family to come? I mean.. what is Angel has a kid. Don't cha wanna see your nephew's face?"

 

With the corpse now free from all valuables, Leo had nothing else that kept him there anymore. He was getting tired of hearing the same thing and of people using Angel as an excuse and shield. He put the last of the stolen shurikens in his pocket and stood up.

 

"Leo." Raph said. "What would it take to make you change your mind?"

 

Without a hurry Leo walked away using his katana as a walking stick, clearing his path from heads and limbs. Raph followed behind him. This time not saying anything- just observing.

 

The blind warrior was very much aware of his brother's presence, however he remained silent. If Raphael wanted to waste his time following him like a lost puppy then fine by him.

 

Raph kept up as best as possible. It made him realise how out of shape he was. With only one eye sometimes it was hard to judge the distance or position of things. However, years of being a ninja meant he was able to dodge things at the last secound.

 

There were a few kids that recognized the brothers but went to greet Leo first. In return, he would ruffle their hair and offer some small knives for them to use in case they would need to defend themselves.

 

Raph smiled. Years ago handing out small weapons to kids would have considered a horrible thing to do. Now it was vital to their survival. Any kids, especially girls, were turned into alarm robots.

 

They continued making random stops along the way, apparently all that area knew Leo very well and people there treated him like some kind of hero. He gently declined the food offerings thanking them for the thoughtful gesture and kept walking, promising them next time he would be joining them for diner.

 

Hours of walking took the brothers back to April's base. Apparently tonight he would be staying there. Raph raised an eyebrow. He never knew what his older brother did when he went off. Now he had some kinda idea. He protected people.

 

Raph felt shame in his chest. He had mostly gotten drunk.

 

Leo greeted some of the rebels who informed him of Angel's condition. She just had a minor surgery to remove the bullet in her shoulder but other than that, she was ok. Raph sighed with relief when he heard it. That was good news. Other than that he didn't say anything else. He wanted to, but he didn't want Leo to snap at him again.

 

From the infirmary Leo could hear Ted and Angel talking.

 

"I'm putting my foot down this time, babe. There's no way I'm letting you go on another mission!"

 

"It’s just a bullet to the shoulder! I'm fine! It didn't even hit anything important." Angel retorted.

 

"But what if next time it gets you someplace else, huh? What if it gets it in the stomach or the head! The head, Angel!"

 

"What about you then!" Angel snapped. "Am I supposed to just sit at home like a good partner while my man is out there fighting?!"

 

"Don't put words in my mouth, Angel"

 

"She's right, you know?" Leo intervened.

 

Raph followed in behind Leo. "I don't know what happened, but both of you seem too emotionally unable to go out on missions. With the Utroms helping it'll be okay if your two take a break."

 

"We still have a wedding to plan, love. Please, just reconsider"

 

"Fine." Angel said. "But only if you stay too. As Raph says, there's enough Utrom helping." She looked over to Raph and gave him a small, sad smile. "How.. how are you doing Raph?"

 

Raph blinked, confused by the sudden topic shift. "I'm.. I'm fine." Raph grunted. "After all, I didn't get shot. Concentrate on ya self Angel."

 

"I still have to check up on some friends but I'm glad to know you're feeling better, Angel." Leo said before turning to the exit.

 

Raph hesitated for a moment. He was torn between keeping an eye on Ted and Angel and following Leo. Or even seeing how Mikey was.

 

"Let him go, man." Ted said. "Remember what we talked about"

 

"Yeah, yeah, okay-" Raph turned to look at Ted. For a moment he could have sworn he saw pity in Ted's eyes. Pity aimed at him. Like Ted knew something he didn't before. Raph frowned. "What?"

 

"... hmm?"

 

Raph felt a rush of unexplained anger. "Why ya lookin’ at me like that? Like I'm some sort of kicked puppy."

 

"It's... it's nothing, man. You're just tired..."

 

Raph gritted his teeth. There were times he hated how much Ted looked like Casey, and this was one of them. Something about that look was bringing horrific memories back.

 

"Raph, all Ted is saying is you did just fight a whole army of Ninja and follow Leo around. Maybe you should have a rest." Angel said, sensing Raph's irritation.

 

"Yeah?! Well, maybe what I really need is a fucking drink!" Raph snapped, then turned away. He was shaking with the need of numbing  drunkenness.

 

"I better follow  him in case he does something stupid" Ted said.

 

Angel nodded. "Just be careful. I like your nose not to be even more broken, so keep your guard up." She kissed his cheek.

 

"C'mon babe, Raph wouldn't do such a thing"

 

"Man, sometimes you sound like you don't know Raph at all." Angel chuckled a little and settled down to sleep.

 


	12. Chapter 12

Raph had gone straight to the supply closet where they kept the alcohol. It was heavily bolted with a large lock. However, he was shaking too much to pick it. He couldn't just pull the lock off or anything else. There was no way this door would open.

In the end he just began to beat his head against the metal door.

"You done, pal?"

"I j-just need a drink..." Raph said, his face pressed against the metal door. "I j-just need to numb the pain.."

"The way I see it, that's going to cause more pain and not just to you" Ted said.

"I.. I j-just wanna see Casey again.." Raph couldn't stop the tears rolling down his face.

"Raph, I get it, you're suffering but do you really think Casey would want to see you like that again? Jumping in and out your grave like it's some sort of game?"

Raph clenched his fists. "You know d-don’t you... y-you know what happened.."

Ted sighed heavily, there was no point in hiding the truth when it was so painfully obvious, however he could still disguise it to spare Raph's dignity. With caution, he approached Raph and rested a hand on his shoulder. 

"No one but Angel and me knows... and I know a simple 'sorry' won't fix things but... what he did to you, it's just..."

"H-how did you find out?" Raph said, but he didn't try to push Ted off. "D-did Mikey tell ya? He's the only one I've t-told.."

"... Angel found Shredder's tapes"

"Fuck!" Raph banged his fist against the door. "I d-didn't know.. I s-should've guessed." He took a deep breath. "O-okay.. okay.." He took a deep breath. "L-let's go to the roof. I need some fresh air."

On their way out they saw Mikey and April having dinner with the high ranked rebels, probably planning ways of getting rid of the last Foot Ninja. Ted urged Raph to keep walking, the last thing he needed now was more worries.

Raph looked at they went past but did follow Ted to the roof. He sat on the mattress and tried to relaxe. There was silence for a few minutes before Raph spoke.

"I'm... kinda glad ya know. It’s been hard to.. to keep it a secret." Raph said

"It's not a very pleasant secret. I understand why you didn't say a thing before."

"It.. it wasn't what he did.. it was what he made me do.." Raph then began to explain better. "He wanted to keep me alive. He somehow knew about me and Donnie and he wanted to use me and train me to b-become a trap for Donnie.. I j-just." He covered his eyes. "I w-was so scared. T-that why I ran away. Casey told me to run and not look back and that’s what I did. E-even when my brother needed me."

"Fear took over your mind, I can understand that" Ted said. "Not even a highly trained ninja can overcome it"

Raph sighed. "I hope one day Leo can forgive me, but no matter what Shredder did to me, it doesn't excuse what I did."

"Have you ever tried talking to him about that day? Tell him your version of the story"

"He just shuts down whenever I try to talk to him about anything, let alone that day." Raph said. "He just hates me so much. I've tried so hard since the Shredder died and every time he's shot me down and blamed me."

"Well, you did blame him for your father's death" Ted pointed out. "Maybe he never got over that"

Raph sighed. "Yeah. Yeah I did."

"... what really happened that day? When you lost Splinter, I mean"

"Splinter.. Splinter told us to run. And Leo forced us to.." Raph said, rubbing his face. "M-Maybe we c-could of.. of stayed together we could have all gotten out together."

"Or you could've died." Ted replied. "I'm not trying to take sides, Raph, but you didn't see what he saw. Leo is not a reckless leader or at least wasn't. He must have done what he did for a reason"

Raph nodded a little. "I suppose you're right.." He lay on his shell. "I mean, if we all died then a lot more people would have died.. and Shredder probably wouldn't be dead now."

"And I wouldn't have met Angel" Ted added. "You see, even though things look shitty at the beginning, the results afterwards are what matter"

"I.. I guess Splinter would have wanted to go down fighting to protect us anyway." Raph mumbled.

"Same goes for your friend Casey. The way April describes him makes him look like the kind of warrior your father was only a bit reckless. No offense."

"He was a complete and utter knucklehead." Raph couldn't help but smirk a little. "And a great guy."

Ted looked at the sky and smiled. "I don't think I've told you this but I had a brother back in good old Philadelphia."

"Really? What.. what happened to him?" Raph asked.

"So quick to get to the point, aren't we?" Ted chuckled. "Oh well, I guess backstories can get pretty boring after a while"

"Hey, if you wanna tell me, then tell me. I'm willing to listen." Raph smiled at Ted.

"Alright, alright. We were actually twins, he was the eldest for like... uh... 2 or 3 minutes. We were really close but we did fight a lot, him being the reason why I broke my nose at 9. He was sorry, though"

"I think you should be thankful as I know Angel loves your broken nose." Raph said

"I was so handsome before! Curse you Eddie!" Ted whined mockingly raising his fist in the air. "Anyway, as you noticed he was the fighter. Pretty damn good one too. I was the nerdy kid at school, just a couple of friends, but never got bullied. No sir, not a single day in my life. You know why? Cuz nobody messes with the quarterback's bro, that's why!" Ted laughed to himself until his smile began to waver. "... and then... Shredder happened..."

Raph stood up and pulled his best friend close, hugging him. "He's gone now. The Shredder can't kill any more of our friends and family."

Ted nodded. The knot in his throat making it hard to swallow. "I know... I like to think he went down fighting"

"He did. He went down with Honor." Raph said

Ted smiled, wiping a stray tear off his cheek rather roughly. "He'd kick my ass if he saw me like this. 'Cryin' s for pussies', he'd say"

"Bet he's watching right now, wishing he could." Raph rubbed Ted on the back.

Ted laughed harder, punching Raph in the arm. "You're an ass!"

Raph grinned. He then pulled back and let the grin slip a little. "Okay dude, I get what ya sayin’. Maybe I should try to be more forgiving to Leo for what happened."

"I didn't say anything" Ted looked away innocently. "And you have no witnesses, you can't sue me"

Raph snorted. He patted Ted on the back. "You're great friend."

"Aww, you're gonna make me cry again"

Raph punch Ted in the arm affectionately. "C'mon, we're gonna be a bunch of crying saps if we keep talking about this.."

"Wanna head inside and eat something?"

"Definitely." Raph said. "And for once I don't crave alcohol.."

Ted patted him on the shell. "We're making some progress here. Come tomorrow for another session and make sure to sleep with your cuddle buddy and drink lots of water. It cleanses the soul and your kidneys"

"You'll never not be a therapist." Raph chuckled. He smiled. "Thanks man."

"Anytime. I'll accept my payment as an extra slice of pizza tonight"

Raph snorted. "You can have a whole fucking pizza if you want. I'll even make it."

"Yeeeaaahh... no. No, leave that to Mikey. I want to live, thank you very much" Ted joked. He had to duck to dodge Raph's fist. "Hey! I was just kidding, bro!"

Raph snorted. "C'mon, let's eat before you really stick your foot in your mouth."


	13. Chapter 13

Since their first encounter with the remaining Foot Ninja, April continued to receive emergency calls and reports about a possible invasion. The patrol squads had to double their efforts to keep citizens safe and scavenge as much weapons and medicine as they could; it felt like war all over again.

"This is ridiculous!" Raph grunted, standing with Mikey. "Even with the Utroms this is difficult.

“Well, what did you expect? Not everything was going to be easy peasy, bro. In fact, we were lucky to enjoy that much peace for a while"

Raph gritted his teeth. "H-havent we been through enough already.."

"Apparently not." Mikey said, checking over the map again. "Good news is Shredder is not bossing them around anymore so they won't be as organized. The perfect target for an ambush as April would say."

Raph nodded. "Let’s just hope it works this time."

"Alright so, I have to go north... I think you'll be going with Nelson and Craig this time. April asked Ted to stay in case Angel wants to sneak out"

"April thinks of everything." Raph nodded to Mikey. "Okay, I'll be headed over to them. Radio if you need anything." He snuck off.

Mikey watched Raph go from his binoculars. Raph had been getting so much better recently. He knew Ted had a lot to do with it. He'd have to find a way to thank him,

The radio he carried in his belt buzzed. "Mikey, Mikey you there?" It was one of April's soldiers.

"Yeah, I'm here." Mikey answered. "What is it?"

"We have a situation here. You know where the old Barnes and Noble was, right? Meet us there and don't let them see you"

"Alright." Mikey said, heading over there. He was soon near the old ruined book shop. There was no one in sight but of course they could be hiding, both his comrades and the enemy. Mikey rested his hand on his gun, sticking to the shadows. He picked up his radio and spoke into it. "Hey, where are you?"

"... o...v.... ba.... an... recep..."

"Sorry, can you repeat that?"

The radio buzzed and the same message came out of it. Clearly, his comrades' radio was busted. Mikey rolled his eyes and held his gun close. He had no idea where they were or what they wanted. So until he could find out, he'd hide. He held up his radio, hoping the message would go through. "Sorry, your radio's busted.. I cannot understand what you were trying to say."

He heard a bird call, one that belonged to the rebels from the east part of the city. Mikey looked around and noticed a hand waving a yellow cloth.

Mikey looked around before heading up there as quickly and as unseen as possible. He was welcomed by a small group of rebels, one of them laying on the ground, his breathing erratic. 

"Thanks for coming, man. One of our guys was shot"

"Where was he shot." Mikey said, removing his first aid kit to help.

"Shoulder, leg, thought they got him in the stomach but the bullet just grazed it"

Mikey began to help with removing the bullets and bandaging the human as best he could, getting the humans to help.

He then pulled out his radio. "This is a general call for help. A group here near the old Barns and Nobles have been attacked and need to be extracted."

"Don't even bother, this place is surrounded." A guy with an eyepatch said. "Bringing troops here is exactly what they want us to do"

Mikey sighed. He pulled out the radio. "Scratch that. Place is surrounded and is an ambush." He looked at them. "We need to get into the sewers."

"Nearest one I found is across the street and we have no fucking idea where those assholes are hidden"

"I could go check, I'm the fastest" A young rebel offered. 

"Are you crazy, son? Look what they did to Tom!" Another replied. "We need a plan that works"

"Have you checked whats inside this building?" Mikey said. "There might be an underground tunnel. Like a maintenance shaft to the sewers."

"That's where the fucker that shot Tom was hiding. We couldn't kill him so he might be there still"

There was a choked sound coming from the maintenance room. The door opened and a dead body slumped heavily on the ground.

"Uh... not anymore, he ain't" The young rebel said. 

The eyepatch guy squinted to see who was standing in the shadows. "Leonardo? Damn son, what a way to give an old man a heart attack!"

"The way you're talking, I could hear you from miles away." Leo said coming out of the room.

"Hey Leo." Mikey said. "Glad ya did though. Need ya help to get these guys out."

"Follow me and be quiet" Leo said, kicking the body away from the entrance.

Mikey hauled the hurt human onto his shell. He followed behind Leo and the group. On the way downstairs, Leo heard hurried steps; the ninjas had noticed their escape. 

"Hurry, they're getting closer. I'll hold them off."

"I'll be back-" Mikey said. He rushed down to the maintenance shaft in the building. He passed the human over. "Keep going straight and turn right and keep moving. You'll soon find your way home."

Before any of them to could anything. He headed up to where Leo had been. "Michelangelo? What are you doing here? You have to get out!" Leo said, frowning.

"I'm here to make sure you don't do anything stupid." Mikey said, shooting a couple of ninja in the head.

"I think you're talking about your lover, Michelangelo" Leo replied, blocking another ninja's shuriken.

Mikey packed away his gun when it ran out of bullets. He began to use his own shuriken. "What the fuck is that ment to mean?"

"Nothing. Keep fighting, I can't cover your ass all the time." Leo replied. "Then again, you have someone to do that already."

Mikey growled as he helped take out some more of Ninja, making sure Leo kept himself safe. "If you have a problem with me and Raph spending time together than you should say!"

Leo pulled a handful of smoke pellets and threw them on the floor, blinding the enemy. Then he grabbed Mikey's hand and made a run to the maintenance room.

Soon, Mikey and Leo were in the sewers. They walked for a while. Mikey couldn't stay it anymore. He punched Leo in the arm. "What the fuck is your problem!?"

"One would think you would be more grateful, after all I did save your life" Leo said calmly.

"Leo, you know that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about those snide comments aimed at the fact Raph finally treating me like I'm a person rather than a fuck toy!"

"You didn't seem to mind in the past. What changed? Did he bring you dead roses and breakfast in bed?"

"It's more romance then you've ever done!" Mikey snapped.

Leo snorted. "Please, like you even cared for that. All you wanted as a good lay, just like when we were teens."

Mikey shook with anger and hurt. "Is that why you're saying this? Because you're no longer getting any? You can't get your dick wet because someone's being nice to me?"

Leo slammed him against the wall so fast Mikey didn't see him coming. "No. I'm saying this because you don't fucking deserve any of that."

Mikey couldn't absorb what Leo had just say at first. Once he did, he shook. "I-Is that what this is about? You t-think none of us deserve happiness? J-just cause you enjoy torturing yourself doesn't mean we should!"

"You, little slut, are the reason everything went to hell." Leo hissed. "You are the reason why I hated Raph all those years and the reason I can't go back to what we were!"

"W-what are you t-talking about Leo?" Mikey said, his shaking only getting worse. "I d-don’t understand.."

"You knew what happened that night, what REALLY happened that night. And you kept it from me!" Leo unsheathed his sword and pressed it against Mikey's neck, keeping him in place. "Tell me something, little brother, do you know what it feels to feel powerless? Unable to stop someone from hurting you?" 

While he talked, calloused hands caressed Mikey's thighs rather roughly.

"Leo, I lost my arm." Mikey said. "Of course I know how that feels." He didn't stop his brother. Mainly because he knew Leo could, and would slit his throat if he struggled

Leo let out a forced laugh. "Oh no, that's a different kind of pain. You don't even imagine what it is to be under your enemy's claws, screaming and begging for someone to make the pain stop." He pressed his knee between Mikey's legs parting them.

"Yes! Alright! I suspected!" Mikey said, trying to force his legs closed. "Raph had said things while drunk that m-made me think- that the Shredder- B-but I didn't know 100% till last week!" He growled. "And it was never my place to tell you!"

"I was your LEADER!" Leo growled, digging his nails into Mikey's skin. "You were supposed to respond to ME!" His hand dove between Mikey's legs and pulled at his tail hard. "My brother, my second in command, needed me and you fucking kept it a secret?!"

Mikey shook, wincing. "A-Are you sure you would have been there for him?! You were so fixated that he had abandoned you that I doubted it would make a difference to you!"

"It wasn't your place to make that decision!" Leo pressed his sword harder, drawing blood.

"So you're gonna rape me to make it even?" Mikey spat. "Or do you just wanna be the next Shredder?!"

Leo's blind eyes widened out of pure reflex; he pulled his hand away, preparing himself to slap Mikey across the face. 

"You fucking little-"

Mikey braced himself for the slap. Nearby explosions distracted Leo. He straightened up and pulled Mikey with him. 

"Shit, they found us!"

"Let’s get moving before they catch up to us." Mikey grabbed Leo's hand, leading him away as best he could, but they were just not fast enough.

"THEY'RE HERE! GET THEM!"

Leo could hear the soldiers right behind them and he knew they wouldn't make it in time to the next exit. He let go of Mikey and prepared himself to fight.

"Leo!" Mikey said, skidding to a halt and turning to try and tried to go back.

"No, you have to leave! They can't get both of us, I won't let them!"

"They can't take three of us!" Raph said, running over. "Tom said you guys saved them and you should have been back by now!"

"Raph!" Mikey said happily.

"For fuck's sake, DOES ANYONE HERE EVER LISTENS TO ME ANYMORE?!" Leo yelled furiously. "I SAID GET OUT!"

"I already abandoned you once Leo." Raph said. "I'm not doing it again," He toss Mikey more ammo. Mikey reloaded and began to help Leo take out Ninja. Raph ran over, helping also.

The amount of sounds and voices on that narrow space confused Leo. He wasn't too sure where to aim and what to hit and soon, the soldiers noticed. Another problem was his infected shell. The reason he didn't stick around during a fight for more than a certain amount of time was because the infection had gotten so much worse he couldn't breathe as well and he'd been fighting for longer than he estimated.

They were nearly done with them, but before every opponent was knocked out or kill one ran to Leo. For Raph and Mikey it was like watching in slow motion as their brother was stabbed.

Only a gasp of air came from the blind warrior as the sword went through him. He fell on his knees, the weapon still imbedded in his body and in the middle of his golden plastron a slowly growing stream of blood tainted it red.

The brothers didn't have time to rush to their brother's side, the rest of the elite team was there already. They were surrounded and by the looks of it, none of them would make it out alive this time.

"If we're going down.. we're going down fighting..." Raph said before roaring with anger. He forced himself into the humans, body checking some of them. Mikey picked up one of the sword from the dead ninja and sliced what he could retch- fingers, arms, legs, heads-

The gunfire that came next was a surprise to everyone as well as the soldiers that executed Foot ninja and spared the turtles. Raph took the chance to go by Leo's side, kneeling and keeping him close. Mikey stood between them and the soldiers.

"DEADLY FORCE IS AUTHORIZED! FOOT NINJA ONLY! GO, GO GO!"

More soldiers came to the brother's aid; most of them used the same ninja tactics as them and other techniques the turtles had only seen their Master use before. Raph clung onto Leo's hand as Leo was taken away on a stretcher. Mikey stayed close by too, refusing to be left behind.

"Who are you? Whats going on?" Mikey said to the soldiers.

"We're here to help you" The female soldier said before reporting to her superiors.

Raph stroked Leo's head as they were moved around. Raph kinda blanked out what was going on, focused on Leo. "It's gonna be okay. J-just stay alive.." Leo looked more dead than alive, his face paled and his body was cooling down too fast. 

"We're going to lose him!" The medic soldier said to his partner. They hurried to the surface, leaving Raph behind.

"NO! I'm not abandoning him this time!" Raph cried out, hurrying after after the soldiers.

"Raph!" Mikey said, chasing after him.

Outside, more soldiers roamed the streets cleaning them from traps, mines and dead bodies.

A man dressed in black approached one of the soldiers. "What are the casualties?" 

"None of ours perished, sir. Most of Sadao's ninja are finished but we know a few escaped"

"And the turtles?"

"One of them is in critical condition. The other two are safe"

"LEO!" Raph said, struggling against some soldiers who were trying to keep him away. But then his eyes fell on the man in a black suit. A man he hadn't seen in years and assume dead.

"B-Bishop..?" Raph said, He then struggled more. "DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH MY BROTHER!"

"Raphael, it's been a while" Bishop greeted him. "Glad to know you made it out alive"

Mikey stumbled over too, seeing the human. "Bishop?! B-but.. but.." he then got angry. "Where have you been?!"

"Yeah! Your whole thing was about stopping Aliens from trashing earth and that's EXACTLY what happened!" Raph added.

"Before I bore you to death with the details of my life these past 30 years, there's someone you must meet"

Raph just growled at Bishop until Mikey grabbed Raph's arm and gasped. Raph's eye shifted to someone he never thought he'd see again.

"D... Donnie...?"

"Gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to my associate" Bishop said, welcoming the purple clad turtle. 

He'd aged and he had more battle scars than the three of them together, however that shy smile and gentle eyes hadn't changed a bit 30 years later. 

"Hi guys" Don said, his voice deeper yet still soft.

The sudden rush of emotions was too much for Raph. It was like his emotions were ripping him apart as he saw HIS Donnie. Not a Donnie from another dimension, but HIS Donnie. The one he fell in love with and thought dead.

Where had he been? What had happened? Why didn't he contact them ealier? Why hadn't he help?! Why- why-WHY-

Raph's eye rolled into the back of his head as he slumped to the floor, out cold.

Mikey wasn't much better. He was shaking badly, unable to process what he was seeing.

"I didn't know your brother was so easy to impress, Donatello" Bishop said, gesturing two more soldiers to take Raph to his base.

Ignoring Bishop, Don walked towards Mikey. "Mikey... it's me..."

Mikey's eyes focused on Donnie's face. Half an hour ago Leo was ready to rape him. Now Donnie was standing in front of him. He began to cry, feeling like a stupid kid again but he couldn't hold it back.

Don approached him carefully. "Mikey, baby bro, it's ok. It's ok, I'm here now..."

"WHERE WERE YOU?!" Mikey snapped suddenly. He rubbed his face desperately. "A-all this time! All this time you were alive!"

"Mikey, calm down. I'll explain everything but we need to get moving now."

Mikey couldn't resist though. He hugged Donnie close and sobbed onto his shoulder.

Don hugged him back tightly, stroking his brother's head affectionately. "I missed you so much... I missed you all..."

"I m-missed you too.. w-well all missed you. W-we got so fucked up w-without you.." He shivered. "J-just.. just d-don’t be alone with Leo.." He sobbed.

Don nodded, not understanding the reason why Mikey's said that last bit. "C'mon, we're going to my base"

"You mean MY base" Bishop said, walking past them.

"Fuck off, John"

That earned a little chuckle from Mikey. But Mikey didn't say much more. He followed Donnie into a vehicle. He sat in one of the seats and curled up, shivering from everything that had happened.


	14. Chapter 14

"Still no news from them?"

 

"No Ma'am, it's like they just vanished" 

 

April rubbed her face and sighed. It'd been hours since she got the last report from the turtles. 

 

"Go back to your station and inform me as soon as you get news from them"

 

The rebel saluted her and went back to his post.

 

"All they were able to find if their weapons and a lot of blood.." Angel said, coming in despite needing to rest. "What are we going to do.."

 

"They're not dead" April said, sitting on a worn out couch. "They're not dead, I refuse to believe it!"

 

Angel sat down with her. "I don't think they are either. They've done things like this before. It.. it doesn't feel like they're dead.."

 

"... you don't think they... they just left us, do you?"

 

Angel shook her head. "No. I think they've just been.. forced somewhere and couldn't make contact back. Again, that's happened before.."

 

April nodded. "I suppose you're right. It just terrifies me when it happens"

 

Angel rested back more, worn out from his surgery. "Still, if they're late for my wedding I will kick their asses."

 

That got a small smile out of the rebel leader. "They wouldn't do that to you"

 

"They better no-" Angel started when an alarm went off.

 

The computers were being hacked. Before Angel could react, all the screens in the base- including the one in front of her and April- had Bishop's face on them.

 

"Agent Bishop?! I... I thought he was dead!"

 

"Greetings rebels. Do not worry, I mean you no harm. Infact, my men and I will finally join your cause and tidy up the last of Shredder men and help the Utrom with the recovery efforts."

 

Angel scoffed. "Yeah, wait until we've defeated the Shredder to help." She mumbled under her breath.

 

"I also wish to tell you we are treating the turtles after their near death in an ambush. You will see them once they are able to survive without treatment." Bishop said. As quickly as he came, the image of Bishop disappeared.

 

"Wait, wait, wait!" April tried to find the source of the message without results. "FUCK!"

 

"Well.. this is going to make things more interesting.." Angel mumbled, wondering what the fuck they were meant to do next.

 

\--

 

Darkness. Pain. Voices. A cold rush of air then comfortable warmth.

 

"More blood! He needs more..."

 

_ '...dude, even Bowser could turn into a cat! Why shouldn't we?...' _

 

"Check his vitals..."

 

_ '...Leo, you have to see this! My ecologic generator works!...' _

 

"Gauze and more epoxy glue! Stat!..."

 

_ '...Don't be such a wuss, it's just beer. It won't kill ya...' _

 

"Fuck, we're losing him again!..."

 

_ 'My son..' _

 

"Leo! Leo don't you dare leave us!" Came Raph's voice. But this one didn't seem like his memory. "P-please! Don't leave me!"

 

_ 'Do you not hear your brother calling you, my child?' _

 

"Leo! Leo! I'm not gonna leave you this time!" Raph voice filtered through.

 

_ "My child, it is not your time. You cannot leave your brother yet." _ Splinter spoke softly to Leo.  _ "You have to fix the problems between all four of you before you can pass into the world I am in, or it will haunt you forever." _

 

_ 'But what if things can't be solved? I've already hurt them so much... father, please, let me go with you!' _

 

"CLEAR!"

 

_ "No my son. It's not time yet. Your brothers are trying so desperately to retch out for you." _ Splinter said softly.  _ "They have this whole time. I'm afraid your blindness didn't just affect your eyes, but your soul. Please try my son. Please, for me. For your brothers. For yourself-" His voice became fainter. _

 

_ 'Father?... no... NO, FATHER! FATHER PLEASE!' _

 

"CLEAR!"

 

"Leo! Leo! Breath your fucking asshole!" Raph slapped him across the face.

 

_ "We'll have forever to be together." _ Splinter said.  _ "But your brothers need you now. Live life my son, and forgive yourself.” _

 

"Please, control yourself sir! This isn't helping you brother!"

 

"Wait... he's stabilizing!"

 

The blind warrior's breathing settled down to a normal rate as well as his heartbeats. He wasn't out of the woods yet but he had a fighting chance. The doctors and nurses let out a sigh in unison. One of the doctors patted Raph on the back. 

 

"Your brother is quite the fighter. No one could ever come back after an injury like that."

Raph leaned back in his chair, rubbing his pale face. He had given Leo every drop of blood he could spare. "Let's just hope that he gets better." He didn't mean that just in the physical sense.

 

Raph softly squeezed Leo's hand. The doctors set about cleaning Leo, treating all of his small wound as well as his shell. If they didn't his stab wound could get infected.

 

"You should rest, Raphael" The doctor said. "Your brother is in good hands"

 

"I'll rest right here, thanks." Raph said, rubbing Leo's hand with his thumb. "I'm not leaving his side until he wakes up."

 

The doctor did not insist, instead he placed a thick blanket upon Raph's shoulders and continued with his labour. Raph felt his eye slip closed against his will. Before he knew it, he was asleep.

 

\--

 

Mikey lay shivering on one of the beds. He should be enjoying fresh, clean and new sheets but he couldn't. What Leo said and did before the battle ran through his head.

 

If it wasn't for the Foot Ninja showing up, Leo would have raped him.

 

Mikey slipped off the bed, feeling a level of unsafety that he hadn't felt in a long time. He hid under the bed like a child- curling up and pressing himself into the corner as best he could.

 

Someone as terrible as him didn't deserve to be comfortable.

 

"Mikey? Are you awake?"

 

Don peered inside the room that was given to his baby brother to spend the night. 

 

"Mikey?"

 

Mikey covered his mouth to try and stop the sob the came from him, but he couldn't. It easily gave away his position.

 

"Mikey, what's wrong?" Don came in, turning on the lights. "It's just me"

 

"L-Leave me alone.." Mikey said, curling more, hidden under the bed. "I d-dirty little s-slut like me doesn't d-deserve to see you.."

 

Don approached the bed and crouched to see his brother hiding. "Why would you call yourself like that?"

 

"B-becuse t-thats what I am.." Mikey sniffed. "L-Leo should have j-just raped me and k-killed me.. b-but those ninja appeared.."

 

"You do know Leo would never do such a thing, right?" Don said, trying to mask his shock with a stoic expression.

 

"..." Mikey hid his face, hiding his neck. "H-He.. was.. g-going to.."

 

"How do you know that? How do you know he wasn't just trying to scare you?"

 

"H-he grabbed my t-tail.. w-was s-starting to push his f-finger in me w-when I said.. said s-something and h-he was g-gonna slap me.."

 

"... well... we'll have to ask him what his real intention was when he wakes up" Don said. "Now, please come out. I can't hug you if I can't reach you"

 

Mikey shook his head. "B-but he w-was right. I a-am a l-little slut.. If... If I had let my crush on Raph go.. a-and hadn't tried to separate you two then you would-have-never-had-that-argument-and-Raph-wouldn't-have-been-raped-by-Shredder!" He said, almost too fast for Donnie to catch.

 

Don shook his head and sighed. "Is that what you thought all those years? Mikey, that had nothing to do with you I swear!" He tried to slid beneath the bed. "Yes, I was mad but not at you! Never at you, my love"

 

Mikey shifted, poking his head out from under the bed. "R.. Really..?"

 

Don smiled and nodded. "Really. You need to hear the whole story, all of you. Now come here, I've waited 30 years to hug you."

 

Mikey hugged Donnie tightly, slipping out completely from the bed. He clung to Donnie. "Did.. did you know about.. what Shredder did to Raph?"

 

"Sadly, yes. Bishop informed me once I woke up" Don said, nuzzling Mikey. "He had his men keep track of all of you"

 

"I found out a week ago.. a-and Angel and Leo found the video the day before yesterday.." Mikey said in a small voice. "I k-kinda suspected b-but.. Raph pretty much kept it a secret this whole time.."

 

"It's understandable. No one wants to tell something like that to their loved ones" Don commented. "But let's not talk about that for now. You should be resting, your surgery it's in a few hours"

 

"Sugary? What sugary?" Mikey blinked at him. "Also, you've been around Bishop too long. Ya talk a lot like him."

 

Don chuckled. "I suppose hanging with a guy like him 24/7 for 30 years had to affect some of my personal traits" He sat up and urged Mikey to do the same. "It's your arm. I contacted Mortu and he brought your arm here. It wasn't finished but with the new technology Bishop and I have been working on, we were able to accelerate the process"

 

Mikey held his stump. "It.. it d-doesn't contain any robotics.. d-does it?"

 

"Nope. Biological materials only"

 

Mikey relaxed, then hesitated. "I'm not.. I'm not sure I deserve to have my arm back."

 

"After all the shit you went through? You deserve more than just your arm back" Don replied.

 

"What.. what about Leo's shell. A-and his eyesight..?"

 

"All of that will be taken care of in time. For now we have to stabilize him, rid him of any infection, drug or illness before we start working on his shell. His eyesight will be easier but a bit painful"

 

“Good." Mikey said bluntly. He didn't make it clear which part of that he thought was 'good'. He then sighed. "Donnie.. why have you been with Bishop all this time. D-Did you n-not even try to contact us? I mean-" He covered his eyes. "S-Shadow died trying to f-find you.."

 

This time Don couldn't hide his emotions. "... Shadow... she... Bishop didn't inform me of that..."

 

Mikey was.. almost relieved to see Donnie actually having some emotion. "She.. she went off and never came back. L-Later Raph s-said Casey told him t-that she was with him now." Mikey sighed. "Raph tried to drink himself to death s-so many times.. h-he told me he'd see Casey.."

 

"Yeah... I was told of his drinking problem but... Shadow..." Don threw his head back to rest on the bed.

 

Mikey lay with him. "R-Raph could be wrong.." He then frowned. "How.. how did you know about Raph's drinking problem? How did Bishop know all this stuff?"

 

"Like I said, he made his men keep track of you for when I woke up" Don repeated. "You still don't pay attention to a word I say, that's both nice and annoying" He chuckled.

 

Mikey suddenly growl and stood up. "No! YOU'RE not listening to what I'm saying! HOW did he know?! Did we have a spy? Did he hack us?! This isnt- this isn't f-fair-" His voice cracked. "A-all this time you got to hear about us- when we heard nothing about you! We didn't even know  if you were alive or not! I lost my arm- Casey died! Leo lost his shell and eyesight. Raph lost his eyes and was fucking raped b-because we thought Shredder had you! All that because Bishop and you didn't thinkin to drop us an 'I'm okay' message! FUCK YOU!"

 

"Mikey, did you even pay attention to what I said? I wasn't here, I was dead!" Don blurted out, also standing up. 

 

"W-what..?" Mikey said, looking at him. "What do you mean dead!? All you said is you 'woke up'.!"

 

"... I wish I could've had you all here when I told you what happened but I guess that won't be possible" Don said sitting on the bed.

 

"It all started right after my fight with Raph..."

 

"G-go on.." Mikey said, hugging himself with his one arm.

 

Don took a deep breath before continuing. "He... he wasn't willing to share what we had with you and Leo. When I told him I wasn't against it, he lost it and we broke up"

 

"I needed some air and advice so I went to April's but I got sidetracked on the way"

 

"H-he s-said that because he was angry at me.." Mikey mumbled,

 

"Anyway, I heard Chaplin talking to Bishop; his boss wanted to make a deal with him: if he handed over the information about the Utroms and all the alien technology he'd acquired during his years of studies, Shredder would allow him to join his inner circle and spare his life and, of course, Bishop wasn't having any of that"

 

"Without us knowing, Shredder had been working on an full scale invasion plan and all he needed was Bishop's expertise" Don continued. "What Shredder didn't know is that Bishop's obsession with aliens wasn't going to let him part from his precious toys"

 

"The negotiation went wrong, strong words and death threats were exchanged and me? Well, I should've left when I had the chance... I'd heard too much..."

 

"You.. got caught in some sort of cross fire?" Mikey asked in a small voice.

 

"Sort of. Bishop didn't stand a chance in that worn out body of his; he was breaking down during the fight and for some reason I felt like I had to help him"

 

"I had to convince Stockman to take us to Bishop's base so we could do the whole 'new body' process but right after he dialed the coordinates, Hun took him and we left without him."

 

"Yeah, both of them are dead now. Shredder squished them." Mikey said.

 

"So I heard" Don said. "I called April and told her I'd be staying with LH for a few days. Knowing he was in Florida that time of the year, Raphael wouldn't be looking for me in his lair which gave me enough time to make another clone body for Bishop. However I didn't think it would take me that long and before I knew it, Shredder was already destroying New York"

 

"I know what you're going to say, why didn't I leave Bishop and went back to you? Well, he was the only one with enough knowledge of Utrom and alien technology overall to stop Shredder. I figured if I saved him, he would help us fight back- have a temporary truce. To my surprise not only he agreed to help, he also revealed to me a life changing experience that changed his way of looking at alien life forms"

 

"What.. what did he do..?" Mikey took a step away from Donnie and closer to the door.

 

"He was saved by one of his prisoners"

 

Mikey blinked. He rubbed his head. "Seriously?"

 

"Yes. As unbelievable as it sounds, Bishop does have a conscience after all" Don offered his brother a small smile.

 

Mikey didn't return it. "So, what happened next?"

 

"During the test process, Bishop's base was attacked by Karai-bots. Stockman had given away our location and sent his ninja to destroy the lab and Bishop. That's when I got all of these" Don said showing his scars.

 

"Y-yeah.. Karai-bots took my arm.." Mikey said.

 

“We barely made it out alive but when we thought we were out of danger, the Elite ninja came after us. The body I designed for Bishop was ten times more resistant than any of the ones Stockman did for him. Mine wasn't as lucky"

 

Don closed his eyes remembering that moment as if it was yesterday. He could still feel the sword going through his chest, barely missing his heart.

 

Mikey took a step closer to the door, not liking where this was going. "W-what happened?"

 

"I died. Or was dying. I do remember Bishop calling me but other than that, only darkness" Don answered calmly. "When I woke up, 30 years had passed"

 

"Bishop informed me he'd done the same cloning process using my notes only this wasn't cloning. It's... hard to explain but the mutagen and his techonology kept my body alive until he could bring my conscience back"

 

"You're not.. you're not a roboti-android-cyborg thing.. a-are you?"

 

Don looked at him before searching in one of the drawers; he pulled a small knife and put his hand on top of the wooden surface. The fear that Donnie was about to show Mikey some sort of robotics underneath his skin got to him before he could stay to see the answer. He bailed from the room, running down the hallway as fast as he could. Irrasional fear and blind panic overtaking him.

  
  


Back in the room, Don cursed lowly. Maybe a simple 'no' would've worked out nicely. 

 

"I do act like Bishop, don't I?" Don asked to himself.

 

"Yeah, you do." Came Raph's voice. He stepped into the room, smoking. "Sorry, overheard ya little backstory."

 

"That's ok, saved me the trouble of telling it again" Don said putting the knife down. "You shouldn't smoke, you know?"

 

Raph was already lighting up the next one as Donnie said that. Before he said anything, they saw Mikey being pulled past on the stretcher, having been sedated.

 

"So, asleep for 30 years eh?" Raph grunted.

 

"In a way, yes"

 

"I was just starting to move on." Raph said. He took another drag of his cigarette. "Juuuust starting to get over you."

 

"... you still can if that's what you wish" Don replied. "Personally, I never wanted this to end but I can't force you to do something that clashes with your new lifestyle"

 

"Donnie." Raph said, lighting yet another one. "I love you, you know that." He played with the cap of his lighter. "I wish I could hate you. But now I j-just can't, knowing what really happened." He pocketed his lighter.

 

"That's not what you said that night" Don said, crossing his arms. "And you still hate me, all of you do. No matter what I do, no matter if I'm alive or dead, my stupid decisions caused this. It doesn't bother me if you hate me or love me or if you even want me back. I'm just glad you guys are alive and I can be of service to you. Once you're healed, believe me, I'll be more than glad to step out of your lives"

 

"If you even try it do that I'll hunt you down for the rest of our lives." Raph said. "I let you walk away once. I'm never letting you do it again." He took the cig out of his mouth. "And besides, you did what you thought was right and what you thought would be the best for everyone. In a weird way, it probably was. I know Splinter would have been proud of ya."

 

"Yeah sure. 'Leave your team, Donatello. Make the world fall into chaos' Oh I'm so happy I stuck around to learn that lesson. Yes Raphael, he is so proud~"

 

"I'm trying to make ya feel better. No need to be a dick about it." Raph grunted, smirking a little. He found the smirk faded. "I'm angry Donnie, and there's no one to be angry at. You definitely don't deserve it. Shredder does. But he's dead now."

 

"Well, one thing is for sure: Leo will hate my guts and Mikey is terrified of me for some reason." Don sighed. "I guess what you wanted came true... it's just you and me in the end. And you know what? It kinda sucks"

 

"Mikey's terrorfied of robots. Especially people looking robots." Raph said. "Once he knows you're not one, he'll calm down. As for Leo.. Leo hates everyone. Only person he doesn't hate is Angel." Raph took a step closer. "You really think it being just me and you would suck? And you said that you don't care if I hate or love you. Is that really true?"

 

"I stopped caring ever since your pigheaded brain couldn't accept the fact that I wanted to share, I wanted all of us to be closer! But noooo, no you couldn't- UGH! We've been over this 30 years ago!" Don growled, pushing past him and heading to the door.

 

Raph grabbed Donnie's hand. "Yeah, that was 30 years ago. And despite what Bishop can tell you, what he can't tell you is whats going on in my head." He pulled Donnie closer to him. "And I've realised you were right." He let go.

 

"It's too late for that, for me at least" Don replied.

 

The genius paced around the room. "My niece is dead, my friends are dead, my FATHER is dead! How do you want THIS to work?! We're not a team anymore. We're broken, our family is broken and not even 30 more years will fix that."

 

Donnie saw in Raph's eye that tiny, hopeful spark was suddenly crushed. He had it growing ever since Shredder had died and it had taken a beating- but in less than a few minutes, Donnie had stamped it out.

 

Don sighed heavily. "Look... what happened that night it's in the past. I can help you guys heal and fix whatever happened between you three but count me out of further activities"

 

"I guess if you're not even willing to try.." Raph put his hand into his jacket and pulled out the purple bandanna Mikey had given to him a few weeks ago. "Then there's no reason to try at all." He placed in to Donnie hand.

 

Don stared at the purple fabric, so different from the one he currently wore. It was old, it had lost some of its color but it felt like the real Donatello. It felt like home.

 

Raph kiss his temple. He slipped the small knife from the dresser into his pocket without Donnie noticing and headed to the door. "Up until now, the one thing that kept me going was the hope that I would be able to love you and for you to love me back like we did once. Now I realise how stupid I was." He then began to walk down the corridor.

 

Something was telling him to drop the act and run to Raphael; he had to forget and forgive if he ever wanted to have some of his old life back, his real life not this premade hellish reality he'd woken up to. One thing was certain, in all those years he never stopped loving Raph or any of his brothers. 

 

And there he was, turning their brothers' lives upside down once again.Why couldn't he just bring back his old self? The one that believe that everything had a solution? 

 

"Raph...?" He called to his former lover.

 

"See ya around Donnie." Raph gave a small wave. "If you need me, I'll be on the roof.." He fingered the small knife in his other pocket.

 

"... what if it doesn't work?" Don asked, almost yelling. "What if... what if we can't make it work again? I would... I won't live well with myself if we fail again!"

 

That made Raph stop. "How will you know if you don't even try?"

 

"I... I'm..." Don found it hard to put words togethers but it had to be done. To hell with composure and dignity. "... I don't want to lose you again. I'm scared of screwing everything up"

 

Raph turned around. "You know I'd forgive you as long as you tried." Raph felt oddly calm, trying not to become hopeful again. "It hurts me more than you wanna leave us. That we.. I.. waited all this time to see you again as you just wanna leave us the moment we're physical okay." Raph took a deep breath. "It hurts me more than anything that's ever happened to me."

 

Don approached Raph, old mask in hand. "... will you be willing to... to try? And... and help me fix things, rebuild or family?"

 

Raph pressed his mouth into a thin line for a moment, tears streaming down one side of his face, bloody tears on the other. He smiled though. "Yes. A thousand times yes."

 

Don used his old mask to clean Raph's face. "We need to fix this eye of yours first" He said, his voice cracking a little.

 

"D-does it really look that bad?" Raph tried to joke. He found though that now his tears were flowing, they couldn't stop. His mouth twitched as a rollercoaster of emotions went through him. He hugged Donnie close and tight. "I.. I w-was just..." He pressed the small knife into Donnie's hand. "-on the r-roof.. c-cause I can't.. I'd rather die than b-be without you."

 

Now it was Don's turn to cry. Just imagining what he was about to cause, more pain. More suffering for his loved ones.  "If you ever think of that again, I'll fucking kill you myself" Don sobbed. "You stupid asshole... I fucking love you!"

 

Raph half chuckled, half sobbed. "I f-fucking love you too Donnie. W-with all my heart and soul. I've b-been so broken without you." He held Donnie close, guiding him and himself into the room rather than them both sobbing in the corridor.

 

"I'm so sorry... I should've never left. I should've stayed home with you and the others!"

 

Raph shut the door and wiped Donnie's tears away. "I t-think if we're all to move on we have to p-put the past behind us.. but.." He stroke Donnie's neck. "R-reason why I got so angry was because I loved you so much. I didn't wanna s-share you b-because I was afraid you'd fall for Leo or Mikey m-more than me and I'd lose you.." He nuzzled Donnie's cheek. "I know now I'd rather share you than lose you completely."

 

"How could you dare doubt my feelings for you? You really are stupid!" Don hid his face on Raph's chest. "... don't ever change"

 

Raph smiled, holding Donnie close. "Even though I'm this stupid?"

 

Don chuckled. "Hell, yeah. You think I fell for your good looks?"

 

"Good, because I've got even less of those now." Raph said, carefully touching his socket.

 

"I don't know, you still look  pretty good to me"

 

Raph smiled. He couldn't take it any more. He leaned over and kissed his lost lover deeply. Don returned Raph' gesture, cupping his cheeks and tenderly rubbing small circles on his face. He smiled when he felt small shivers and a shy churr coming from his beloved. After all that time and it still felt like the first kiss.

 

Raph smiled softly. "I love you so much." He stroked Donnie's cheek and churred. "And I will never let you go, ever again."

 

Don leaned into Raph's hands, nuzzling it in appreciation. It felt rougher than before but he was no teen anymore, yet still it was the most comfortable sensation in the world. 

 

"Did you get to see Leo?"

 

"I just stepped out from his room for a smoke when I heard you. I wanna be there when he wakes up." Raph said. "I've got a lot to make up for. I abandoned him that day..."

 

"From what I've heard, you didn't have much of a choice in the subject"

 

Raph pulled his hands back. "W... you... let me guess.. Bishop?"

 

Don nodded. "Don't feel bad about that, it wasn't your fault. Everyone in your position would've done the same."

 

Raph shook his head. "So many people seem to know without me telling them..”

 

"I don't think you'd like to go over that again, even as a memory." Don said. A knock on the door had them separating from each other. "Who is it?" Don asked. 

 

"Mr. Hamato, Bishop requests your presence in his office immediately" 

 

"I'll be there soon"

 

Raph leaned over and kissed Donnie's temple. "I'll be with Leo." He smiled softly.

 

"Before I forget, Mortu wants to talk to you about your eye. You should at least listen to him" Don said before walking towards the door.  "Personally, I love you with or without it." He added and closed the door softly on his way out.

 

Raph smiled, whispering to himself. "I'll do it, for you."


	15. Chapter 15

The sound of beeping woke Mikey up. He looked around, unsure of what happened. One moment he was running away from possible robo-Don, and now he was here in a bed.

He retched up and scratched his face.

With his 'missing' arm.

Mikey's eyes widened as he looked down at his arm. He wasn't prepared to see his arm there. He had spent more time without it than with it. He began to panic, the idea of robotics still in his head.

"Get it off! GET IT OFF!" He clawed at his new arm, panicking.

Nurses and doctors rushed inside the room, trying to restrain Mikey.

"Get off!" Mikey struggled for a while.

"Nurse, I think we might have to sedate him again." Doctor said. "We'll have to contact Mr Hamato to get permission."

"He's with Agent Bishop at the moment." The nurse said, holding Mikey's legs still. "He'll rip off his new arm by the time we contact him!"

"Mikey." Mikey heard a growl. Raph stepped out. "Calm down, You'll wake up Leo."

"Raph! Raph, get them off me!" Mikey called to him desperately. "Get them off me! I won't be one of their experiments!"

Raph walked over, leaned over him and kissed him softly. He pulled back and stroked his cheek. "Calm down, everything's okay. They just attached your arm that Mortu made. It's all biological. I promise you."

"W...what?"

"Mr. Mortu and Agent Bishop accelerated the reconstruction process." The doctor said. "Your arm is 100% made out of your own flesh and DNA"

The doctor then signaled the nurse to leave Mikey's legs, then she went to retrieve something from the doctor's desk.

"Mikey, Donnie helped give you a new arm. And no, he's not a robot. He's just even more socially awkward then he was before." Raph smiled a little, stroking Mikey's new arm

Mikey saw the nurse return with what it appeared to be X-ray sheets. 

"Take a look. It's all organic bone" The doctor said, showing Mikey the images.

Mikey, now calmer, raised his "new" arm and compared it to the X-ray. "... my... my arm..."

Raph smiled and kissed Mikey's temple. "It's amazing Mikey"

"It'll take a little while to get used to it again." The doctor said

"Can... can I see Don?" Mikey asked.

"The moment he's free I'll make sure he comes over." Raph said. "But right now he's in some sort of meeting."

Mikey tried to sit up helping himself with both his arms. He winced and cursed loudly when his new arm gave up, unable to resist his weight yet.

"Easy there Mikey." Raph said, giving him a nuzzle. He took Mikey's need hand in his, rubbing it with his thumb.

Mikey shivered, the gentle caress feeling so new to him. "... I can feel it..."

Raph smiled. "Yeah? Does it feel good? I doesn't hurt, does it?"

"No... not at all" Mikey smiled. "It's weird but good..."

Raph grinned. "Good." He pulled back. "I don't think Leo's gonna wake up any time soon. Want me to stay with you?"

Hearing his older brother's name still made him uneasy. No matter what Don said, Leo was dangerous and he didn't want him around.

"Yeah, yeah please"

"Okay." Raph leaned over and kissed Mikey's forehead.

\--

Don knocked on the door before entering. "Your soldier said you wanted to see me"

"Yes." Bishop said, looking up. "Please take a seat."

The genius turtle did so. He accepted the cup with steaming coffee that was offered to him. "So, what is it?"

"I have sent a message to April and the rebels." Bishop said. "They know about us and that we have the turtles safe. However, I have yet to mention you."

"Hmm... that's good, I guess. I take it you didn't come up with the creepy scientist approach this time?"

Bishops chuckles a little. "And what of you? What did you tell your brothers?"

"The truth" Don said after taking a sip of coffee. "They deserved to know"

"All the truth?" Bishop asked.

"Most of it. You can now prepare yourself to be added in Mikey's Xmas cards"

Bishop smiled. "Well, it's about time. I have come to an agreement with the Utrom High Council. I shall be in charge of earth until it is restored enough to be able to hold elections."

Don was a little surprised by the news. "That's a big responsibility"

"Yes it is. And I was hoping that you would be my secound in command. With your brothers to help of course."

"Tempting... I wonder if humanity is ready for a cloned president and a mutant vice president" Don said putting his coffee down.

"I think it will take anything as long as it's good. Humanity is definitely ready for alien interaction though. Infact, it needs to because we need the Utroms." Bishop said

"Speaking of that, how's the negotiation with the Triceratons doing?"

"Very well. It helps that your friend, Traximus, is the Prime Leader still." Bishop said.

Don smiled. "Then I think it's time to bring them here. There's enough nitrogen and sulphur tanks for the rescue units that we'll request."

"Yes, and we shall talk to the Utroms to find a way to allow different species to breath on earth."

The monitors behind Bishop showed him his brothers, two awake and very much alive and one still sleeping-fighting for his life. 

"I just hope my brothers are ready to accept these changes"

"Give them time and your support and I'm sure they will." Bishop said. "And I'll be giving you time to."

"Thank you. You should call Traximus as soon as possible"

"I shall. You are dismissed Donatello." Bishop said, returning to his paperwork.

"Whoa, for a moment there I felt like one of your soldiers" Don chuckled.

Bishop smirked, waving Donnie off as he left.


	16. Chapter 16

"This is ridiculous. Two days, two damn days!" 

April paced in her office like a caged lion. There were no more news from the Hamato family ever since Bishop's message and she was starting to think the worst.

"April.. I'm s-sure they're alright. Mortu said they've been talking with Bishop and he's all for helping. It wouldn't be in his interest to hurt them." Angel reasoned, but she was having massive doubts herself.

"Well, he hasn't given me any reasons to trust in him." April replied, pouring herself some vodka.

"Yeah, I agree with that." Angel said, taking the vodka and drinking it.

"Didn't the doctor say you couldn't drink yet?"

"Eh. It's just a bit of vodka." Angel said. "I won't have any more."

April shrugged. "Suit yourself"

Suddenly, the phone rang. The rebel leader hurried to answer. "Yes?"

"Ms O'Neil?" Came Bishop's voice.

April frowned. "It's Jones. What do you want, Bishop?"

"I have been requested to inform you of what is going on in more detail. My... secound in command suggests it." Bishop said.

"I'm listening"

"First of all, Donatello is alive. He was in a coma for the last 30 years and I have been looking after after him." Bishop said. "He is my secound in command now."

"... I'm sorry but I think we're too old to be making prank calls, don't you think?"

“Believe me or not, it is the truth." Bishop said. "The turtles are healing and spending time with him."

April's grip on the phone tightened. "That's enough bullshit for one day! I knew you were up to something, Bishop, but you're gonna fucking get it!" 

She hung up and kicked the phone off the table.

Angel sighed and handed April and vodka. April drank the whole liquid in one swig, grimacing at the taste. "Tell the guys downstairs to give me the location where the call came from. We're going hunting tonight"

\---

"Oh, Donnie-" Raph said. "Mikey's awake. He wants to talk to you."

Don handed his assistant a folder before following Raph to the infirmary.

"Donnie!" Mikey held up both of his arms for a hug. "I'm... I'm sorry.. I d-didn't mean to freak out earlier.."

"You mean two days ago" Don smiled, approaching the bed to hug his brother back. "I see you got your new arm"

Mikey nuzzled him. "Thanks Donnie.."

"No need to thank me. This is the least I could do"

"I love you Donnie. I'm s-so glad you're alive.."

"Same goes for you three." Don replied, pulling away. "When Bishop lost all contact with you I thought you were dead"

"Takes a lot to kills us." Raph said.

"Although we would have never lived unless it was for that other Donnie. The one that killed Shredder." Mikey said,

"There was another me?"

"You mean Bishop didn't tell ya that?" Raph said. "This Donnie from another time, or dimension, or whatever appeared. He killed Shredder and then vanished back to his time/place."

"I guess that was the day the security systems went crazy. He did inform me of a disturbance" Don said. "After that, the cameras went back on and he saw you three bleeding"

Raph rubbed his chest. "No idea how we survived that one.."

"Best not think of that for now. Have you talked to Mortu about your eye, Raph?"

"No, I've been keeping Mikey and Leo company." Raph said.

"He's being stubborn. Wants to know we're okay first." Mikey said.

"Well, Mortu and Zilx were thinking it'd be better to work on Leo's eyes now he's unconscious to spare him from some of the pain."

Mikey and Raph exchanged a look, then nodded eagerly. "I think it would be better to do it now." Raph said. "Gives him a chance to heal."

"I'll send them the message" Don said. "In the meantime, I wanna know what you've been up to before I found you"

"Mostly just trying to keep people safe." Raph said. "And not getting on with each other."

"Leo and Raph's relationship got.. m-much worse.." Mikey said. "A-and I thought the only way they'd love me i-is if I l-let them use me.."

"Mikey.." Raph held his new hand.

"I was informed of your nightly activities but I didn't think something like that would ever happen."

"I've promised myself I'd make it up to Mikey." Raph said. "So.. I know we'll be sharing each other."

"R-Really?" Mikey looked hopeful.

"He has to, otherwise he won't have neither of us" Don joked.

Mikey looked between them. Raph was grinning. Mikey grinned back. "Yes! I d-don’t have to be left behind!"

"Who could ever say such a horrible thing~?" Don nuzzled his little brother. "No sir, no brother of mine will be left behind"

Mikey churred, hugging Donnie with both arms. Loving the fact he could hug him with both arms.

"Have you eaten? We have the best Utrom chef; Mikey I think you'll love the new recipes he comes up with"

"I haven't eaten, nor has Raph!" Mikey said. "C-can.. can he make like... s-stew? I would love some real meat."

Don pulled away looking at them as if they'd grown a second head. "YOU HAVEN'T EATEN?!" He stalked out of the room in a matter of seconds, leaving Raph and Mikey looking at each other and shrugging.

"When did we last eat? Like, last week?" Mikey asked.

"Something like that. We went back onto rations." Raph said

"Sorry about that" Don came back, panting. "I can't believe you guys haven't eaten! I gave clear instructions to the staff!"

"Man! I can't wait to eat." Mikey said happily. "A week is way too long to wait for a meal." Mikey chuckled, not realising how bad it sounded.

Don blinked and rushed out of the room again. He was really pissed off.

"I SWEAR HEADS WILL ROLL!" Was all Raph and Mikey could hear him say as he walked away.

Raph rubbed his head. He stood up. "Donnie, come back. It's okay."

"Just let him be" A young maid said entering with drinks for the brothers. "You do NOT want to be near him when he's mad"

Raph chuckled, looking at the maid. "You know, growing up everyone said I was the angry one. But Donnie was the scariest when angry."

The young woman chuckled. "I could tell you stories but during my break time. I don't want him yelling at me"

Raph accepted the glass of fresh, clean water. He drank greedily. Secound later the glass was empty. "May I please have more?"

"Sure thing" The maid poured some more water for both turtles. "There's some soda and juice if you want some"

"Yes!" Mikey said happily. But he downed a couple of glasses of water first.

"Wow.. I haven't had clean water for a while." Raph said. He had a habit of giving anything good he had to the children.

"I can't imagine what you've been through. Me and my sister were born here, in the bunkers underground- oh crap, he's coming!"

"It's okay, calm down." Raph flashed her a sexy smile. "I can handle him." He waited till Donnie was about to step inside before getting her to pour him a glass of water. So there was no doubt the maid was doing her job.

"Good, at least SOMEONE here actually listens to me" Don said, turning to reprimand the others. "Well? What are you waiting for?! Get that food in there!"

Raph walked over to Donnie. He rested his hand on Donnie's shoulder. "It's okay. We'll be okay if food is a minute later."

Mikey giggled. "Seriously Donnie, calm down. These guys looked terrified."

"They had it coming." Don glared at them as they nervously rushed with the trays. Another group brought a table and chairs.

Raph sat at one of the chairs. Mikey had a tray placed on his lap as he wasn't allowed to leave the bed just yet.

The staff members left as well as the young maid so the family could dine in peace.

"So, Donnie, sounds like you're a little tyrant." Raph teased him. He noticed all the food. "Whoa... s-so much food.." He began to eat greedily.

"Yeah well this 'tyrant' is going to feed you till you don't fit inside your shell"

"YAY!" Mikey said, eating quickly and happily.

Raph chuckled. He ate slower, noticing how Donnie kept piling food on his plate.

"You have to try the duck, it's the best and my personal favorite." Don said happily.

A soldier came rushing inside the room. "Mr. Donatello, you are needed on intensive care! It's an emergency!"

"What is it?" Raph said, looking up. "Is it Leo?!"

"Yes. He woke up and started attacking everyone!"

Raph forced himself. "NO! NO! I w-was gonna be there for him!" Raph rushed to Leo's room. He could see Leo holding the IV drip, trying to keep the doctors back.

"LEO! RELAXE!" Raph said, coming in. "Everything okay! Calm down!"

The blind warrior couldn't focus on his brother's voice; everything was so dark and there were so many voices. The smells, the sounds... he was in some kind of hospital. But how could that be? There were no hospitals left!

"STAY BACK!" He yelled.

Raph turned to the doctors. "Everyone leave. I'll deal with him." Raph waited till the room was empty. "Leo, Leo it me. Raph. Everything's okay. Just calm down.."

Leo shook his head, still trying to orientate himself. "No... no, you can't fool me. Where are my brothers?!"

"It is me." He suddenly grabbed Leo's hand, and Leo could feel Raph's fingers. "You are in one of Bishop's bases. He rescued us. I know that doesn't sound right now it's true."

"Bishop...?" That only seemed to make things worse. Leo used the IV drip to attack Raph.

Raph defended himself as best he could, but he didn't want Leo to get hurt. "LEO! Calm down! We're with Bishop b-because he's been looking after Donnie, who was in a coma for 30 years!" He tried to explain.

"SHUT UP! SHUT. UP!!!"

Leo's attacks were sloppy and random, not really aimed at Raph anymore.

Raph grabbed the end of the IV stand and held it fast. "Leo, calm down. Please j-just calm down!"

"You want to kill me, don't you? THEN DO IT! JUST FUCKING DO IT!" Leo screamed. "I'm fucking blind and hurt, GO AHEAD! KILL ME!"

For a moment there, Raph thought his brother was hallucinating. He didn't even know what Leo was talking about anymore.

Raph retched forwards and placed his hand either side of Leo's head. "No. I will not abandon you this time. Whatever's happen to you right now, I will help you through it."

Leo struggled but he was getting weaker and tired. The pain from his surgery was draining him; he let himself slid down until he sat on the cold floor. 

"... you're here for me... just take me, please... I want to be with my father..." Leo sobbed.

Raph knelt beside him. "Leo, I know what it's like to want to die. Believe me. But it's not worth it. We'll see them later... for now we have to try and make our lives better, for ourselves and each other."

Leo started to laugh. "Funny... I didn't know The Reaper had Raph's voice... it's a good way to leave though"

Now it all made sense, Leo was indeed hallucinating. Raph pulled Leo close to him and stroked his head softly, humming an old lullaby. "Just go to sleep Leo.."

Leo couldn't fight back anymore and let whoever was with him lull him to sleep.

"You can come in now." Raph said, knowing Donnie waited.

When the genius came in, everything was a mess. "What in the world-"

"He was hallucinating. He had one terrible fever." Raph said, lifting Leo into the bed.

"That shouldn't be. The sedatives..." Don stopped himself. "... the sedatives" He repeated. He looked for Leo's medical chart to see what medicine had been given to him.

Raph sat on the chair next to Leo, still stroking Leo's head. "What is it?"

"Those assholes... I CLEARLY SAID ENOUGH WITH THE DOUBLE DOSE!"

"They overdosed him?" Raph asked.

"Apparently. They must've thought his body would resist." Don said, quickling scribbling some notes down for the doctor to read.

Raph nuzzled Leo softly, for the first time in a long time. "Will he be okay?"

"He should once the meds start to wear off." Don said, walking towards the bed. "But this means we can't work on his eyesight yet."

Raph sighed. "I'm not so hungry anymore.."

"That's alright. There will be still food left if you change your mind. Now, I have to see Bishop; there's been enough mistakes for one day"

Raph got up and walked over to Donnie. He cupped his cheek and kissed him softly. Reluctantly, Don broke the kiss almost immediately. "I'm sorry, Raphie. I promise I'll make it up to you tonight"

“You better." Raph smiled. "I just wanted to taste you before running off." He settled back down, looking after Leo.

"You tease." Don chuckled and left his brothers alone.


	17. Chapter 17

Raph was sitting in a chair, gripping onto the armrests tight as his socket was being examined. He hated people seeing it, and right now both Donnie, Zilx and other doctors were all taking turns to examine it. One of the things he hated was, with the torch they could see into his skull.

"What do you think?" Don asked out loud. 

"It won't be hard to replace it although there's a chance he might not see well with the new eye" Zilx said.

Raph couldn't take it anymore. He covered his socket up with his hand and moved his head. "H-how.. how badly would it be?"

"Bad enough to wear glasses for a lifetime" Zilx chuckled. 

Raph screwed up hid snout in dislike. "Glasses? Really?"

"Is there a way we can avoid that?" Don asked. "I think my brother would like to be able to fight without having to worry about losing his glasses"

"How about a permanent contact lense?" One of the other doctors suggested.

"That could work" Zilx nodded approvingly. "You ok with that, boy?"

Raph sneered a little at being called 'boy'. "Dunno, I'd have to think about it I guess. How long would it take to make the eye?"

"Couple of days" Don said, reading the schematics again. "You won't be seeing with it right away for two hours though"

"A-and if it doesn't work could you just remove it?" Raph asked.

"Why would we ever do that?" Zilx exclaimed feeling a bit offended. "And what do you mean it won't work, of course it will!"

Raph went quiet at that. He said nothing for a moment then spoke. "Fine, let’s do it."

"Excellent. I just take a sample and-"

The alarms went off startling everyone.

Don groaned. "Now what!"

"Attention Everyone." Bishop's voice came. "It seems the compound is being attacked by the rebels. Due to the current situation possibly being caused by confusion, only subdue them. Do not kill anyone."

"That must be April." Don realized. "Raph, you stay here. I'll see if I can reason with her"

"Like shell I'm staying here. I'm not leaving your side." Raph said, following Donnie.

"Fine but I'm not kissing your booboos if you get hurt"

Raph chuckled, "You know you'd want to."

Outside, the rebels had the place surrounded. There were more in numbers now the slaves had been freed from the labour camps. Raph and Donnie made their way through the soilders. "We have to find April..."

Raph spotted her first and went running over. "April! APRIL STOP! IT’S OKAY!"

But before April could say anything, one of the rebels accidently fired their gun. Raph knew in that instant that if it hit one of the soldiers, all hell would break loose. The peace they were trying to achieve would break.

It felt like slow motion as Raph took the bullet.

April dropped her gun and ran to him. "RAPH!" She looked back at her rebels. "HOLD YOUR FIRE! I SAID HOLD YOUR FIRE!"

She failed to notice someone was already by Raph's side. 

"It's ok, it's just your arm"

"HEY! GET AWAY FROM HIM, YOU-" April froze the moment she saw who was that tending to Raphael's wound.

Raph chuckled at little, seeing April's face. "T-told you Donnie w-was still alive."

April wasn't really an easy to impress woman, not after 30 years of seeing all kinds of horrors and miracles but this, this was too much.

She fainted.

"... I think that went well"

"Glad I w-wasn't the only one who fainted upon see ya." Raph chuckled.

"Hey, everyone!" Mikey said, coming out. "Everyone stand down! Everything's fine!" He began to calm down the rebels, explaining everything that was going on.

"You heard the turtle! Put your guns down!" Ted ordered.

Mikey went over to Ted. "Hey, Ted, look!" He showed him the new arm.

"Well, holy shit on a stick!" Ted smiled. "You actually got your arm back!"

"Yeah! Donnie, Bishop and Zilx did it!" Mikey said happily. "I know its weird, but Bishop's really helping."

"Donnie? Your lost brother?"

"Yeah! He's been in a coma this whole time." Mikey said. One of the soldiers announced that if the rebels followed them, they'd get medical care and food.

Ted frowned. "Are you for real? That sounds like straight from a badly written fiction book"

"It certainly sounds like that, doesn't it?" Don said helping Raph to stand.

"But there he is." Mikey smiled.

Raph grinned at Ted, even though his arm was hurting badly. "I got my brother back, Ted. C'mon, let's get some food too."

\----

Ted whistled. "Wow, this sure is a nice base"

"Is, isn't it!" Mikey said happily, "And Bishop and Murto are like, gonna make the rest of the world look this nice."

"T-thats the plan anyway." Raph said. It was a few hours later and his arm was bandaged

"I still don't get this whole hibernation story of yours though" Ted said, looking at Don.

"I can't believe it myself" He replied. "One minute I was bleeding out, the next I'm waking up in a bunker"

Raph looked at his hands. He seriously hoped it was a truth. He smiled though. "I'm just glad I have you back.

"Just wait till Angel knows about this." Ted slapped Don's shell amicably. "She won't leave your side. Ever!"

Don smiled. "I hope that doesn't become a problem for you two. I heard you're getting married"

"Oh yeah, speaking of that... where's Leo? Angel will kill me if I don't bring him back"

"Leo's recovering from nearly being stabbed together." Mikey said bluntly. Almost emotionless.

"He would be awake by now if those amateurs from the medical staff had listened to me" Don said. "Remind me to fill a report on that."

Ted elbowed Raph. "Is it me or does Mikey seem a little detached about your bro's situation?"

"Yeah, I don't know why." Raph whispered. "But they were together alone just before I came to help them."

Don stopped by a door and dialed a code. "Alright so now should be a good time to check up on April"

"Better let me get in first, who knows if she'll faint again." Ted said, stepping in front of Don.

"That won't be necessary. I'm sure once she sees me and I explain to her what's going on, everything will be fine"

Mikey shook his head. "Just be careful she doesn't attack you. We'll all grumpy when we wake up."

The door opened slowly. "April? Are you awake?"

"Hey chief, got any grenades for us? If you do, keep 'em. My fiancee would like me back alive, please" Ted said.

"Yeah, yeah. Come in" April grunted.

Don entered the room despite Ted's warnings, carefully and without sudden movements. 

"Hi April. How do you feel?"

April shrugged. "I guess I'm ok"

Mikey followed in behind them. "Don't worry, Raph fainted too when he saw Donnie."

The rebel leader snorted humorlessly. "So you two buy this shit too, huh?"

"April, I know it's hard to believe but... he really is Donnie. He's not a robot and he know things only Donnie would know." Mikey said.

"Oh I doubt he's a robot" April stood up in one swift move. "But this cannot be the real Donatello"

"April, ask me whatever you want and I'll answer it" Don said.

"Who says you don't have his memories? Just ask Bishop! He's been doing the same with his own body, why should it be different with you too?!"

"DOES IT EVEN MATTER?!" Mikey suddenly snapped. "W-we have our Donnie, in memories and body! I dont care if he wasn't the 'original' or whatever bullshit you're thinking might be." Mikey shook. "Please... p-please don't ruin this.."

"Ok, everybody calm down" Don stood between them. "Raph, please take Mikey to his room. I need a minute with her"

"Sure." Raph said, taking Mikey and Ted away.

"So, you just woke up after 30 years, huh?" April said.

"Yes, as unbelievable as it sounds, it's exactly what happened."

"I don't think you're Donnie." April said. "There's no way you can be."

"What can I do to prove you I am Donatello? Say it and I'll do it"

"I don't know." April said, trying to contain her emotions. "I can't think of a question that Bishop wouldn't be able to fake a memory too..

Don took her hands in his. "... the night I told you about my feelings for Raph, do you recall it?"

"Of course.." April said

"Then you do remember exactly what happened next." Don continued. "Shadow came in, she was crying because a spider got in her bedroom, on top of her favorite teddy bear, the pink one with the yellow bow and the slightly longer arm because Leo accidentally stabbed it and Raph made a quick repair job. You remember that?"

April nodded, tears running down her face. She covered her mouth, trying to keep everything in

"And then it was a whole nightmare trying to get the little thing out because it kept jumping and Shadow was laughing after all her wigs fell on me and I ended up with a purple one" Don chuckled at the memory.

"D-Donnie.." April said. "I w-want you to be really b-but I c-can’t take the disappointment of you not being.. I j-just.."

"I am real, April. All you see here is real" Don said, wiping her tears gently. "I know it's hard but you have to believe. Believe in me, April. Please"

April hugged him tightly. "I-if you're lying I'll... I'll beat you with your own leg."

Don chuckled. "I wouldn't have it any other way"

April sniffled. "I d-don’t blame Mikey getting upset. If... if Casey or Angel turned up.. I'd.. I'd accept them even they were robot doubles. I missed them s-so much.."

"I wish I could've done something for Casey and Shadow but Bishop never found their bodies" Don sighed. "Shredder or whoever found them must've burned them or something"

April couldn't help but sob hearing that.

"Oh crap, April I'm so sorry! I-I didn't mean-"

April too deep breaths until she calmed down. "I'm okay. I'm okay."

"Perhaps you want to see how your guys are doing" Don offered. "Make sure they're all fed?"

April nodded. She stood "Show me, please."


	18. Chapter 18

"So I take it you guys won't be coming with us now you found a nice place AND your brother" Ted said before taking a huge bite out of his apple.

"You kidding? Of course we're going back!" Mikey replied. "We have a wedding to plan!"

"Exactly!" Raph smiled. "But I'll be staying here until Leo's well enough to leave."

"By the way, is he getting new eyes?" Ted asked. "After all, Mikester here got his arm, so..."

"Hey, that's April! I'mma go say hi!" Mikey hurried towards his human friend leaving Ted and Raph looking at him weirdly.

Raph turned back to Ted. "I was in the middle of talking about it when you guys turned up."

"You know, hate to change the subject but you should find out wha's bothering Mike. Seriously, he hadn't acted like this since he and Leo broke up"

Raph frowned. "Yeah, your probably right. It's not often he lets something bother him to the point of hating someone.. especially one of us."

"Better figure out fast. Don will want to have some kind of family reunion at some point and bad blood won't be a nice gift to bring"

"Alright, next moment I get with Mikey, I'll ask him." Raph said seriously.

 

Meanwhile, Mikey walked to Don and April hoping Raph or Ted wouldn't follow. He wasn't in the mood to talk about him and Leo, specially about Leo. 

"So you're not scared of Donnie-boy anymore?"

"I'm still a little apprehensive." April said. "But I'm willing to give him a chance."

"That's good enough for me" Don smiled. "I was just showing her around, make sure her guys are safe and sound"

"Awesome~ So, when do we head back? Angel's gonna love seeing you again"

"I... uh..."

"... what?"

Don rubbed the back of his neck. "I forgot to tell you... I can't leave"

"What?" April asked. "But.. but we need you."

"I'd love to go with you guys but there's stuff to do here. People need me" Don said.

"People need you? Your FAMILY needs you!" Mikey replied. "Bishop can take care of his base alone! If he wants a talking buddy he can clone a parrot!"

"Donnie.." April said. "If you think you cannot leave... how.. how many people can live here? In this base?"

"Not as many as your rebels but they're the clue to bring alien races here to Earth"

"Again, that's something Bishop can do alone!" Mikey argued. "If you wanna leave someone here, leave Leo"

"Why would I ever do that?" Don asked, frowning.

"Just... ugh who cares! The point is you have to come back! It's been 30 damn years, there's no way we're leaving you here!"

April sighed. She understood what leadership was like. "Mikey, if you want to stay with Donnie, then I'll understand. And just because he's here doesn't mean you can't go back and forth between us rebels and this base."

"This is not about splitting up, April. This is getting the family back together just like Splinter wanted!"

"I can't leave the rebels. Not until everything's peaceful." April said sadly.

"We could help you get those last ninja and their leader" Don said. "I can't assure I'd leave the base but my units-"

"- keep your units to yourself, Donatello!" Mikey cut him off abruptly. "If you're not coming back home then we might as well not owe you any favors"

Don scowled. "Do you think I'm doing this as a favor?! My god, Mikey, I can't believe you're so narrow minded!"

"I know this is hard Mikey, but just think of this as a small delay before we can all be happy together again." April said,

Mikey shot Don a dirty look before pushing past him on his way to the exercise area.

Don watched him go and sighed. "Why do I keep screwing things up?"

"To be honest, I haven't seen them in such a good mood for ages." April said.

"... your definition of good mood has changed over the years, I see"

"A lot changed." April said, patting his shell. "I shall spend time with my rebels now." She walked off, leaving Donnie to his thoughts.

\---

"Mikey." Raph shouted, catching up with him. "Hey, I need ta talk to you."

"If it's about convincing Don to leave this place, I'm all ears"

"Wait... what?" Raph blinked. "He.. he wants to stay here?"

Mikey threw a punch at the leather surface of a slightly battered punching bag. "He didn't tell you?"

"No- I assumed-" Raph clenched his fists. "I'll talk to him later. I just.. wanted to talk ta ya about... did something happen between Leo and yourself?"

"A lot of shit happened between us. You'll have to be more specific" Mikey said punching the bag harder.

"What were you two doing in the tunnel when your go ambushed." Raph said.

"Nothing"

"Did he hurt you?"

Mikey threw punches faster and harder. "No."

"Mikey..." Raph said. He came closer. "You know you can tell me."

"There's nothing to tell." Mikey grunted.

Raph softly touched his shell. "Mikey.. please.. let me in."

With a last punch, the bag almost fell off it's hinges. "... I don't deserve this..."

Raph nuzzled him softly. "Mikey, you know I love you. You deserve health and happiness."

Mikey pushed him away. "No, I don't deserve any of that! I don't deserve your love or to be alive, I don't deserve this fucking arm!"

"Mikey. What did Leo do to you." He cupped Mikey's face in his hands.

"... what I really deserve, ok? Is that what you wanted to hear? But he... he couldn't! He should've but he couldn't!"

Raph frowned. "He.. he didn't try to rape you... did he?"

Mikey laughed humorlessly. "Wish he had..."

"How... how c-could you say such a thing.."

Mikey shrugged. "I don't know... but I wouldn't have been against it"

"Oh Mikey.." Raph stroked his cheek. "It doesn't matter what you think, I KNOW you don't deserve something like that. T-take it from someone who's had it.."

"I knew about that night." Mikey mumbled.

"You did?" Raph said. He chuckled sadly. "Everyone seems to know before I tell them."

"Well, I-I suspected... besides you DID tell me before, only you were drunk"

"Oh.." Raph said. He sighed. "Mikey..." He stroked Mikey's cheek. "Thank you for not forcing me to tell you everything before I was ready."

"But I should've told Leo! I should've explained so he didn't hate you... it was my fault the family broke apart, Raph. Don't you see?"

"Oh Mikey.. you shouldn't blame that on you. It was my place to tell him, not you." He nuzzled Mikey softly. "I'm the one who should have been honest.." Raph then blinked. "W-wait, so Leo knew? Or knows now?" He sighed. "I guess it's a good thing. i know I'd never be ready to tell him myself."

"I don't know who told him but yes, he knows" Mikey sighed. "But he was right; I don't know pain like yours... probably I'll never will"

"And I never, ever want you to." He stroked Mikey's cheeks. He nuzzled him and kissed him softly.

Mikey tried to pull away but Raph's strong grip kept him in place. Soon their kiss deepened and so did their need to love each other. "W-we should find a room"

Raph picked Mikey up and carried him to the room Mikey had been given. He placed him on the bed and locked the door. He smiled and leaned over him, kissing him again. Mikey pulled him closer, needing to feel his brother's body crushing his. Mentally he thanked Don and the utroms for giving him his arm back, now he could explore more of Raph's body. On the other hand, he felt terrible; there he was, receiving love and attention he didn't deserve.   
But he was selfish, oh so selfish.

"... selfish..." He muttered hoping Raph wouldn't hear him.

"Mikey..." Raph whispered. "Sometimes its good to be selfish.." He stroked Mikey's body. He kissed him over and over again.

"N-no... don't... don't deserve...~"

"Shhh.." Raph kissed down his front. "You do.."

Mikey arched his back when Raph stopped at his slit and licked at it, trying to part the soft cartilage. Raph kissed and suckled it. He checked the bedside draw and found lube. "W-wow.. haven't seen real lube in a long time."

"There's lube in here?" Mikey asked, looking up at Raph's hand. "... holy shit..."

Raph grinned. "Man, it's amazing. You forget stuff exists until ya see it again." He pushed a generous amount on his finger before rubbed it against Mikey's entrance. He slowly pushed his finger in. "Oh wow, I can feel how much easier that is."

"Y-yeah~ Shit, I'd forgotten how good that felt~"

Raph rubbed against Mikey's sweet spot. He churred, seeing Mikey squirm. He used his other hand to rub at Mikey's hidden pocket. Mikey stopped Raph. "H-hang on, let me do it. I wanna test my new arm"

Raph pulled his hand away. "Sure~" He poured a little lube on Mikey's hand for him

Feeling the bulge growing bellow his new hand was a bit strange at first, it almost was as if someone else was touching him. Mikey kept rubbing himself until he coaxed his hot rod out.

Raph tilted his head, rubbing Mikey’s sweet spot more as he watched Mikey explore with his new hand. He was so, so happy to see Mikey with it. Mikey moaned and clenched around Raph's finger. Touching himself with his new hand and his lover's gentle prep job had been too much for him to handle.

Raph licked up him cum. "Wow, that must have felt really good~" He pulled back, removing his finger. He showed Mikey his bulging pocket. "Wanna use that fancy new hand on this?~"

"You really have to ask?" Mikey grinned and cupped a feel.

Raph shivered. He dropped down. Mikey's new hand had no calluses.

"How does that feel, Raphie?" Mikey purred.

"A-amazing~" Raph rocked his hips a little, panting.

"Yeah~ Just like baby skin~" Mikey said, pulling Raph's cock out and stroking it. "Damn, feels so warm~"

Raph panted. He leaned over and kissed Mikey over and over again as he rocked his hips. Mikey could feel Raph's cock throbbing and twitching, he was going to cum soon but he didn't want it to be like this. He stopped his ministrations earning a little growl from Raph.

Raph opened his eyes, dazed a little from the stop of pleasure. He pushed Mikey legs back apart. "Y-you ready?"

Mikey nodded, licking his lips. "It'll be easier now we used lube~"

Raph pushed in slowly and moaned deeply, nearly cumming. "S-shit... yeah it is~"

"W-wait, stay there~" Mikey churred. "Wanna feel you~"

Raph bit his lip, trying to stay still. It was difficult because Mikey felt so warm. "Mikey~"

Mikey smiled up at him, seeing him struggling to not let himself loose. Even if he didn't deserve it, he appreciated Raph's concern for his needs.

"C-Can I move now?" Raph asked, his cock throbbing in need so badly that Mikey could feel it.

"Sure, big guy~ Knock yourself out~"

Raph moaned in relief as he began to move. Slow but hard. He leaned over Mikey and kissed him over and over again. With both hands now, Mikey reached lower so he could grab Raph's ass. Raph churred at that. "That feels much better~" He moved faster, nibbling Mikey's neck.

Mikey winced a little but focused on the pleasure. "F-fuck~ Raphie, you've been training your ass or what? D-damn it feels solid~"

Raph chuckled. "Maybe~" He nuzzled his brother lovingly, licking his neck. He slammed into Mikey's sweet spot more and more. The smaller turtle felt his climax approaching but held back, this time he wanted Raph to enjoy himself to the fullest.

Raph leaned down and kissed Mikey deeply as he came deep inside Mikey's thrust staggering but not stopping. Mikey's new hand dove between their bodies and he stroked himself to completion.

Raph broke the kiss slowly. He smiled. "Feel better?"

In theory he DID feel better but deep within things were very different. But what was another white for his brother's sake?

"Yeah, it was great."

Raph kissed Mikey's forehead. "Wanna just cuddle for a bit?"

Mikey snorted. "Dude, if you offer me cuddles then it's NOT going to be for a bit"

"Fine by me. I'm supposed to be resting anyway." Raph settled down with Mikey and pulled him closer with his uninjured arm.

"... maybe I didn't feel your pain, Raph, but I did feel your fear." Mikey mumbled.

"Mikey..." Raph nuzzled him. "I never wanted you to feel that.."

"It was necessary, though" Mikey replied. "Don says what Leo did was just trying to prove his point... and I think he did prove his point even though his... his methods were so drastic"

"Doesn't excuse what he did." Raph said. He nuzzled Mikey more, kissing the top of his head.

Mikey hid his face on Raph's neck. "... I called him the next Shredder. Not literally but... yeah..."

"Oh Mikey.." Raph said, stroking his head. "S-seems like both of you went too far.."

Mikey nodded. "Do you think he'll still hate me?"

"I doubt he'll ever hate you as much as he hates me." Raph said. "And who knows now that Donnie's back- or when his eyesight is fixed. He might be more like his older self. Or a new, less dick-ish self.

That made Mikey smile. "One would think that the best ninja at blindfolded training would tolerate not being able to see on a regular basis"

"Dude, I think he actually gets a kick out of it." Raph chuckled. "Anyone else would have jumped at the chance to have their eyesight back."

"I do want him to see us again, or at least Angel in her wedding dress" Mikey said stifling a yawn.

"Or Donnie." Raph said, stroking Mikey's shell.

"Yeah... 's nice to have him back" Mikey said, his eyes closing.

"Very nice to have him back." Raph nuzzled Mikey, his eyes closing too. He yawned and was soon snoring softly.


	19. Chapter 19

"So.. he'll be having his eyesight surgery in a few minutes?" Raph asked, sitting beside the sleeping Leo.

"Doctor said we can't wait much longer" Don said. "It's now or never"

Raph nodded. "Okay." He stroked Leo's cheek softly. "Let's get this done then." He stepped out of the way for the doctors to take Leo.

"Let's hope he doesn't freak out when he wakes up again" Don sighed.

"He probably will." Raph said. He looked to Donnie. "But this time I'll be here."

Don tilted his head to the door and walked outside with Raph following him behind. 

"So, I take it you and Mikey enjoyed my little gift?"

Raph rubbed his head, trying to understand. He then blushed "Ohh! Yes! A lot. Haven't seen or used lube in nearly 30 years."

"Your sex life must've been difficult" Don chuckled.

Raph smiled a little. "Well definitely a lot rougher, that's for sure."

"If I recall, you liked it better that way" The genius smirked.

Raph grinned. "So did you."

"Heh... yeah..."

There was this awkward moment of silence between them, only interrupted by the voices of Bishop's staff on the first floor. Raph blinked and looked around. "S-So how long will the surgery take?"

"I'm not sure, didn't want to ask" Don said, crossing his arms. "I'm worried enough as it is"

"Y-yeah... so.. will he like.. wake up for good after this?" Raph asked. "I know they've cleaned and fixed his shell.."

"Again, I'm not sure. They now know the correct dose of sedatives and medicine for him but ... only time can tell"

Raph pulled Donnie closer. "You know, I'm so glad you're alive." He nuzzled him. "I forgot how wonderful you are."

"Not as much as you are" Don nuzzled him back. "You know... I did promise I'd make it up to tonight~"

Raph churred. "Why not now? It would make the time pass."

"Is that the only reason? If I wasn't feeling this happy, I'd feel really offended"

"Then let me put it this way-" Raph grinned. He suddenly picked Donnie up. "Let me make sweet love to you because I love you and missed you."

Don smiled shyly, his face reddening. "My room is soundproof, we could go there~"

Raph grinned. "Sounds good to me." He followed Donnie's directions until he got to Donnie's room. He almost dropped Donnie when he saw it. It looked like a studio apartment.

"Do you like it?" Don asked.

The room was almost like the one Don had back in their old lair only bigger and with lots of trinkets and gizmos as well as notes, books and experiments. It also had a tantalizingly soft bed, like the one Don always fantasized about.

"Its.. its amazing.." Raph walked over and carefully placed Donnie down. "Shit, Bishop likes to pamper you, doesn't he."

"He wanted me to feel like home when I woke up, something about making this experience less traumatic I think."

"Uh-hu." Raph snorted. "Sure he hasn't got the hots for you or something?"

Don slapped him on the shoulder. "You're killing the mood here, Raphael!"

"Sorry, sorry." Raph said. To really apologize he took Donnie's foot in his hand and began to massage. Donnie never could resist a massage.

"Nice try but you'll have to do better than that" Don teased.

Raph smirked. "What would you like then?"

"I don't know~ You're the Donnie expert, remember? I think that's how Leo called you." Don chuckled.

Raph chuckled too. He pushed Donnie's legs apart and began to suckle on Donnie's tail without warning. Don gave out a cute little yelp that had Raph churring and grinning mischievously. Raph kept suckling and licked at Donnie's opening. He massaged Donnie's legs as he did.

Don had trouble getting rid of his gear with his shaky hands; he'd waited so long for this moment and he wanted it to be perfect, just like 30 years ago. "Your jacket... get rid of it!"

Raph did so without having to remove his mouth. His tongue only got more intense with 30 years of practice. Don fisted the bed sheets, moaning in pleasure. "Y-you've been practicing~"

"30 years I've been practicing." Raph smirked. He went back to licked, even pushing his tongue into Donnie.

If Raph had used his finger, Don would've probably try to stop him for he wasn't as loose as before but he didn't seem to have any problem accepting Raph's tongue. "Raph... stop, stop..."

Raph pulled back. "Everything okay?"

"Y-yeah yeah, it's just... just lay down, please?" Gently Don guided Raph to lay on the soft bed so he could straddle his bigger lover. "First of all, you didn't do anything wrong so, you can relax now"

Raph smiled and did relaxe. "You had me worried then." He stroked Donnie's wonderful hips

"I'm sorry for that but you need to know things are... different" Don tried to explain. "I... I'm... sorta like... a virgin again?"

"Oh.." Raph said. He smiled. "I'll be gentle then."

Now it was Don's turn to relax. Smiling down at his partner, he caressed his perfect, thick neck and broad shoulders. Raph took Donnie's hand and kissed it softly, churring kindly. Olive green fingers soon came in contact with a puckered, long scar. Don's smile faded as he found another and another; there was no patch of skin that wasn't left untouched by scars.

"So many..." He whispered.

Raph smiled sadly, "It's over now though.." he stroked Donnie's face softly.

Don leaned over and kissed the longest and bad looking of the scars, right on his left shoulder. "This would've never happened if it wasn't because of me"

"Donnie.." Raph said sympathetically. "You can't change things.."

Don sighed heavily. "Sometimes I wish I could"

Raph leaned up and kissed Donnie lovingly. Don returned the kiss just as softly, letting his hands caress Raph's arms. They were more toned, bigger even; the genius churred at the thought of those powerful limbs embracing him so tightly he'd be left breathless.

"We could cuddle all night if you're too nervous."

"Are you holding back now, Raphie~?" Don purred, rubbing his ass against Raph's bulge.

Raph churred loudly. He pulled Donnie closer and kissed him deeply. He pushed Donnie onto back and rubbed his slit. This felt so much better, Raph taking charge of the situation, showing him his natural dominance over his not so fragile frame. Don spread his legs and let Raph slid between them- a perfect fit. Raph belonged there, he was always meant to be there- to be his and vice versa. Raph smiled, breaking the kiss. He rubbed his own hidden pocket, dropping down after a moment. He rubbed his cock against Donnie's own hidden pocket.

Don looked down, licking his lips. "Is it just me or you got thicker~?"

Raph grinned. "Hey, I'm much bigger everywhere else so probably~" He leaned down and started to lap and lick at it.

"L-let me taste it~" Don requested shamelessly.

Raph smiled. He lay down and rolled Donnie onto him. Soon they were 69ing and Raph used his tongue to drive Donnie crazy. Don bobbed his head, his tongue lapping and swirling around Raph's cock, the taste still drove him crazy just as Raph's tongue. He pulled back and licked the head, tasting precum, then engulfed the throbbing organ again. Raph churred loudly as he also deep-throated Donnie. He shivered in delight. He had missed Donnie do much. Missed his taste and smell and softness.

Don pulled back making a loud 'pop' sound. "Raphie, please take me~"

Raph shifted. "Where's the lube?"

"Top drawer" Don said laying on his shell. "Same as before"

Raph leaned forwards and grabbed it out the draw. He then covered his finger. "If it hurts, tell me." He took Donnie's cock in his other and rubbed. He circled his lubed finger against Donnie's entrance.

Don tensed up when Raph's finger started breaching him and gave a little cry when the knuckle tried to get in. Raph gave Donnie's cock a couple of licks, pulling his finger back. He applied more lube and pushed back in. Don blindly searched for Raph's free hand and intertwined their fingers.

Raph held his hand, tight with love. "Are you okay?"

Don nodded, fighting to calm his breathing. "Yes~ F-Feels good~"

Raph smiled and pushed his finger in more. He still remembered when Donnie's sweet spot was and took full advantage of it. So many years might had passed by but the reaction was the same. The genius arched his back as much as his shell would allow him and he moaned his lover's name loudly.

Raph's cock got harder at the sound. His heart pounded. He gave Donnie's cock a long lick as he rubbed that sweet spot more. Don rocked his hips, taking more of that talented finger inside of him, the annoying mild burn completely ignored.

"Y-you think your ready?" Raph asked between licks.

"Mmhmm~ Go ahead before I cum, Raphie~"

Raph pulled out his finger. He then covered his cock in lube before slowly pushing it in. "Shhhhiiiiit! So tight!"

They moaned in unison as Raph breached him and stopped until he was fully sheathed, giving Don time to adjust. Small tears gathered in the corner of Don's eyes and his grip on the bedsheets was really strong.

"Shh... its okay." Raph leaned down and kissed the tears away. "I won't move until you tell me to."

Don hiccuped and nuzzled Raph. ".. j-just like our first time... b-back then it ... it also hurt this bad~"

Raph smiled a little and nuzzled back. He began to rub Donnie's cock again. "And you look just as beautiful."

Don laughed quietly, wincing a little. "Keep talking to me~ Love your voice~"

"I love you. I love you so much. You're so wonderful~" Raph churred. He rocked his hips a tiny bit

"I-I'm not that great~" Don whimpered. "B-but thank you"

"Yes you a-are." He grabbed Donnie's hips and began to rock more.

Don cried out, this time because his spot was hit with deadly accuracy. He felt Raph stopping and he growled. "Don't you dare stop now!"

"The turtles get w-what he wants~" He began to pound into Donnie's sweet spot over and over again,

"FUCK! YES~ YES, RAPH!" The normally shy turtle sounded "like a bitch in heat" as Raph would say and it was turning him on quickly.

"Fuuccckk~!" He banged Donnie harder. He had missed Donnie's voice so much. He grabbed Donnie's cock and rubbed his hard and fast too. Their moans and loud panting, skin slapping against skin and Raph's hand making obscene wet noises echoed in the room. It was too much for Don. 

"R-RAPH! RAPHIE~ FUCK, I'M GONNA CUM!"

"I wanna see you cum! Cum for me!" Raph said, moving harder. "DONNIE!"

Don clenched hard around Raph's cock, screaming at the top of his lungs as he came. Long spurts of warm cum landed on his lover's plastron, his own and some drops hit Raph's chin.

Raph gave a few more staggered thrust and cum. "DONNIE! FUUUCK! I LOVE YOU!" He emptied out into Donnie's ass as if he was saving up cum for years. Don took everything greedily, moaning and clenching to milk everything Raph had in store for him.

Raph slumped next to Donnie and churred very loudly. "Waited 30 years to do that again.. so worth the wait."

Don nodded, breathing in the smell of sex and Raph's mask deeply.

"I love you"

"I love you too, Raphie~ So much~" Don smiled sleepily, turning his head to nuzzle Raph.

Raph nuzzled back. "Sleep." He pulled him closer. He yawned, closing his eyes.

"I kinda don't wanna~" Don yawned. "Feels so good I don't want it to be a dream."

Raph smiled. "If it is, then its the best dream I've ever had."

"I got the perfect way to end it~" Don whispered and leaned in for a sweet kiss. Raph kissed back sweetly, stroking Donnie's hips. He was asleep before he knew it.


	20. Chapter 20

"Agent Bishop, the rebel leader wants to see you"

Bishop had been expecting this. "Send her in."

April entered, looking cleaner and smelling better. "Just wanted to thank you personally for what you did for my family and my rebels."

"No thanks needed." Bishop said. "I know it seems strange but I've been here helping people in secret as best I could. However, I had to stay out of retch of Saki because he needed my technology and resources to get off planet."

"It's kinda what Don told me, only I just didn't want to listen" April smiled weakly.

"Completely understandable." Bishop said. "Now, the Utroms will be putting me in charge of earth for a while. I was hoping that Donatello could be my secound in command but I fear his need to look after his brothers might make it difficult for him. Then I had an idea." He looked to April. "I was wondering if you wanted to be secound in command and the I can make Donatello an adviser."

"What did Don say about that? I mean, being second in command"

"He said it would be a honor. But I feel he might rather be with his brothers. I have yet to suggest the idea to him though." Bishop said.

"Well... I was never into politics" April said. "I dunno, I might have to talk to him"

"Either way I will be giving you command over your own unit to help take care of the rest of Saki's men."

"Right. So, I assume the guys will be staying here until Leo's healed."

"Of course." Bishop said.

April nodded. "Ok... and can I trust in you to keep them alive, no funny games?"

"No funny games." Bishop smiled a little. "I know I haven't earnt trust, but I won't hurt them."

The woman arched a brow. "... alright... I'll leave them here then but I'll be coming regularly to check up on them"

"You're more than welcome. I'll even give you a vehicle if it makes you feel better." Bishop said.

"That's ok, I prefer walking. Has kept my heart pumping perfectly these last 30 years." April said, grinning.

"To be honest I had no had a human heart for a couple of hundred years. I no longer remember what it's like to have to keep a body well exercised."

"Yeah... I so didn't' need to know that." The redhead chortled. "Keep an eye on my turtles, Bishop. I'll be back soon."

"I will." Bishop said before turning back to his work.

A soldier came in shortly after April left. "Sir, there's news from Hamato Leonardo"

"What is it?" Bishop said, looking up.

"The surgery was a success and Doctor Zilx believes he should be waking up in a couple of days"

"Good, good." Bishop smiled. "I shall inform his brothers."

\--

Outside the infirmary, Mikey watched doctors coming in and out sticking needles in his brother, re-wrapping his eyes and writing down notes. Leonardo didn't look alive at all, Mikey could tell he must've been feeling very weak and tired.

"Hey." Raph said, walking over. "How is he doing?" Raph stroked Mikey's shell softly.

"He's alive, I think"

"Doctors said he'd be asleep for a while." Raph looked to Mikey. "How are you doing?"

"Good. Where's Don?"

Raph grinned "Sleeping~"

"... oohh, you sly turtles you~" Mikey laughed. "How was it?"

Raigh sighed happily. "So good~ He was like a virgin again." He smiled. "Next time you'll have to join us. I'm interested to see what a threesome is like."

"Aw dammit, you got to him before me again" Mikey pouted slightly. "Nah, just kidding. I'm glad you two are together." Raph kissed Mikey's temple. Mikey could tell Raph was much happier now.

"April just left, you know?"

"She took a lot of the rebels home."

Mikey nodded. "Well, most of the one's that stayed don't really have a family. I wonder what's Angel going to say when she realizes we didn't go back"

"Honestly.. I think she'll understand." Raph said. "Especially while Leo's still recovering."

“You think so?"

"Yes." Raph said. "She's reasonable. And it doesn't mean she can't video call us."

"Yeah, you're right"

A nurse came out of Leo's room. "Mr. Raphael?"

"Yes?" Raph said, walking into the room

"Agent Bishop wants to talk with you and your brothers"

"Alright. Where?"

"His office. Please follow me"

Raph and Mikey began to follow the nurse. They entered Bishop's office and sat down where instructed. "Oh good, you are here" Bishop said, entering the office. "Have you seen your brother Leonardo already?"

"We were about to when you called for us." Raph said

"Is there a problem, Bishop?" Mikey asked. 

"On the contrary, I want to let you know about my conversation with Mrs. Jones" Bishop sat down. "As you know, I offered your brother Donatello the position of second in command on the new world order until elections decided who else should run things around here"

Raph nodded. "Yeah.. Donnie mentioned something about having a duty here.."

“Well, Mrs. Jones believes Donatello might want to stay with his brothers which would make him change his mind about those duties"

"Whoa there, he's not giving up" Mikey said. "We wouldn't let him."

But do you think your brother would accept that?"

"No.." Raph said. "Do you have any idea who might be good for the roll? Maybe Mortu?"

"Actually, Mrs. Jones agreed to take Donatello's place. That would make him my advisor but he would be able to stay with you three"

Raph grinned. "Really?"

Bishop nodded. "I would need Donatello's approval before the meeting in a few weeks"

"You'll have to wait for him to wake up from his nap" Mikey chuckled, elbowing Raph.

Raph smirked. "Yeah, I'll take ta him when he wakes up. But I wanna be there for Leo for a while. So Mikey, maybe you could tell him.

"Excellent. Now there's something else I have to tell you." Bishop added.

"What is it?"

"I've noticed over the years your bond hasn't been the same" Bishop commented. 

"We are trying to fix that." Mikey replied. 

"I know but it might not be enough" Bishop said. "I want to offer you some of the best psychological treatment to help you fight whatever demons remain inside"

Raph froze up. After a moment he jumped out of his chair. "I don't need any shrink help! I'm fine!"

"Calm down, Raphael. That was not meant to be offensive"

Raph went quiet but crossed his arm. He silently asked for more explanation.

"To put it simple: you've all gone through tough shit. You've had to do horrible things to survive and you've seen things no human has ever seen" Bishop said. "I believe you need to let it all out, the four of you, in order to have a normal life as a family"

"He does have a point" Mikey said.

Raph grunted in agreement. "So who's gonna be the shrink?"

"Can't we have our friend Ted instead of some random doc? I mean, no offense but I'd be more comfortable talking to someone I know it's not going to be judgemental"

"No one here will judge you, I can assure you that but if you'd like I've heard your friend Theodore is a psychologist." Bishop said.

Raph looked away from Mikey. "Ted finds it hard to not let things affect him though, since he knows us.."

"We'll let him work with us and scramble our brains or whatever." Mikey said. "But thanks for the offer anyway."

Raph rubbed his face, He knew the moment Donnie knew it had been suggested, that the genious would push for him to get help

"As soon as Leonardo wakes up, I'll have a room ready for the treatment.

Mikey nodded. "Just one thing, no one will be recording our sessions, right?"

Bishop shook his head. "I promise you no cameras will be allowed in that room"

Raph relaxed a little. "Alright, Is there anything else?"

"Not at the moment. I believe you will want to see Leonardo now so I won't keep you here any longer"

"One more thing, is there a chance you have a secret wedding dress shop here?"

Bishop looked at him questioningly. "Is there a reason why I should?"

"You have a lot of people living here." Raph said. "But I believe what my brother is asking is... is there somewhere or someone who can make a wedding dress?"

"Is one of you getting married or something?"

"A friend of ours is" Mikey said. "We thought about scavenging one for her but it's her special day and we'd want her dress to be the best and preferably clean"

"We know it would mean a lot to her." Raph said.

"Honestly, the few couples that do get married do so wearing what they have." Bishop said. "Maybe if you ask around the base someone can offer you their services"

Raph thought back to the maid that served them food. He wondered if she knew how to sew. Last time she had mentioned something about sewing. "Yes please."

"You are free to walk around and leave as you pleased. I told Mrs. Jones you wouldn't be kept against your will. Now if you'll excuse me, there's a meeting I must attend to"

Raph pulled Mikey out of the room with him. "Alright, I'm gonna go and watch over Leo. Maybe you can spend time with Donnie."

"Dude, we didn't even say bye" Mikey replied. "I know Bishop was a real douche back in the days but dude, manners"

Raph rubbed his neck in embarrassment,"Yeah.. ya right.."

Mikey snorted and leaned up to kiss Raph's nose. "It's ok, big guy. I'll go wake Donnie up."

Raph smiled and headed off to Leo's room. Once there, he sat by Leo's bed and took his hand, stroking it softly. The machines keep control of Leo's vitals were the only sounds in the room. Taking a closer look, his eldest brother looked frail- the total opposite of the once strong, fearless leader he once was.

"Leo.." Raph sighed. "I'm sorry I've been such a dick for the last 30 years. I know now that you were right.. w-we had to leave Splinter b-behind.."

Years later he would've expected a response, a miracle that somehow made Leo bounce back immediately so he wasn't talking to a seemingly dead turtle. 30 years later and his worst nightmare had come to pass. Leo wasn't responding and he wouldn't do so after he decided to wake up. Raph stroked Leo's head and went silent.

\---

 

Mikey knocked at Donnie's door. Or what he hoped was Donnie's door.

"Come in" Don's voice came out.

Mikey walked in. He closed the door behind him and look around. "Whoa... dude! This place is amazing." He then frowned. "How come I get a little cell-like room and you get a condo apartment?"

Don almost dropped his screwdriver. "... say what"

Mikey walked into the apartment. "Yeah, well, me and Raph have been sharing it."

Don sighed, standing up. "Ok why do I get the feeling I'm working with retards! I said I wanted the best room for you! My god!"

"Oh..." Mikey said. He sat on the couch. "I'd be happy just sleep on this couch!"

"No nono, you're sleeping in my room!" Don argued. "I'll make the staff bring another bed"

"And Raphie?" Mikey said. He stretched happily on the most comfortable couch he had ever felt.

"Well my bed is big enough for two. I hope you don't mind to share"

"I'm fine~" Mikey smiled. "So, how was sleeping with Raph?"

"It was just like I imagined it would be" Don sighed dreamily.

Mikey let out a churr. "Raph says he wants a threesome next time~"

Don laughed, shaking his head. "Oh god, I've unleashed a beast"

"A sexy beast!" Mikey churred happily

“It does sound like a great idea. Maybe next time and we can include Leo, make it into a foursome~ What do you say?"

Mikey's expression fell. "I.. I dont think that will happen."

"Is this because of what Leo did?" Don asked.

"Even before that it would be impossible. He just..." Mikey rubbed his face. "I hope him getting back his eyesight and finding out you're alive will make him better,,,"

Don nodded understandingly. "You know, maybe he could have therapy before talking to you and Raph"

"Bishop offered therapy to us." Mike mused. "Out of all of us I think Leo needs it the most."

"Then we'll start with him... wait, did you say all of us?"

"Well, me and Raph but if you wanted some I'm sure you could get some." Mikey said

Don blinked. "I didn't know Bishop thought I needed a psychologist..."

Mikey shrugged. "He probably just wants to make sure we're all okay."

"... I guess so"

Mikey rolled off the couch and walked over to Donnie. He gave his brother a hug. "You don’t have ta do it. I doubt Raph will."

"But we have to do this" Don replied. "It's the only way we'll finally heal and maybe I'll have a chance to explain myself better"

Mikey rubbed Donnie's back. "Okay."

The genius smiled. "Hey, I want to show you something"

"Oh?" Mikey said, smiling. "What is it?"

Don grabbed his hand and took him to a room Mikey was so familiar with- or would be after he saw it. "You're going to love this so much"

Mikey stepped inside the room. "Whoa..."

The cheesy repetitive music of 8bit games welcomed the orange and purple clad turtles. Mikey could recognize some of his old videogames there but most of them were new and the equipment had never been touched. Mikey covered his mouth, trying to hold back a sob. He hadn't played a video games in 30 years- not one of these anyway.

"Well?"

"D-Donnie, it's amazing!" He hugged his brother tightly. "T-Thank you!"

"Mikey, that's my neck. I need my neck, I need to breathe" Don chuckled, trying to breathe.

"Woopsie!" Mikey let go, blushing a little in basement.

"I knew I'd done a good job but wow, your reaction!" Don laughed. "Go ahead! That's all yours"

Mikey squealed in delight and went over to the Dragon's Lair one. He felt more like his younger self than he had done in years as he played. Don followed him, watching him play. A smile decorated his features.

After a couple of plays, Mikey pulled back from the games with a big grin. "Dude, how did you even manage this? Its like you brought the old world with ya!!"

"That's what you get for saving and befriending a creepy, ex-xenophobic government agent"

"Yeah, he is creepy." Mikey shudder. He smiled and walked over to Donnie. He stroked Donnie's cheek. "I love ya."

Don leaned in so they could touch noses. "Love you too, sweetie~"

Mikey rubbed noses for a moment before kissing him. His baby brother definitely had gotten better at kissing, he was more daring and passionate but still sweet.

Mikey stroked Donnie's hips and churred. He broke the kiss slowly. "I want to make you feel good~"

"Oh? And what do you have in mind, baby brother~?"

Mikey grinned. "I want your other virginity~" He rubbed Donnie's hidden pocket.

Don blushed, coughing a little. "Y-you sure? I haven't used that in a while"

"Heh, I'm willing to teach you~"

"Oh really?" Don pressed himself closer against Mikey's hand. "Well, I'm all for learning~"

Mikey churred. "Shall we take this in your room?"

"Why not here~ You used to have fantasies of fucking in a futuristic room, didn't you?"

Mikey chuckled. "Maybe years ago. Now.." He rubbed where his new arm joined his old body.

Don put his hand over Mikey's. "... allow me to fulfill that fantasy. Please~"

Mikey suddenly looked nervous. His instincts alarm was ringing, since he'd be vulnerable around machines. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself.

Don noticed this and kissed him softly. "They're not alive, my baby. I am. Focus on me"

Mikey did. He smiled a little. "Y-you're gonna make me do it here as some sort a therapy getting-over-my-fear thing, aren't you?"

Don shrugged. "We can go back to my room, if you'd like"

Mikey nodded. "I'd p-prefer that-" He eyed the machines. Donnie hadn't realised how bad this technophobia was for Mikey. Don took Mikey to lean on a retro pinball machine. He kissed him deeply, caressing his hips.Mikey was hesitant at first but soon got into the kissing. He churred softly, stroking Donnie's cheek.

Don's hand went directly to play with Mikey's tail, his favorite thing to do during foreplay. Mikey churred louder. He opened his legs more, his own hand rubbed Donnie's hidden pocket. Don churred back, his tongue playing with Mikey's to distract him more.

Mikey let out a sweet moan. He slipped down as he was unable to resist his tail being played with. Don chuckled and pulled at the tiny appendage. Mikey hooked his leg up, rubbing his hardening cock as Donnie played with his tail.

"You like that?" Don purred, breaking the kiss.

"Y-yeah~" He panted a little. "Y-your hands are so soft~"

"These old things? Nah, they're not~" Don nibbled Mikey's neck. Mikey gasped. He moaned more. Don kept playing and teasing Mikey before he tickled his entrance.

Mikey smiled and nuzzled Donnie, "My turn~" He got onto his knees and began to lick and suckle at Donnie's hidden pocket. Don churred in appreciation, resting his hands on Mikey's head. Mikey suckled on Donnie's hidden pocket. He stroked his legs, churring.

Don's flesh, hard and throbbing, came out of hiding to come in contact with Mikey's talented mouth. Mikey deep throated him straight away. He bobbed his head fast.

"Y-yeah~ Just like that~" Don moaned.

Mikey pulled back after a couple of minutes and turned around. "If you want more goodness, you'll have to fuck me~"

"Shit, I knew I'd forgotten something." Don slapped himself. "The lube!"

Mikey blinked. "Oh.. oh yea lube.. wait." He retched into his belt. "I... I kinda stole the one from that room we were in."

"Oh Mikey, you sneaky little ninja~" Don purred accepting the bottle.

"Hey, I was NEVER gonna let an amazingly rare thing like lube just be left in a draw."

"... you HAVE been living without this thing far too long" Don said, pouring a generous amount on his finger to slowly breach Mikey.

Mikey groaned happily. Having lube felt so good to him he didn't feel the pain. "Fuuuck~"

"And that was just my finger~" Don chuckled.

Mikey churred. "Please~ D-Don't tease me~"

"Oh but where's the fun if I don't tease you a little~"

Mikey shivered at Donnie tone. He rocked his hips, whining for more. "On your stomach, face the pinball machine" Don ordered huskily.

Mikey did. He looked at the pinball machine and closed his eyes tight. "It's just a p-pin ball machine-" He mumbled over and over again.

Don pretended to ignore Mikey's distress and instead rubbed his tail, distracting him.

Mikey moaned softly. "P-please~ Donnie~"

"Open your eyes, Mikey. I want you to look at the machine."

Mikey resisted at first but did after a few minutes. He shook his head. "D-Donnie..?"

"Shhh, don't close your eyes" Don said, inserting another finger in the tight entrance .

Mikey squeaked slightly, drool running down his chin and onto the glass of the pinball machine. Don leaned over and nuzzled his neck, his fingers going in and out, stretching Mikey. Mikey moaned and made odd sounds. He was caught between his fear of being vulnerable around machines and how good Donnie's finger felt.

"How are you feeling?"

Mikey just made a number of disparate sounds, bucking against Donnie's finger.

Don grinned. "You want more?"

"Yeess~!" Mikey moaned loudly. "Please Donnie, I w-want you."

Don removed his fingers slowly and replaced the gap with his cock, moaning at the delicious warmth. Mikey cried out, feeling his sweet spot smashed into. "DONNIE~!"

"D-did I get it already?"

"Yyyeessss~" Mike squirmed, needing more.

Don rocked his hips making sure he hit that spot again. He smiled when Mikey tensed up and churred. Mikey panted and moaned, rocking back. He began to churr loudly, finally letting go of the fact he was surrounded by machines.

"L-look around you, Mikey~" Don panted. "What do you see?"

"M-Machines-" Mikey panted.

"That's correct~ Now tell me, are they moving?"

Mikey shook his head. "N-No.."

"Are they breathing?"

"No-" Mikey said, screwing his eyes shut.

Don pinched Mikey's tail, stopping his thrusts. "Keep your eyes open."

Mikey forced his eyes open. "O-Okay." He rocked his hips back.

Don rubbed the youngest's tail apologetically and continued thrusting. "You see, Michelangelo, machines aren't something to be afraid of. They can't breathe or eat or love like we do. Like I do~"

"T-That's the problem-" Mikey whimpered. "They don't feel- t-they just destroy and they don't die!"

"Not all of them are bad, Mikey" Don said softly. "Machines helped Bishop bring me back, machines kept me alive and machines have given you joy in the past! Like your video games, virtual reality, that vibrator you loved so much-"

Mikey blushed. Nobody had vibrators anymore. Batteries were hard to come by. "I'd f-forgotten about t-that."

Don moved harder and faster. "Fuck~! M-Mikey, there's... nothing... ahnn nothing to be afraid of!"

Mikey chured and whine with how good it felt. He retched between his legs and pumped himself. "I'm g-gonna-" He panted.

Don's hand joined his, teasing the head with his fingers. Mikey couldn't take it. He came all over Donnie's hand and the floor. Don joined him next, filling Mikey's insides with cum. Mikey pulled off and slumped to his knees panting. He rested his forehead against the pinball machine.

Don knelt beside him. "Everything ok?"

Mikey nodded a little, "C-can I l-lay down now?"

Don smiled. "Yes but not here" He helped Mikey get up on his feet and took him to his room.

Mikey rolled onto the bed, shaking from the extreme therapy. Don sat beside him, stroking his head. "Hopefully Ted's therapy is a lot better and less invasive. I think I went too far"

Mikey pulled Donnie closer to him. He rested his head in Donnie lap, curling up. "... was that too much?" Don asked softly.

Mikey nodded a little. He clung on tighter to Donnie. "B-but I enjoyed it."

"I don't think you did" Don replied. "... but thanks for trying to make me feel better."

Mikey looked up at him. "NO! I really did! The sex part was fucking awesome." He sat up, pulling himself together.

Don chuckled. "You've been hanging out with Raph way too much, you're talking like him. Then he looked at Mikey. "Seriously Mikey, I'm sorry for that"

Mikey leaned up and suddenly kissed Donnie deeply

"Wow... what was that for?" Don asked, blushing brightly.

"Because I love you~~" Mikey smiled, wagging his tail.

"Awww, there's the sweet Mikey I know" Don cupped his brother's cheeks. "And lookie your widdle tail~"

Mikey churred. He wagged his tail more. As he did, Donnie's cum dribbled down his legs

"You're a hot mess right now~ Wish we could have another round~"

“Why can't we~"

Don churred grinning mischievously, tackling Mikey to the bed.


	21. Chapter 21

 

_ 'Where am I... what's going on... why is it all so dark...' _

 

He felt his hand squeezed. "Leo." Raph's strong, but kind voice whispered.

 

_ '... Raph?... Raph's here? _ '

 

Leo realised that Raph was talking to him without expecting a reply. As if he'd been talking to him for hours.

 

"I promise you, when you wake up everything will be better." Raph said. "It already is a lot, lot better. We're safe, well fed.." He nuzzled Leo softly. "Mikey's new arm is becoming stronger by the day.."

 

_ '... what... what kind of sick nightmare is this?! Where's Angel!' _

 

Raph stroked Leo's hand more. "I know it's gonna be a bit strange but... it's all because of Donnie coming back. He was in a coma for 30 years after saving Bishop from Saki and getting nearly killed in the process. As such, Bishop's a good guy. I was suspicious at first but.. Bishop's given all the rebels food, clothes, healthcare and even given April a small army to command." He blabbered on.

 

The tiny Leo inside his head just covered his ears and rocked back on fort. 

 

_ 'Lies... all lies... where am I? Where's father?!' _

 

Raph let out a sigh. "I know I've said this a few times now but.. I really do forgive you. I know now leaving Master Splinter was the only option. We'd all be dead if we stayed.."

 

_ ' Don't you dare talk about him... don't you fucking dare!!!'  _

 

Out in the normal realm, the machines beeped loudly. Leo's pressure was going out of the charts.

 

"Leo-" Raph let go of Leo's hand. "NURSE! NURSE!!"

 

A middle aged woman rushed inside. Wordlessly, she grabbed a needle and added the medicine directly into Leo's veins which, eventually, helped Leo's pressure stabilize.

 

Raph sighed and sat back down. He took Leo's hand again. Once the nurse was gone he began to sob. "Leo.. p-please don't.. don't give up- w-w-we need you.."

 

_ 'Leave me alone. I need father here...' _

 

"I love you Leo.. E-Even after all the shit.. I.. I will always love you."

 

Inner Leo let himself fall down, curling up in a ball in the darkest corner of the...'room'... covering his ears. 

 

_ 'Father... father please... I can't do this, I don't want to stay!' _

 

"Leo.. Leo please.." Raph nuzzled him a little. "I don't w-wanna be without my big brother.."

 

Ted knocked at the door softly. "Raph?"

 

Raph sniffed and straightened up. "Hey.."

 

"So... I talked with the guys looking over Leo..."

 

"Yeah? What did they say?" Raph asked, not sure if he did wanna hear

 

Ted scratched his head, looking away. He didn't want to say this but it was him or the doctors... and the doctors wouldn't be able to take Raph's suckerpunch.

 

"Raph, you gotta stop talking to him"

 

"....what...?"

 

"I don't know what your dad told you but in this case, talking to him just makes things worse" Ted explained.

 

Raph pulled his hand away from Leo and placed his face in his hands. Ted tentatively walked in. Seeing no reaction from Raph, he rested a hand on his shell.  "I know you want him back, bro. But this takes time, a hell lot of time"

 

Raph didn't say anything. He just stood up and left the room. Ted followed him close behind. "Raph... Raph, c'mon man..."

 

Raph stood. He rested his hand on Ted's shoulder and offered him a small smile before turning around and continuing to walk.

 

Ted just kept following. "Raphael, talk to me"

 

Raph shook his head. If Leo was being hurt by him talking, then he wouldn't talk.

 

"C'mon bro, not the cold shoulder! Even you have to admit that is childish!"

 

Raph turned around and hugged Ted tightly. He wasn't giving him the cold shoulder. After a moment he let go and just rested his forehead against Ted's shoulder.

 

Ted hugged him back. "... you're not talking at all, huh?"

 

Raph shook his head.

 

Ted nodded. "Can I at least give you something to write down on?"

 

Raph shook his head. He moved away and left before Ted could follow. On his way to his room he grabbed a small medical kit and a mirror before heading to the cell-like-room they had been using.

 

\--

  
  


Mikey was standing in the cafeteria that had been set up. He liked this better than being waited on. "Hey! Ted!" He went over to their human friend. "How are you doing?"

 

Ted lifted his head hearing his friend's voice and smiled. "Sup, you having fun?"

 

"Yeah~ Finally relaxing in this place. What about you? Been with Raph? I haven't seen him for like.. a week."

 

Ted sighed. "He's locked himself in his room. Won't talk to anyone, broke the security cameras so... I don't know"

 

"W-what?" Mikey said, nearly dropped his tray. "Has anyone told Donnie? Cause I don't think he knows. We just thought Raph was with Leo."

 

"I told the staff to not tell him anything." Ted said. "It's best if Raph has some time for himself, another way of coping you know?"

 

Mikey nodded. "Is he eating? I remember when we were kids if he was upset, he'd punish himself but not eating."

 

"I made sure to bring him food and he always returned the tray empty"

 

Mikey frowned. "I don’t think he's eating. When he was a teenager he'd do that. And also self harmed and shit like that."

 

"... oh god."

 

Ted stood up and almost flipped the table as he left. Mikey ran after him. When they got to the door Mikey was hit by the stench. "Oh yeah, he's not been eating." He could smell the rotten food.

 

"Raph, open the door!" Ted called, mildly angry.

 

Of course, Raph didn't reply. Mikey pulled out a knife and made quick work of the lock and barreled in. Inside Raph was pressed up against the corner, his face hidden. In the opposite corner was a pile of rotten food.

 

"Holy fuck, Raphael!" Ted yelled. "This... FUCK!"

 

Mikey frowned and walked over. He knelt in front of Raph and pulled his face over. That's when they both saw that Raph had stitched his mouth shut. Ted watched the scene in horror. He took his hands to his head almost pulling his hair. For once he was speechless.

 

"Raphie.." Mikey whimpered. He turned to Ted. "We need to get the doctors in here."

 

Ted shook his head. "No... no we don't. You know what we need? A FUCKING BAT! THAT'S WHAT WE NEED! FUCK THIS, RAPH! WE'RE TRYING TO HELP YOU AND YOU DO... THIS?!??!"

 

Mikey stood up. He rested his hands on Ted's shoulders. "Breath dude. How would a bat help?"

 

"TO FUCKING SMASH HIS HEAD IN! MIGHT BE THE ONLY WAY TO GET ALL WE SAY THROUGH HIS FUCKING THICK SKULL!" Ted struggled trying to reach Raph and punch the life out of him.

 

Mikey was just as angry as Ted was. He thought about preventing Ted from hurting Raph but in cold anger he let go of Ted. "Go ahead."

 

"Thank You!" Ted walked past him and grabbed Raph by his jacket. "Listen me very well, you fucking stubborn asshole... people died for you, you hear me? They wanted YOU to have a chance at life, to keep fighting for them!"

 

Raph couldnt' reply, He just dropped his head and silently cried.

 

"OH NOW you cry~ NOW YOU FUCKING CRY!" Ted dropped him to the ground. "YOU THINK THIS IS A FUCKING CHEAP KOREAN DRAMA?!"

 

The next thing Raph felt was the force of Ted's fists. 

 

"YOU WANNA FUCKING DIE?! YOU WANNA FUCKING DIE, IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?!"

 

Mikey winced, watching Ted wail on Raph. He was sick of Raph doing shit like this every time he got upset. They finally had Donnie back, he had his arm, Leo would have his eyesight and Raph couldn't just accept it.

 

"Ted, why wasn't he with Leo?" Mikey asked calmly.

 

"Not NOW Mikey!" Ted continued with his assault, getting more tired after each blow. Raph just took the punishment "YOU... you fucking... fuck... Casey didn't die so you could do shit like this to yourself!" He cried, his voice breaking.

 

Suddenly, Raph punched Ted back in the face. "FUCKING DON’T MENTION CASEY!" He scream, his stitches tearing his lips apart as he opened his mouth to speak.

 

"THEN STOP TRYING TO FUCKING KILL YOURSELF!" Ted screamed back, getting up with difficulty.

 

"WHY SHOULDN'T I WHEN MY VOICE ALONE WAS KILLING LEO?!"

 

"I DIDN'T FUCKING SAY THAT!"

 

"What's going on in here? I'm getting reports from-" Don froze at the doorway. "Oh my god..."

 

"Mikey, keep him out of this. You get out too." Ted said.

 

Mikey stepped out of the room and put his arm around Donnie's shoulders, leading him away. "Let's go get something to eat."

 

"Are you crazy? They're going to kill each other and Raph needs medical attention!" Don replied.

 

"Donnie, it’s best we stay out of this." Mikey said, tired and his voice cold.

 

"That's your brother and your friend in there!" Don tried again.

 

"They're just working out their differences." He looked to Donnie, then felt bad. "Alright, let's break it up."

 

Mikey walked into the room and grabbed both by their coats. "HEY! THAT’S ENOUGH! Raph knows he was an idiot and you care about him, okay?!"

 

Ted breathed heavily, some of his anger still not totally released but he could work that up on the gym.

 

"Guys, I'm sorry but... I can't work with him. Not for the therapy, not for anything, alright? I'm sorry but... he's a lost cause." The human released himself from Mikey and made his way out. 

 

"You know what I thought we you saved me back then? Before those elite ninja got me? ... that's a hero, right there... that's my fucking hero- my new brother." Ted said. "But now?... I don't know what you are... or if I was even supposed to be saved..."

 

Raph covered his bloody face. He always thought that Ted would be there for him. But now Raph had pushed him too far with his need to punish himself. Mikey turned and left too, leaving the mess that was Raph for Donnie to deal with. He had had enough. 

 

Don entered the room, calm and collected. Maybe too calm and collected. He looked around, filth and blood everywhere, then looked at Raph. Raph was grossly sobbing on  the floor. He was just curled up with his head between his legs and his hands over his head

 

The genius knelt before the troubled turtle. "Raphie... look at me"

 

Raph looked up, his stitches having torn his lips. He looked pale and tear soaked.

 

"Can I ask you something? And before you say anything, think... can you do that for me?"

 

Raph nodded.

 

"... In all these years I've seen what you've done to yourself, almost drinking to death, self harming, poisoning... now this..." Don said. "It makes me wonder if you... if I should keep punishing you like this, you know? Keeping you alive. So my question is: do you want to die?"

 

"I j-just want to s-stop f-fucking up..." Raph said. "A-and I k-keep feeling... if.. if I was dead I wouldn't be hurting people.."

 

"Keep it simple, Raphael. Yes or no"

 

Raph held his head in his hands as his emotions raged inside him. The truth was he didn't know. That there was two side of him, one that wanted to die, one that didn't. But which was stronger-

 

"N-No.."

 

Don nodded. He took Raph's hand and silently got him out of that filthy room. The security team had just arrived when Raph and Don came out. 

 

"Burn everything inside" Don ordered. "And lock it tight" 

 

The soldiers complied wordlessly.

 

Raph remained silent for a little while as they walked. He then looked to Donnie. "Donnie.. if I had of s-said yes.. what would you have done?"

 

Don didn't reply. He quickened the pace, avoiding weird stares and worried maids, ignoring whoever called his name. He just had to get Raph to the infirmary soon.

 

When Raph was in the infirmary, he sat on the bed, removing his dirty jacket. He stared at the floor. Don personally took care of Raph's wounds, cleaning them and trying to repair the torn up skin. Nurses tried to offer help but it just took a deadly glare from the genius turtle to make them run away.

 

When Raph had been taken care of it smiled a little. "Thank you Donnie."

 

Don nodded. He turned to the cabinets, searching for the cream to help with the bruises.

 

"You.. you didn't answer my question.."

 

Don just waved him off then went back to look for the cream. From time to time, a subtle sniffle could be heard. Raph got up and walked over to him. He hugged him. "I'm an idoit."

 

Don squirmed and freed himself. He moved to the next set of cabinets, cursing.  "Where is it..."

 

"Donnie.." He held his hand.

 

"Don't!" Don snapped. "... just... shut up"

 

Raph squeezed his hand. "I love you.."

 

Don forced out a laugh. "No, you don't"

 

He turned, showing him his eyes full of unshed tears. "If you loved me then you would've never tried to leave me again"

 

"I j-just.. I j-just.. w-wanted Leo to get b-better.. a-and I t-thought if I s-suffered.. he w-wouldn’t.."

 

Don shook his head and went back to finding that cream. "Leo is never going to get better, Raph. He's just as messed up in the head as you are, only you have a chance"

 

It was like a stab to the heart.

 

Raph stood there in stock of Donnie's words. Before he never had anything to lose. His brother hated hated him. Now Donnie was  back and everyone had a bright new future he had everything to lose.

 

And he just lost it.

 

"Donnie.. Donnie.. I.." Raph cletched at his chest, more tears flooding down his face.

 

The genius turned and hugged Raph tightly, crying silently. "I can't and I won't lose you, Raph. Not you, never you..."

 

"I t-try s-so hard but I j-just keep f-fucking everything up-" Raph sobbed, clinging onto Donnie. "I d-don’t deserve you- y-you should h-have someone much better than me!"

 

"What I need is you to help me save you! It was late for Leo, yes, but he wasn't my first love, dammit!" Don cried.

 

Raph sniffed and wiped his eyes, then nuzzled Donnie's shoulders. "I'll.. I'll get therapy. I p-promise."

 

"I don't know how we're going to convince Ted." Don chuckled sadly. "I don't want these assholes poking into your secrets"

 

Raph shook his head. "I d-don’t want Ted to do it. But I do want to make it up to Ted."

 

Don sniffed. "Well, you know what Casey liked when he was mad at you, right? Perhaps it might work with him too"

 

"I think I know what I c-can do." He smiled a little. "He can't find any real metal wedding rings."

 

"Who says we can't?" Don smiled.

 

"Exactly." Raph stroked Donnie's cheek. "B-but he can't be my therapist. He's my best friend. He's too 'emotionally attached' ta me."

 

"Yeah I could see that" Don joked weakly. "So... one of the doctors here?"

 

Raph nodded. "Ta try anyway."

 

"Ok. I think I can find a good replacement... and Raphie, next time you pull another stunt like that, I'll personally put a bullet on your head and then I'll shoot myself. I'm not kidding"

 

Raph smiled sadly. "At least we'd go out together.."

 

"That's the point, idiot" Don smiled back.

 

"Okay, okay." Raph pulled him close. "I love you. And I really do mean it."

  
"I know, I love you too"


	22. Chapter 22

Raph got mental health treatment pretty quickly. A week later he had been diagnosed with not only severe Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, but also Chronic Depression and Manic-Depression. The Manic-Depression was attached to an odd form of Schizophrenia, meaning his suicidal and self harming tendencies were another personality that he could not control.

As such Raph was now on a lot of medication and it made him sleepy and his head numbed.

"Donnie.. c-could you help me up..?" Raph asked, waking up for the first time in nearly 24 hours.

"Sure" Don helped him with his bedsheets and pulling back the blankets for him. "How was your nap?"

Raph groaned a little. "I f-feel exhausted. And I had really fucking weird dreams again. H-how much longer do I need to be on these meds?"

"As long as the doctor says" Don replied. "After I'm done here I need to check up on Leo. He's getting his bandages removed today"

Raph nodded. "I hope he's okay.." The medication meant all the emotions that would have sparked about his voice damaging Leo's progress was numbed. "I-if he's awake t-then tell him I say hi."

"You know, I was talking with your doctor and she agreed, if you take your distance, you could go see Leo with me today"

"I'd l-like that.. but I think I need another nap-" Raph panted out of exhaustion, despite all the sleep he had gotten.

"You sure? You look like you could eat something"

"M-maybe I could eat something.." He said as his eyes slipped closed.

Don smiled and nuzzled him. "Nap first"

Raph nodded. He rolled back into bed and snuggled down. He was asleep instantly.

"And to think, he used to have insomnia." Mikey said from the doorway. "Now he's so out of it he didn't even realise I was here." Mikey sighed. "I want to hate him still.. but seeing him this pathetic- and finding out it is a form of Schizophrenia.. I just cant. Not as much as I want to." He watched Raph. "And I talked with Ted a little about it in my therapy sessions with him.. I think he's kicking himself he didn't fully spot it. But I know he's having a much harder time forgiving Raph even with the diagnosis."

Don nodded. "I don't know how I managed to forgive him right away. Tell him it's ok."

Mikey rested his hand on Donnie's shoulder. "Once we knew you weren't coming back, he became like a living dead person. It wasn't really living, just existing. He should have been dead ages ago and I think it was his love for you that kept him going."

"But when he finally got you back-" Mikey continued "-he didn't know how to cope with it. Like, having someone there to live for- he didn't realise that doing the things he used to do now had repercussions. They weren't just brushed off like before. I recon he thought he would just stay in that room, torture himself and the come out and nothing would be wrong. That's how it was when you were not around."

"I know it was my fault partially but damn..."

"Donnie, it's not your fault." Mikey said. "It was how normal his behavior was to him that was at fault. His demons that we all ignored."

Don let it slide for now. "You want to go see Leo?"

"I think it best I don't." MIkey said.

Raph rolled over in his sleep, mumbling something about being chased by a giant chicken, which made both Mikey and Donnie smile a little.

"I'd suggest taking Raph with you, even if he's asleep in a wheelchair. Also, I bet he'd like to leave that bed for a bit." Mikey said.

Don chuckled, slowly standing up. "You know I think I should try being more assertive. What I meant is WE ARE going to see Leo." Then he grabbed Mikey by the mask and almost dragged him to the infirmary.

At first Mikey struggled, but soon allowed himself to be dragged. However, when they got to the infirmary, Mikey only stood by the doorway, not daring to enter the room fully.

"Mikey, c'mon."

Mikey hesitated. Donnie was giving him that look. After a moment he gave in and entered the room fully.

Zilx was in there already assisted by a couple of utrom nurses. "Ah Donatello, Michelangelo! Good to see you, you're just in time"

"S-so.. will he be waking up today?" Mikey asked.

"Yes although there's a 25% probability that he doesn't" Zilx said checking his notes. "But you mustn't worry."

Mikey nodded, staying behind Donnie.

"Mikey, you know I would never force you to do anything you wouldn't want to do but this time I'm making an exception" Don said firmly, switching sides so Mikey was near Leo's bed.

Mikey sat down in the chair, letting out a whimper

Don put both hands on Mikey's shoulders, keeping him in place, then looked at Zlix and nodded. Zilx nodded back and began removing Leo's bandages. Mikey watched the removed the bandages. He clung onto Donnie's hand. He knew Raph should be here instead of him.

Slowly, Leo's face was revealed beneath the bandages. The area around his eyes was a bit swollen but the stitching had healed perfectly. Mikey had to look away, He couldn't face looking at Leo.

"Don't look away, Michelangelo" Don said, fingers digging into his brother's shoulders. Mikey winced a little. He turned his head towards Leo but kept his eyes closed. "You have to see him." Don insisted.

"Donatello, I don't believe this is neces-"

"Doctor Zilx, I know what I'm doing"

After some coaxing, Mikey opened his eyes and looked at Leo. He still hadn't woken up as Zilx said, didn't even flinch when the nurses cleaned up his face and stitches.

"Hmm, he should be awake by now" The doctor said.

"What do the readings say?" Don asked.

"Last night's readings showed a lot of mental activity which means he is aware of what's happening around him but I don't understand why he's refusing to come back to reality"

"Because he's a coward." Mikey said, tightening his fists.

"Michelangelo..."

"I'm sorry, Donatello, but my patient doesn't need more tension. I will have to ask you two to leave." The Utrom Doctor said.

Mikey stood. "I'm sorry Donnie. I'm n-not ready... A-and I don't want to make him worse."

Don watched with a heavy heart how Mikey literally ran from the room. As much as he wanted to stay, he knew it would be even worse if Leo woke up and saw him instead of his brothers. 

"I'll be back with Raph later" Don said before leaving.

\--

Raph groaned, opening his eyes. Someone was shaking him softly.

"Raphie..."

Raph opened his eyes. "Mmm?" He forced himself to sit up.

"Raphie, we're going to see Angel today. Get your things"

"O-okay-" Raph forced himself up, not awake enough to know who was talking to. He pulled off his dressing gown, shaking. He heard hushed voices and a bag's zippers opening, the cabinets being forced open and emptied.

"C'mon Raphie, we're getting late"

Raph grabbed his coat and a walking stick he had been using. He lent on its heavily, eyes practically closed. He felt his arm being placed around someone, it felt like a shell. 

"That's all of it, Nancy. Thanks for doing this"

"I still wouldn't advice doing this. Mr. Raphael needs to finish his treatment"

"I'm sorry but we can't stay here any longer. It was nice seeing my brother alive, that's all I needed to know."

Raph barely register what was going on. He groaned as he began to walk with his brother. "S-So tired.." He mumbled. He felt himself pressed into a wheelchair he had been bullied into having around.

"Don't worry, Raphie. We're going home"

Raph nodded, falling asleep.


	23. Chapter 23

Back in the infirmary, Zilx and the nurses were about to retire for the day when they heard a groan. "Leonardo?"

One of the Nurse went over to check. "He's waking up."

Leo struggled to open his eyes, everything was so dark as usual but gradually, some shapes began to form before his eyes.

"Easy Mr Hamato." Said the utrom nurse. "Tell me if your eyes are hurting."

Leo blinked a couple of times, feeling so out of it- almost as if he was drugged.

Zilx approached him with a penlight on his robotic hand. "Leonardo, Leonardo this is Doctor Zilx. You've been unconscious for about 3 weeks"

"We were starting to think you wouldn't wake at all." The nurse smiled.

"I'm going to turning this light on and I want you to follow it with your eyes. Think you can do that?"

Leo nodded mechanically, not understanding what was happening. Suddenly he saw a light and cringed, closing his eyes.

"Easy there. You'll be very sensitive to light for a while." The Nurse said.

Leo tried to talk, his parched lips feeling so rough when he licked them.

"Give him some water" Zilx ordered.

The Nurse did. She held it to Leo's lips and helped him drink. Leo downed the drink so quick he almost choked. "... where... am I?"

"You are in the medical bay of the Mr Bishop and Mr Donatello Hamato's base." The Nurse said

Leo rubbed his eyes, wincing at the pain. When he opened them again, he could see his hands, blurry and unfocused, but they were definitely green. He looked around, a pristine white room with machines he thought he'd never seen before; cabinets with medicines, needles, pills, and standing by his bed three utroms.

"It's alright, Leonardo. You are safe here" Zilx said. 

 

The nurse flash him a friendly smile. "Would you like something to eat?"

Leo nodded, his eyes still looking around over and over again. Zilx helped him sit up. "Leonardo, what is the last thing you remember?"

"... I... I think I... I died..."

Zilx nodded. "Well, lucky for you it didn't happen. You were saved."

A maid came over and placed a dish before Leo. One of Leo's favorites that he hadn't had in years.

"... sushi rolls?"

"Your brother said you liked them very much" Zilx said. "Normally I wouldn't advice eating seafood right after waking up from a comatose state but whatever happens we have all the equipment ready."

"Wait a second... I ... I can see?"

Zilx laughed quietly. "I was starting to think you hadn't noticed"

"... this is not a dream, is it? Or... a nightmare"

"This is reality." The Nurse said.

"Although it might not seem like it." Came a very familiar voice from the doorway.

Leo turned, his heart beating so fast he thought it was going to burst out of his chest. Donnie smiled. "Hey Leo, you gave us quite a scare."

"... who... who are you?"

"Leonardo, that's your brother Donatello" Zilx said. "Do you remember him?"

Leo shook his head. "That's not him... he's dead..."

"Look, this may be hard to believe but-"

"Where's Mikey and Raph and what's this place?! I demand to see my brothers and get that damn impostor out of my sight!"

Donnie frowned. He suspected Leo would act this way. "Nurse, can you help me get Mikey and Raph?"

"But.. but one of the other nurses said they helped Mr Hamato pack and take his brother out-"

"WHAT?!"

Leo tried to leave the bed only to be stopped by Zilx. "Leonardo, calm down."

"What did you do to them?!" Leo yelled. "Where are they!?"

"I don't know but I shall be having WORDS with the nurses!" Donnie turned. "Leo, I am real and not an imposter, but right now I have to find Mikey and Raph. Raph is in no condition to leave his bed, let alone go out of the base."

Leo pushed Zilx away taking advantage he was distracted and jumped off the bed. He immediately regretted doing that for the world around him started spinning. "Oh god..." He mumbled and fell on his knees.

The nurses helped Leo to stand up while Zilx prepared a sedative.

Don's communicator buzzed. "...natello. Donatello, can you hear me? This is Bishop. Donatello, answer me!"

Donatello picked up his communicator. "Donatello here."

"My guards just came to me without their weapons and clothes, claiming your brother Michelangelo had been responsible. Can you explain to me why before I have the rest of your family kicked out of here?!"

"Bishop..." Leo raised his head, looking at the communicator. "Bishop... is alive...?"

"Hold him still" Zilx ordered. 

Leo pushed the utrom nurses effortlessly and walked up to Don, pushing him against the wall.

"LEO! Get off of me!" He struggled. He pulled his radio closer to reply, fighting off the weakened Leo. "Bishop, I believe Mikey has taken Raph and run away. We need to get them back as Raph is in no condition to be outside! And Leo's awake and attacking me!"

The genius could hear Bishop cursing and ordering some of his men around. "Alright but after this we're having a serious conversation."

Leo put Don on a choke hold, growling. "So you're Bishop's little project huh? Think he can trick us into serving him now?!"

"N-no- Leo- I w-was in a coma a-after nearly being k-killed by Saki's m-men." Donnie struggled and choked. "I s-saved Bishop f-from Saki-"

"Yeah, likely story. I bet your boss wants me to believe in poor innocent Donnie- well, guess what! It's not working"

"Leonardo, that is your brother!" Zilx interfered. "We can prove it to you!"

"STAY BACK OR I'LL FUCKING KILL HIM!"

"Alright, alright! We won't move, just don't do anything stupid"

The ninja looked around for his sword. "My sword... where's my sword, what did you do with it?!"

"Leo-" Donnie choked. "Please- listen- r-remember-when we were kids? Y-you rescued me w-when I almost drowned p-playing with a toy car?"

"Shut up or you're dead!"

"Nurse, give him back his things" Zilx said. The Nurse hesitated by did.

"Leo please-" Donnie was running out of air. "I'm not dead! But I will be if you choke m-me!"

Now with his coat and sword, Leo felt more like himself. He released his hold on "Don" just so he could breathe. "You'll take me to your boss this instant and you'll give me back my brothers or so help me, kid. So. Help. Me" He hissed the last bit pointing the sword against the turtle's unprotected side.

"I don't have a 'boss', but I'll take you to Bishop. And trust me, I'm just as kneen to get Mikey and Raph back as you are. Raph's on medication that makes him pretty much asleep all the time and unaware of his surroundings."

"You keep your mouth shut and walk!" Leo pushed him roughly, keeping his guard.

As both turtles made their way to Bishop's office, Donatello prayed his other brothers hadn't left the base yet or this time he'd have to put Leo down for good if he wanted to live.

\--

"W-why do I have to w-wear this.. it's itchy.." Raph whined, in a soilder uniform and helmet.

"So we can protect ourselves from enemies, Raphie" Mikey said. He reloaded his gun and walked through the ruins of the destroyed city. 

He'd heard reports of the last of the elite ninja being incarcerated or killed but one could never be too sure and with Raph incapacitated to fight, he had to be alert at all times. 

"We're almost there, Raphie. April will be waiting for us."

Raph stumbled along, now using his walking cane as the ground was too rough for the wheelchair. He looked around a little feverishly. "M-Mikey.. I d-don’t wanna be here.."

"Bro, everything is cool. The base is much nicer now thanks to Bishop" Mikey smiled at him. "Ugh that sounded weird."

They continued to walk. But Mikey was too focused on looking out for the enemy to check his brother was keeping up. When he checked, Raph was nowhere in sight.

"Raph? God fucking dammit! RAPH!" But there was no reply. "FUCK! ARE YOU FUCKING HAPPY, GOD!? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO KEEP SCREWING US?!" Mikey yelled at the air, livid, throwing his hands up. 

He ran a hand over his bald scalp. "RAPH! RAPH, PLEASE ANSWER ME!"

The orange clad turtle dialed April. "... c'mon... c'mon pick up!"

"Mikey?" April asked when she answered

"April, Raph's missing. He was with me a second ago and now he's gone. I need all units looking for him!"

"Why the fuck was he outside the base?! Donnie told me about his medicated state!" April said, Mikey could then hear her barking orders. She returned to her phone. "Where did you last see him?"

"H-he was with me, I told you! Four blocks away from your base" Mikey said, keeping on the look out. "I'm going back but I can't see him!"

"Okay, okay, I've sent out the men. I'll meet with you-" April then hung up.

After some looking, Mikey was able to find the soldier armour Raph had been wearing, but still no Raph. Mikey kept calling his brother, following the direction where he'd found that clothing; panic was starting to take over. He didn't want to loose him, he didn't want to be the last turtle standing. His throat was hurting and he felt like crying- even his new arm was beginning to bother him.

The last piece of clothing Mikey found was a sock by and open manhole and Mikey instantly knew where Raph was heading.

Mikey nervously pulled out his communicator. "April, April I think I know where he's at!"

"Where?" April asked.

"The lair"


	24. Chapter 24

Raph walked around the lair- his mind layering his memories of the lair over the rumble. He swayed, standing in the livingroom for a moment. Then he turned and headed to his old room. One in it he lay on the rotten mattress, closing his eyes.

He heard a soft meow coming from the corner of the room. A big cat looked at him curiously. "Klunk?" Raph shifted. "C-come here.."

The cat came out of the shadows, it was a tabby but it wasn't Klunk; this one had a black patch of fur on his left eye. "K-Klunk 2.." He laughed softly. He retched into his pocket and offered the cat jurkie he had kept from a meal.

The starved animal ate the treat as fast as it could. Raph stroked its head softly. "Sorry, thats all I have.." He mumbled, closing his eyes again.

The cat purred, rubbing his head against the turtle's hand. Raph smiled, slipped into sleep with the cat snuggled up to him.

\--

"Mr. Donatello, thank goodness I found you. I'm going to need- what the-!"

"Stay back" Leo hissed, still pushing Don. 

It had been like this a couple of times now. Someone saw Don walking and failed to notice the turtle with the sword behind him until he actually came out. Then he would growl or threaten them until they let him and "Don" keep walking. 

"Leo, what will it take to prove to you I'm the real Donnie?" Donnie said, never stopping moving.

Leo just poked him with his sword. "Shut up"

Donnie sighed. "April was the same. She couldn't accept me at first either. But she came around after we talked it out."

"The next time you open your filthy mouth, I'll put my sword through it!"

Donnie went silent. They were at Bishop's office. He knocked on the door. "Bishop. It's Donatello. I have Leonardo here with me."

The door opened and the guards inside freaked seeing the leader of the turtles press a sword against Don's neck.

"It’s okay." Donnie indicated for the guards to put down their guns. "I'm sure we can come to a peaceful resolutions."

"You have him well trained, Bishop. He even talks like you" Leo spat.

Bishop was sitting at his desk. "What do you want, Leonardo? To kill your brother?"

"This is NOT my brother! Donatello disappeared after abandoning us!" Leo replied. "This must be just one of your sick experiments!"

“And what if it isn't? What if that truly is your brother you are threatening to kill?" Bishop said.

"Ok, everyone just... silence... please" Don interfered. "Leo, Leo I can prove to you it's me. W-we got videos of what happened- how Bishop kept me alive and-"

"I'm not interested in your creation story, kid. I want Mikey and Raph here now!"

"We're currently working on that one. Michelangelo took Raphael of the base. I just made contact with Ms O'Neil and according to her Michelangelo just phoned her. He was on his way back to the rebel base when he lost Raphael." Bishop said.

"What were they doing here on the first place?"

"Living with Donatello." Bishop said. "Raphael was receiving therapy after a suicide attempt and he had been diagnosed with a number of mental illnesses which he was taking medication for. However, this situation we find ourselves now in is particularly troublesome because the medication makes Raphael unaware of his surroundings and very exhausted. Michelangelo had his arm replaced and also was receiving therapy but was still in the middle of diagnosis."

Leo was trying to process everything as fast as he could, keeping calm but staying alert. 

"... so... that would explain my... my eyes..."

"Yes. Mortu moved his medical staff here and with technology Donatello invent we were able to speed up the growth process for Michelangelo's arm. Mine and Mortu's medical staff have been constantly treating you since you were stabbed. Your brothers then made the decision to get your eyes fixed while you were unconscious because it would be a painful process and they didn't want you going through that."

"That... doesn't sound like something they would say" Leo replied lowering his sword.

"Believe me, they do care... I care." Don said.

"A lot has happened since you were nearly killed. Although, I will grant you that Michelangelo seemed keen on letting your suffer the treatment consciously. He could not even look at you. I believe that is why he left." Bishop said.

"... well I'll be damned... that IS something they would say"

"I believe you'd appreciate more honesty. Raphael tried to commit suicide through starvation. Or rather, he sewed his mouth shut when he was told that his voice was causing your distress. He had been sitting by you every moment he could, talking to you until then. He wanted to be the first person you saw. I assume that has some sort of connect to how you lost your eyesight- I believe he wanted to show he hadn't abandoned you." Bishop said.

Leo scoffed. "What are you now, my therapist or something?"

"No." Bishop held up a file. "But your brothers report makes for interesting reading." He offered it to Leo.

Leo took it gingerly. At first he thought about not reading it but curiosity took the best of him. Don signaled the soldiers to offer him a seat and wait outside.

The file contained whole transcripted conversations. They were too detailed, too much like his brothers words to be faked.

They talked about Raph's childhood, losing Donnie. His rape, losing his eye and his feelings about all the events that had happen. That he forgave his brother for leaving their father behind despite being against the outcome- he knew now it was the only option.

It talked of how he felt knowing his voice made his brother's condition worse and how he just wanted to be silent forever in that moment. How he admired his brother. How much he loved Donnie and was willing to share with ALL his brothers now. That he knew this Donatello was the real Donatello. Even if he turned out to be a fake- which he doubted- he'd accept him anyway. He had Donnie's memories, he felt like Donnie. He loved like Donnie. It was Donnie regardless. He'd love him regardless.

And the report ended with a long list of mental health problems but and even longer list of medications for him to take.

"Is... is there anything about Mikey?"

Bishop handed him the other report. When Leo took it, it again was definitely not faked. Though he could see Ted was the therapist this time.

Again, Mikey accepted this Donnie as the real Donnie. It then went on to explain how he believed Leo should have raped him. That he knew it was his fault and now he understood the terror Raph felt. That he now couldn't help but feel that terror when around Leo.

The subject then changed to living now. How things had gotten a lot better- minus what Raph had done. Raph's condition was mentioned and it seemed Ted was angry at Raph despite it turning out to be a lot of mental health problems.

Mikey talked about his new arm. A detailed sex session where Donnie tried to help him get over his fear of machines but it had been a little too much. And then they talked about Leo some more. Mikey saying he wanted his brother to get better but he was unsure if he could ever face him.

The report ended there, obviously showing that more therapy would happen before Mikey had been fully diagnosed with any conditions other than Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.

By the end of the report Leo was speechless and his new eyes burned with tears. This was his family right there, his brothers... his Donnie... He took deep breaths going back to his meditation techniques before facing the, now confirmed, real Donatello.

"I shall give you one more explanation Leonardo." Bishop said. "Your brother went missing because of me. Saki tried to convince me to join his side. However, you know I'd never want any harm to come to earth and due to recent experiences of that time, I realised the error of my ways. Donatello discovered me as I was being torn apart piece by piece by Saki's men. He took me to a hidden lab of mine and restored me to a new body. Just as everything was complete, a ninja that followed up stabbed Donatello through the heart." He looked to Donnie. "He should have been dead but I got him into one of my status tubes in time. I then set the nanotechnology I had- primitive compared to now-a-day and utrom technology- to keep him alive and repair his heart. It took 30 years before he was strong enough to be able to leave the status chamber. I was unable to inform you as I had to stay hidden from Saki- as with my technology he would have been able to get off planet much sooner."

"Bishop, I think this is too much information" Don said. "He just woke up"

"... Donnie..."

The genius turtle turned. "... yes?"

"... you're... you're him... you're Don..."

Donnie smiled softly. "Of course I am.. Leo.." He retched out and took Leo's hand.

The ex-leader recoiled from Don's touch as if his hands were made of fire. It felt too real... too warm...

onnie just smiled, but a little less. "Take your time Leo."

It was then the communication device Bishop had beeped. He answered it. "Yes, Ms O'Neil?"

"Jones, it's Jones! Goddammit Bishop!"

"I do apologize, Mrs Jones. Now, what is it? Has Michelangelo located Raphael yet?"

"April?" Leo looked at the communicator as if it was his human friend. "Where is she?"

"She insisted on being with her rebels back at her base. However we did make improvements to it. Once you are okayed by the doctors you may move back there if you wish. However, Donatello is based here and Raphael needs to finish his treatment."

"I haven't decided that yet. Me and my brothers need to talk about that as a family" Don said. 

"Hey are you still there? Why did you call me for?" April asked.

Bishop returned his attention to the device. "I asked if Michelangelo had located Raphael yet."

"Yeah, he's in the lair. I have no idea how are they going to find that place, Shredder destroyed the tunnels when he found it"

Bishop looked to Leo and Donnie. "Would you two be able to find your way there? I know both of you know multiple ways there."

Leo nodded. "There's still one tunnel Shredder couldn't find and the one I believe Raph used"

"Although I do not believe it is wise for you to leave the base, it is an emergency. My men will drop you off as close as we can and then I suggest you go as just the two of you. I fear a large extraction team might make Raphael panic."

"Alright, just let me grab something real quick before we leave" Don said leaving the office.


	25. Chapter 25

Raph was woken by soft paws on his face. He groaned, sitting up to see a little kitty wanting food. "You that hungry huh?"

Klunk 2 meowed and licked at his eye patch.

"Alright, alright." Raph sat up. "Geez, you'd think Mikey would feed ya more." He pushed himself off of the rotten mattress. He picked up the small cat and carried him down into the kitchen.

Raph didn't seem to notice it was mostly destroyed as he searched for food. "Wow, no one's gone to get groceries. I guess this spam will have to do. It's in date." He opened the tin and emptied it onto the broken plate he didn't notice was broken. He put it on the floor. "Here you go Klunk."

The cat smelled at it, surprisingly enough the spam was good and so he ate it.

Raph gave him a couple of stroke before setting about making breakfast. The hallucination he was having was becoming so bad he didn't know he was just holding a pan handle over a destroyed cooker, cracking imaginary eggs. Klunk 2 licked his whiskers happily and full. He jumped on the counter seeing Raph do weird moves with his hands.

Raph retched over and stroked Klunk 2. "You know you should be on the counter." Klunk 2 meowed and flopped on it definitely. "Awww~ No one can stay mad at you. Just don't tell Mikey I admitted that." Raph rubbed Klunk 2's chin. Klunk 2 purred and continued to look at him and all the weird stuff he did. Then his ears perked up. 

Tired and on the verge of tears, Mikey appeared. He sighed in relief when he finally found his brother.

Raph looked. "Hey sleepy head! How did yah sleep? Hungry? I'm making breakfast!"

"Raphie, why did you run off! I've been sick worried!" Mikey said, coming inside the destroyed kitchen.

"Run off? What are you talking about?" Raph frowned. He then pressed a half broken place into Mikey's hand. "Here, have some breakfast you weirdo."

"Breakfast?" Mikey looked down at his plate. It had mostly dirt. "Oh... your pills..."

Raph shook his head. He then began to dish up the rest of the dirt and place them on the ruined table. "I wonder whats taking the others so long.. maybe they did a little too much drinking last night, right Klunk?"

Mikey was surprised when there was a meow in response. Klunk 2 jumped off the counter and rubbed himself on Mikey's leg. The orange clad ninja almost dropped the dish. 

"Oh my... you look just like him..."

Raph's eye twitched. "Don't forget it's your turn to do the dishes Mikey."

Mikey simply nodded, too in awe after seeing Raph's new friend. "I didn't even know there were still cats around!" Klunk 2 meowed and jumped on the table.

"We've run out of cat food, but I think there was another can of spam. Could you check for me, Mikey?"

"S-sure sure! Oh dude, this little guy is so thin" Mikey said petting the cat. Mikey was soon able to find another can of spam. Infact, there was a whole bunch of old tins that were still in date. "You must be the luckiest cat in the world, Klunk 2!"

As Klunk 2 ate, Mikey made an amazing discovery. Klunk 2 was a girl. "Aww, you're a cute lady huh?" Klunk 2 meowed happily. The perked up her ears. Someone else was coming.

Mikey stood up, gun in hand. "Raphie, you stay calm ok? Imma see who's at the door"

"Okay. It's probably April or Casey. I'll make more breakfast." Raph said happily.

Mikey nodded and turned his attention on the entrance, pointing his gun at it. "Who is it?!"

"Mikey, its just us." Donnie said, stepped into the lair. He looked around, seeing the destruction. "Oh geez..." He voice wavered with emotion.

Mikey was about to put the gun down when he spotted Leo.

"... L-Leo?"

The ex-leader locked his gaze with Mikey's, the baby blue he loved so much still so beautiful, so perfect. "Mikey..."

"Hey Sleepy heads! Your in time for breakfast!" Raph called.

Donnie looked to Mikey. "Breakfust?"

Mikey shook his head, then looked at Don. "H-his meds, he needs his meds. I have them here." He said, pulling some pills from his pocket.

"Oh god, he's hallucinating isn't he." Donnie took them from Mikey and began the hard task of trying to convince Raph to take them.

Meanwhile, Leo studied the conditions of the lair. This was one of the last things he saw with his old eyes- the destruction of his home.

"I miss living here." Mikey said quietly to Leo.

"... yeah... sure it... it was too cold during winter but... it was home"

"Leo.. I... I understand why you tried to rape me. I.. I s-should of told you about Raph.."

Leo held up his hand. "No, it was wrong. I should've never even thought about something so stupid like... like rape..."

"No! Leo! I deserved it! I am a little whore-slut, like you said!"

"Mikey, stop. Please don't do that to yourself" Leo approached him.

Mikey wince as Leo stepped closer. He screwed his eyes shut.

Leo stopped. "... Mikey... Mikey, I'm sorry. I know what I did is unforgivable but... please...please don't fear me"

Mikey hugged himself, tears flooding down his face against his will. No, he couldn't lose control. He wouldn't let his emotion out. He began to take deep breaths, hyperventilating to make the tears dry up.

"You have to let it out, Mike" Leo said taking another step closer. "You have to or it'll kill you"

"I c-cant- I can't let it out!" Mikey cried out, pressing his palms to his temples.

Tiny whimpers and a rush of orange caught Leo's attention. "... is that a cat?"

Mikey looked down. "Y-yeah.. s-she looks so much like Klunk.." He sank to his knees, stroking the kitty to calm down.

Klunk 2 didn't stay for the petting though, she had to go some place else. Leo followed her and motioned Mikey to do the same. Mikey did, leaving Donnie with Raph. He had a feeling Donnie and Raph needed to be alone anyway. They followed her. "I wonder where she's going.."

Leo saw her disappearing inside Splinter's room or what was left of it.

"... should we...?"

"Yes." Mikey stepped inside carefully.

Leo took some time before following. The place had been burnt down but there were some things that could be saved. Klunk 2 was resting on what once was Splinter's favorite robe.

Mikey knelt down by Klunk 2. "Hey.. are you only kitty?" He stroked her head softly.

A tiny meow came from under the cat. Leo knelt by the robe too, smiling softly when a tiny kitten head appeared.

"I can't believe it..."

"She's giving birth!" Mikey said excitedly. He watched with amazement as the little cat panted, pushing out small kittens.

"Why would she want us here though? Cats in labor usually hide."

"Maybe she's been alone too long..." Mikey said.

"C'mon girl, you're almost there" Leo encouraged her softly.

Klunk 2 gave birth to 6 kittens. She lay there panting heavily. Mikey stroked her as she cleaned up the little kitten with her tongue. All the kittens looked healthy despite the mother's irregular feeding schedule. Leo felt himself tearing up a bit. “This is truly a miracle..."

Mikey sniffed. "A-and.. and there's no way we're leaving them h-here-" That's what it took. Mikey began to sob heavily, letting out what was caught up inside. Hope always made him cry more than sadness and it was something he couldn't suppress.

Leo took this chance to get closer to Mikey and rest a hand on his shell. Mike pressed against Leo, grabbing his coat and sobbing into it.

"That's it... let it all out" Leo said soothingly.

Mikey did. Sobbing on his brother's shoulder as if nothing had ever happened between them.

\--

"What do you want for breakfast?" Raph asked, opening the broken fridge.

Donnie was finding it hard to get Raph to take his medication.

"You know I don't eat breakfast, Raphie. Just coffee will do." Don played along. "Now can you please try this new candy?"

Raph frown, going to where Donnie's coffee pot used to be. "Wouldn't it be better to ask Mikey?"

"H-he already tried some but he didn't like them a-and it kinda made me feel bad 'cause I ... I made them!"

Raph turned and looked at Donnie. He sighed. "I can never say no to that face.." He took the pills from Donnie and down them. "Bleh! Man, no offence Donnie but that's the worst candy I've ever taken."

Don smiled. "That's ok. I'm just glad you took them for me~"

"I- ah.. my head.." Raph said, pressed his face into his hand. "W-what was in that candy..?"

"Nice stuff, now come sit down" Don helped him to the table.

Raph didn't move. He looked at his hands. For him, it was like a light switch being flicked on and off at a fast rate. Between the hallucination and reality. "Donnie.. what did you do? I d-dont like this."

"Shh, it's ok" Don patted him on the shell.

Raph looked around as he return to reality. He pressed his face against Donnie's shoulder and sobbed.

"I'm sorry... I just couldn't keep you like that. It wouldn't be fair"

"I know.. I k-know.." Raph sobbed. "B-but I didn't want it to end.."

Don took his hand. "It doesn't have to end. We can make it even better"

Raph smiled a little. He sniffed. "OKay..." He looked around "Were Mikey and Leo really here?"

"I don't know, why don't you ask them yourself?" Don smiled seeing Leo and Mikey come out.

Mikey was carrying a box. So was Leo but Leo's was obviously full of salvage stuff. Mikey's box was meowing.

"Guys!" Mikey walked over. "That cat Raph found had babies!"

"Wait, there's cats?" Don asked.

Mikey showed Don the box with Klunk 2 and all the little Klunkittys. Klunk 2 meowed and licked at her babies.

Don laughed. "Unbelievable!"

"She likes that robe, so... I think that's her new bed" Leo said.

"Wait, I didn't hallucinate the cat?" Raph said, looking in. He smiled. "Master Splinter would have loved his robe being used to bring new life into the world.."

Leo looked up from the box to Raph. "Hey..."

Raph focused on Leo, his mind catching up with current events. "Wait, your eyes? It worked?"

Leo offered him a small smile. "It worked"

Raph smiled back, but then it faded. "Look, Leo- about-..." He yawned, his emotional distress at remembering everything between him and Leo cause his medication to react- making him sleepy.

"Is he alright?" Leo asked worriedly.

Don nodded. "We have to keep his emotions at bay until the treatment is complete. Then he won't need the pills anymore and he'll be able to talk to you and everyone without wanting to hurt himself"

Raph swayed a little. He rested his head on Donnie's shoulder.

Mikey sighed. "We need to get him back before he falls asleep. And these kittens need real food."

"I think it'll be best if I take you to April's base. Bishop is pretty mad at you right now, Mike" Don said.

Mikey looked at the ground sheepishly. "O-okay- lets get moving."


	26. Chapter 26

Mikey was very lucky he had kittens with him. He was able to use them to divert everyone's anger at him for running off and taking Raph with him.

Donnie of course was swamped by people, which left Leo to take care of the sleepy Raph. Leo wasn't sure what to do but check the modifications done to April's base. Bishop had truly helped the rebel leader and the place looked less like a dump and more like a professional center of operations. Raph hobbled along side Leo. He had been too stubborn to sleep but did take the walking stick back.

"This place looks nice. Doesn't it?"

"Yeah, it does." Raph smiled. "T-This is the first time I've seen it like this."

"Kinda makes me glad I was blind all that time. Didn't get to see it all... destroyed and.. yeah..."

"Leo.. how.. how is it? Having your eyesight back? Do we look much different?" Raph asked, trying to keep his emotions in check so he didn't get sleepy.

"You definitely look old" Leo chuckled.

"Dude, we're in our late 40s, of course we're old." Raph snorted.

"... I can't believe Don's alive"

Raph swallowed. "I.. I know." He smiled a little. "I fainted when I saw him."

"So I've heard" Leo said. "... I tried to... to kill him"

"I'm not surprised." Raph said. "You tried to kill the nurses and doctors and me too. But you were REALLY out of it."

Leo took them to a couch and helped his brother sit first. "So Bishop is really a good guy?"

"T-Thanks," Raph said as he sat down. "And yeah- but he still creeps me out."

"Don seems like trust him." Leo pointed out. "Kinda makes one feel jealous"

Raph chuckled. "Don't. I already got the evil eye from suggesting Bishop had a thing for Donnie."

Leo smiled. "... it's been a while since I heard you laugh"

"There wasn't much to laugh about.." Raph said. His eyelids drooped and he yawned.

"Better take you to bed, you look exhausted"

"I f-feel exhusted.." Raph said. "Sorry.." He focused on Leo's face. "Leo.. I.. I forgive you for.. l-leaving Master S-Splinter behind.."

"It's ok. We'll talk about it later" Leo shushed him up. "Let's find you a nice room."

With Leo's help, and resting on his walking stick, Raph stood up. He leaned on the stick heavily as he felt himself grow dizzy. Raph grabbed Leo's hand. "Leo- I'm sorry-" a tear rolled down his cheek. "I n-never m-ment to abandon you.. I k-know it was my fault that you.. your eyes."

"Shhhh, later Raphie" Leo whispered, the old nickname very familiar on his and Raph's ears.

Raph smiled a little at that. "I n-need to sleep."

"We're almost there, you'll have a nice comfy bed just for you."

Raph smiled. "Everything seems like a luxury now.."

"One we can actually afford apparently" Leo helped Raph lay on the bed. "There, better?"

"Much.." Raph smiled softly at Leo. He hesitated. "Leo.. can you.. nap with me for a while? Like we used to do as kids?"

"Sure but I doubt I'll be sleeping. I have a lot of stuff to see now I got these" Leo chuckled pointing at his eyes.

Raph chuckled. "I don't blame you." He shifted of so Leo could slip into the double bed. "So you're not mad we had them done while you were asleep?"

"I would've loved to feel some more pain. Have a reputation to keep, you know?"

Raph chuckled. "At least you won't have to wear those stupid glasses anymore."

"They made me feel cool" Leo said, pretending to be offended.

Raph smiled. He closed his eyes. "They w-want me to get a new eye.." He mumbled.

Leo hummed. "Do you want it?"

"Dunno.. part of me thinks I don't deserve it." Raph mumbled more. "But then that could be my self harming personality talkin'"

"Could be. But it's ok, it's your decision. I think you're ok with or without it"

"One eye makes me a better shot.. but it does cause me to walk inta things.." Raph said, obviously clinging on to consciousness.

"I remember how that felt the first two days. Bumping into everything and everyone... wasn't fun"

"Mmm.." Raph was able to say before he was dead asleep.

Leo couldn't close his eyes even if he wanted to. Everything was so new for him and it couldn't go unexplored. Once he was completely sure Raph wouldn't wake up, he left the bed and roamed around the base. He soon found Mikey sitting with Angel. They were both fussing over the kittens and mamma cat.

She was just as he'd imagined her; beautiful, strong, no longer purple haired due to the extinction of beauty products but it didn't make her less special. Her skin had darkened a bit and she had some visible scars but it was her smile what captivated him, hope and happiness oozing from her eyes.

Angel's eyes drifted upwards. They connected with Leo's. "LEO!" Angel jumped up and hugged him tightly. "Leo... oh god Leo.."

"Hey sis. You look beautiful" Leo smiled and hugged her. Angel wasn't able to say anything. She just happily cried on his shoulder. "C'mon now, I know I don't look like a superstar but that's why you have Ted around" Leo joked.

Angel pulled back and stroked his face. "Oh Leo- I love you so much. You have no idea how happy I am to see your spark again."

Leo chuckled and shook his head. "I'm nowhere near there, Angel. But I will be."

"Trust me, there's already such a difference." Angel couldn't stop looking him in the eyes.

"If you say so. Mikey showed you the kittens?"

"Yes! I've already dibbed one." Angel said. "The little black one."

"That's good. I hope Ted doesn't mind"

"Oh, he loves cats." Angel smiled. She turned to Mikey. "So.. are you going to stay here? Or go back? Ted needs to know."

"Don says I have to apologize to Bishop and return the uniforms if I ever want to go back" Mikey said.

"Do you?" Angel asked. "I know they have to take Raph back."

"Well he's definitely going back. Has to stay there till he's cured. Me? I don't know, I kinda wanna go back but this is my place."

"Donatello said you needed treatment too. We all do" Leo added.

"I think it would be best if we all went to Bishop's base. I wanna stay with Ted, and I know Ted wants to keep an eye on Raph even if he's not happy with him right now."

"I haven't heard all the details but was the fight that bad?" Leo asked.

"Mikey would know, he was there." ANgel said

Mikey sighed. "It's something I really don't want to remember. I'll just say it WAS pretty bad"

"I.. I just wanna know something-" Ange asked. "Had he really sewn his mouth shut?"

Mikey just nodded. Angel sat back on the sofa and stroked Klunk 2 silently. The room was too silent for Leo's liking; it's not like he wasn't used to it by now, in fact he preferred it that way but not now. 

"Mikey, can we talk? In private?"

"Sure.." Mikey stood, following Leo. "What is it?"

"I wanted to apologize for that night and... and all the times I made you feel like shit." Leo started. "You didn't deserve to be used, little brother, and I want you know no one, not even me, will use you again."

Mikey looked at the floor, hugging himself. "I d-don’t deserve your apology.."

Leo sighed. "Yes you do. You deserve this, you deserve to be happy! That's why I... I want our relationship to stay strictly brotherly"

Mikey hugged himself tighter. "Donnie w-wanted you to join us.." He looked at Leo. "After everything that's happened I don't think I can go back to being just your brother. A-and although we're.. r-rocky right now.. I don't want us to be just brothers."

"Perhaps but until we receive our therapy and figure out what to do with our lives now, I believe it's for the best"

"Alright.. but once we've been through therapy then I want you to reconsider."

Leo nodded. "I will, I promise. Uhmm... how... how are you feeling?"

"Honestly? I feel better." Mikey smiled a little. "I forgotten what it was like to have a cat. Animals always helped me to calm down."

"You think she likes the name Klunk though? Oh and did you name all the kittens yet?"

"I was thinking of calling her Klunket. Since 'Klunk 2' is a bit of a mouthful. And no, the kittens aren't named at all." Mikey admitted.

"Well, I could help you... if you want"

"When they open their eyes and walk on their own, then we'll name them." Mikey said with a small smile.

"... you know... of all things I missed while I was blind, the one thing I missed the most was your smile"

Mikey blushed, rubbing his neck and smiling almost against his will. "R-Really?"

Leo smiled and nodded. "I hope one day I get to see another one of those that made any room so bright..."

MIkey gave Leo's hand a small squeeze. "I hope so too.."

A group of kids called for Leonardo excitedly and he chuckled. "I'm needed elsewhere"

Mikey nodded. "Go do you dubty!" He waved him off as returned to the kittens.

\--

When Raph opened his eyes it wasn't Leo he saw, but Donnie. "H-hey.." He took in a sleepy breath.

"Hi handsome" Don smiled. "You sleep well?"

"Yeah~" Raph leaned up and kissed Donnie sweetly.

A chorus of kittens caught Raph's attention and Don giggled. "Oh that. Well, a friend of yours says pets help with therapy sometimes and since we have a bunch of them-"

Raph sat up to see that the cat they rescued and the kittens have been moved into his room. He smiled. "They're so adorable~"

"The mother seems to like you even more than Mikey which is a shocker." Don commented.

"I think cause I fed her first." Raph smiled as the Mamma cat came over to be stroked. "Has Mikey named her?"

"Klunket I think, said Klunk 2 was too long and sounded like a bad movie."

Raph chuckled. He stroked the cat's chin. "Hi Klunket." Klunket purred and closed her green eyes real tight, she was really enjoying all the pampering.

"Angel already adopted the black one so when they don't need their mom anymore, she'll take it" Don said.

"That's fine." Raph smiled. "We need to find a male kitty so she can have more babies."

"We're sending a team to find more stray animals. If this cat could survive than there's gotta be more"

"Other than all the rats." Raph said. He looked up at Donnie and smiled. "I feel happy.."

“Happy-happy or med induced happy?" Don asked.

"A little of both." Raph retched up and stroked Don's cheek. "Mostly happy-happy

Don grabbed Raph's hand and pressed it on his chest. "Me too... I'm so happy I could explode"

Raph grinned. He forced himself to sit up completely and kissed Donnie softly.

"Ehem... sorry for interrupting-" 

Don pulled away hearing Leo's voice. "Oh... h-hey"

"Hey Leo, ya doing okay? Eyes still good?" Raph asked.

Leo nodded. "What about you?"

"I just woke up again." Raph rubbed his face. "A little sleepy but feeling happy." He smiled.

"That's good. Just wanted to check on you... gotta go now" Leo waved good bye and left.

"... he's... he's ignoring me, isn't he?"

"I think he's still in shock." Raph said. His smile faded and he yawned.

"How long till he realizes I'm me?" Don sighed. "I mean, I don't want him to ever forgive me if that makes him happy but it hurts to be ignored"

"I think he knows you are you now.. but was embarrassed he tried to kill you. He's probably thinking he doesn't deserve to be around you right now-" Raph ested back on his pillow.

Don rolled his eyes, he was tired of hearing that. "Why's that everyone thinks they don't deserve anything!"

"Because everything became a luxury"

"Things are different now! Not everything has to be a luxury!" Don stood up walking to the nearest window to look outside.

Raph forced himself to stand and walked over. He rubbed Donnie's shell. "I know.. but it's gonna take a little while for everyone to get used to that fact."

"Yeah... I always forget that"

Raph kissed Donnie's shoulder. "The Utroms are doing a good job with cleaning up. It already looks a lot better out there.."

Don smiled a little. In effect right now utroms and triceraton units were cleaning up the streets, making the city more decent. Humans had been very acceptant this time, then again these were desperate times. If the Devil himself came to offer them help people would welcome him with red carpets and a bunch of virgins.

The genius chuckled at the ridiculous mental image.

Raph nuzzled him softly. "I love you, Donnie."

Don rested his head back, sighing contently. "I love you too, Raphie."


	27. Chapter 27

"Raphie, are you sure you want to do this? I told you I could get them easily, just need to talk to-"

"Nope." Raph said, leaning on his walking stick. It had been two weeks and he was much better but, the wedding was being planned and Raph had been unable to make it up to Ted. "I have to be the one to do this."

"At least let me go with you" Don insisted. "Something bad could happen and, not that I don't trust your survivor skills but-"

"Donnie, you know your day is full." Raph said, resting his hand on his shoulder. "I'll be okay."

Don sighed in defeat. "Alright but at least take someone with you, please?"

"Eeehhhhhhhhhhhhh-" Raph then saw the look on Donnie's face, "Okay. Who though?"

"I don't know! Mikey is finishing therapy with Ted but-"

Raph leaned over and kissed Donnie's temple. "I'll be back before you know it."

"Raph! Raph, you get back here until I find someone to go with you!"

From the corner of his eye, Don caught a glimpse of a black large coat following Raph. 

"Leo..." 

Silently he thanked him for keeping an eye on his brother but the little sliver in his heart seemed to bury itself deeper with the ex-leader's constant avoidance.

\--

It took Raph a while to realise Leo was following him. He pretty much jumped out of skin when his older brother called him name.

"And here I thought you'd be slower with that cane" Leo grinned.

Raph held it out. "Don't scare me like that!"

"You, scared? Wow, you're losing your touch Raph"

"I’m still on my treatment, ya know." He turned and continued to walk down the streets

Leo followed him, silently this time.

"W-when we were all separated I found a lot of jewellery. I hid it away because I didn't want them sold for weapons. Now.. if I only could remember where I put it.."

"Don't they have metal detectors on Bishop's base?"

"Probably..." He rubbed his chin. "Man, this would be easier if my head wasn't so messed up."

"Was there a signal or building near by where you hid them?" Leo asked.

"Hmmmmm..." He rubbed his next. "OH! It was in a subway service room."

Leo scanned the area. "I don't think there's even a subway entrance here. Maybe we need to keep walking"

Raph nodded. He continued to walk, feeling a little dizzy. But he was determined to moving. "Lets keep going on then."

Leo quickened his pace, catching up to Raph. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay." Raph said, stubbornly. He looked to Leo. "And you?"

"Can't complain, I can see better now" Leo said. "Therapy is going great too"

"I was really against therapy at first.. but they forced me after I stitched my mouth shut. I'm glad they did." Raph said

"What made you think that was a good idea though?"

"Because my voice was killing you.." Raph said.

Leo hummed. "To be honest, I don't remember hearing you. I don't remember anything that happened while I was unconscious"

Raph spotted a subway. "This way."

"Careful, there's rocks and glass"

Raph worked his way over the ground. He moved down the subway. He looked around, trying to remember. It wasn't that easy for Leo to go down, almost slipping a couple of times and landing bad on his feet. "Shit, I think I cut myself"

Raph turned around and went over to him. He checked him over. He pulled out a bandage and wrapped the cut. "How are you more clumsy with eyes?"

"Excuse me and my eyes for being extra curious" Leo chuckled.

"C'mon, I've remember where it is." He and Leo slowly made their way to a service room.

Inside was a fake wall panel that Raph removed. Inside was a small treasure trove

"Wow. You looted all of this?"

"Better than it being used for bad." Raph began to search through the hord. "AH!" He pulled out two platinum rings and one diamond engagement ring. "Think this will do?"

Leo took the rings and inspected them closer. "Hmm... well I gotta say, the detail work is great and it's amazing it survived the environment."

"Well, I rescued them not that long after everything started." He took them and polished them on his jacket. He then smiled. "If there's anything you want, you can have it."

"Seriously Raph, what could I possibly do with jewelry?" Leo laughed quietly. "Although maybe there's something nice in here that goes with my eyes~?"

Raph sniggered. "Okay, okay. Although we have all the girls covered for their birthdays." He replaced the fake wall.

"Hey, you think Mike would've liked the turtle brooch?" Leo asked. "It was pretty cute and tiny, elegant I must say"

"It is. Maybe Donnie would like it better." He looked Leo. "Why have you been avoiding him?"

"I haven't been avoiding him. What are you talking about?" Leo asked casually.

"He thinks you are. He keeps trying to talk to you and you walk off." Raph said.

Leo kicked a pebble as he walked. "Oh... well, there's not much to tell so... why bother"

"Leo, he wants to be your brother again."

"Look, let's just go back. I don't want to stay here any longer." The ex leader made sure the path was clean and free of glass so Raph wouldn't get injured.

Raph way walking out of subway he stopped. He looked at his hand. "Leo... I think I forgot to take the medication.."

Leo looked back. "Oh crap, that's not good."

Raph swayed a little. He covered his eyes. "Leo.. we need to get out. I'm starting to hallucinate."

Without wasting any second, Leo helped Raph to climb on his back; the extra weight on his shell wasn't tolerable due to his shell still on recovery process. 

"Hang on, Raph. Just tell me about your day or something, don't let your mind slip"

"Did we train..? I can't remember.." Raph mumbled. He looked around at the subway, unsure of what he was seeing.

"No, we didn't. We were looking for rings for Angel" Leo reminded him knowing it would be useless. 

He found a safe exit and helped Raph get out first, then he followed him and threw him on his back again, grunting because of the pain. 

"Raph, c'mon you're better than this. You don't need those stupid pills to keep you lucid!"

Raph slipped off of Leo's shell. "You're hurting.." He cupped his brother's cheeks.

"W-well yeah a bit but we need to get back to the base fast"

Raph took a couple of breaths. He held out his hand. "J-just guide me. I d-don’t want you carrying me if it hurts you.." He looked around. "Where are we?"

"Lean on me" Leo put Raph's arm around him. "We're not far from the base, just 6 blocks away"

Raph did as he was told, using his walking stick. "Leo.. I see a bamboo forest.."

Leo thought. "What else do you see?"

"Y-you're wearing a Yukata- dark blue.." Raph mumbled. "A-and lanterns.. they're hanging from the bamboo.."

"That's a nice scenario, yes" Leo kept walking. "Is there someone else with me?"

Raph shook his head. "Just me and you.." He sighed. "I know it's not real.. but I wish you could see it."

"Being blind for so long once gets pretty good at picturing stuff he can't see" Leo smiled. "And I see it, Raph"

Raph opened his mouth to say something when they heard the sound of a little girl crying. Raph moved away from Leo, looking around.

"Raph, no. You know that's not real." Leo said grabbing Raph's hand.

"But... it sounds like Shadow-"

It sounded nothing like Shadow. Leo's sensitive hearing could detect the metallic undertone of the crying. It was a robotic-trap disguised as a little girl.

Leo pulled Raph's arm hard almost dragging him all the way back. "Don't listen to it. It's that fucking robot trap again!"

Raph fought against him weakly, but soon they found the robot. It was stuck, trapped under rubble without a chance of being freed.

"I.. I have to help her! This time I could save her!" Raph struggled.

"Raph, you're going to make me hit you and this time I swear you'll be left with more than just a headache!" Leo threatened.

Raph stopped struggling. "B-but... I c-couldn’t stop her.. I c-couldn’t.. I c-couldn’t save anyone!"

Leo turned his brother so they faced each other. "Look, she was my responsibility too and I did nothing. If there's someone to blame here, blame me"

"B-but I didn't help you either!" Raph said, clinging onto Leo's wrists. "I left you to die and go blind!"

"That's in the past now. Have you learnt nothing from those sessions? I understand what happened now, it wasn't your fault"

Raph rested his forehead on Leo's shoulder. "Do.. do you really forgive me?"

Leo nodded, pulling Raph closer. "I should've forgiven you a long time ago. In fact, there's really nothing to forgive! I was just... I don't know what happened to me. I should've been your leader, your brother... I should've been there for you like always"

"Leo.." Raph cupped Leo's cheeks, looking into his eyes. The rest of the world was warped with hallucinations for Raph, but Leo was real. Leo was there. He leaned forwards and kissed Leo softly.

The tender gesture felt so new, strange even but compared to the myriad of meaningless kisses he'd had during the years, this kiss was real. For a moment Leo didn't know what to do, like the first time he was kissed back in his teenage years and, just like back then, Raph was his guide and he became the follower.

Raph broke the kiss slowly. He pressed his forehead again Leo's. "T-take me home. I need my medication. After that.. I w-want to be with you."

And so Leo and Raph walked back to the base hand by hand, all differences finally left behind along side the pitiful simulated cries of the fake girl in distress.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not fully back as I wanted but I'm cleaning my files and turns out this RP based story is almost over and... I just wanna get this over with, guys. This has been the longest writer's block ever and with me joining a new fandom yet not having any inspiration for said fandom either it's driving me insane. So I'll be posting the rest of the RP, excuse the crappy dialogue or plotholes you might find; we were kinda not really into it by the end. But eh, a story is a story I guess.

 

 

 

Getting to the base was a lot harder with Raph trying to turn back every chance he had, his hallucinations only getting worse by the second but finally, after what ir felt like an eternity, they arrived at tht base. As soon as Raph was laid to rest on the bed, the former leader grabbed his brother's medication and made sure he actually took it before he could finally relax by his side. 

Like it always happened after the pill made effect, Raphael was back to his former self almost immediately only this time, he reached for his brother's hand and gave him a grateful smile. "Just in time. Thanks bro. I feel like I should reward ya somehow"

 At the suggestive tone, Leo looked away not wanting to give his brother false hopes. "Raph, are you sure about this? A lot happened between us and I don't want us to regret this"

 "We don't have full on sex tonight, that's okay. I just wanna be with someone I trust. Someone I know I love and loves me back" Raph replied, brushing Leo's cheek with his thumb. 

"Funny, the way we've been acting lately one would say we have a twisted definition of love"

 Raph deadpanned for a moment before grabbing his brother by his coat, pulling him down and over his own body. "Would you just shut up and kiss me already?"  
  
Chuckling, Leo brushed his brother's lips in a quick kiss. "Now _that's_ the Raphael we know and love"

"Shut up you dork and you call that a kiss? _This_ is a real kiss" With that said, Raph captured Leo's lips in a more forceful and passionate kiss that had them both clinging to each other as if to make sure they weren't dreaming, to be certain the other was still there, real... alive. 

They parted from each other when air became scarce but their hands were pretty much still over each other's bodies, having messed their clothing in the rush of the moment. With Raph's upper half now exposed, Leo couldn't help but take a good look at his brother's scars; his body was covered in them, some from their enemies but most of them he remember were from his own katana and the thought alone made his heart ache. 

Leaning over again, Leo buried his nose on Raph's neck, finding a jagged scar which he kissed apologetically making his brother shiver at the contact. "Guess you can see all my scars now, huh Fearless?"

"I never liked seeing them. Reminded me of my mistakes, how I failed to protect you" Leo replied bitterly, his finger tracing the myriad of cracks and chips on Raph's plastron. The latter shivered as Leo kept touching him, the caresses going lower and lower until, at last, Leo reached the slit that housed Raph's penis.

The soft strokes were causing Raph to become super sensitive, the quickly engorded shaft dropping into Leo's waiting hand. With Raph's shaft exposed, Leo wrapped his hand around it and gave it long, slow strokes. Raph groaned, feeling Leo's rough hand which only moved faster, going from base to head, switching its pace every now and then to make it less predictable. Raph churred loudly and jerked his hips, cumming over his stomach and coating Leo's hand with warm semen. 

Satisfied with the results, Leo kissed Raph softly as he came down from his orgasmic high. "Good?"

"Fuck yeah it was... thanks" Raph smiled, reaching down brushing his fingertips against Leo's hidden pocket. He was surprised however when Leo scooted away. Raph froze, sensing Leo's sadness."Leo... hey man, it's okay"

"... I was such a douchebag... Mikey didn't deserve..." Leo covered his eyes with his hands. "... god... I'm just- I know I've apologized tons of times and I'm hoping group therapy ties all loose ends but that won't ever fix what I did. He's our baby brother and I... I just... I fucked him up! I made him feel like shit!"

Raph kissed Leo's forehead. "Mikey will forgive you. We all do."  

"... will we ever be what we used to... or at least close to that?"

"I think so." Raph said, honest. "I really do. But we need to forgive ourselves and each other."

"Right... sorry I killed the mood"

Raph smiled. "It's okay Leo." He leaned over and kissed him softly.

"I see you two are doing okay." Donnie's soft voice came, poking his head in a little. Leo tensed up but relaxed when Raph's arm wrapped around his middle. "Can I... come in?"

It felt like a lifetime but Leo finally nodded, allowing the genius to enter. Donnie walked in and shut the door quietly. He sat on the bed. "Leo, why would I worry if you guys did something?"

Leo shrugged. "He's your mate so..."

"Yes.. but we both agreed we'd share." Donnie smiled. He stroked Raph's head while he slept.

"I assume Michelangelo knows of this agreement as well?"

"Of course he does. In fact, we kinda had our moment already. We both needed it" Donnie blushed. "Once we settle in a permanent base... well... have you... thought about it? Giving this whole group thing a try?" 

"Help me get him off me and we can talk elsewhere. I don't want him worrying over nothing"

"Oh, sure." Donnie helped peel Raph off. "The meds put him out for a long time."

Now free from Raph, Leo signaled Don the door with a tilt of his head. Donnie stepped outside, waiting for Leo. The eldest glanced back at Raph one last time before heading out with Don following him like a puppy. They walked till they found an empty room.

Once inside Donnie closed the door and turned to Leo. "Ok first things first... I want to know. Have you been avoiding me? Am... am I making you uncomfortable?"

"We're in the same room right now. Does that mean 'ignoring' to you?" Leo asked back.

Donnie rubbed his arm. "I... no.. I just.." He looked at Leo. "I-if you don't want me around I'll make sure I'm not in your way." When Leo didn't say anything, Don took the hint and prepared himself to leave.

"A stupid discussion with Raph followed by a random fight between our enemies and you couldn't even send a text..."

Donnie dropped his head. "I lost my phone in the attack, Leo. I know it sounds like a shit excuse but it’s what happened. I went to call for backup and one of the Foot Ninja saw it and destroyed it."

"You had tons of opportunities before you died, Donatello" Leo countered.

"Not without giving away where our home is. Our network was the only secure network I could contact home on at the time. If I used anyone else's tech, like Bishop's, it could be traced back. It was one of the first things I tried to do when I woke up. I tried to contact you but of course everything had been destroyed."

"Then your so called friendship with Bishop is bullshit"

"I wasn't friends with him until after I woke up." Donnie replied. "Before hand I was helping a potential ally however I didn't trust him fully until after I woke up."

Leo scoffed. "You could've found a way. You always tried everything until there was no other solution"

"And you're right, I know I should of but I was so overwhelmed! Look, I don't ever expect you to forgive me but I really did what I thought would be best at that moment. I just..." He covered his eyes again. "I woke up, not knowing what was going on. E-everyone was either dead or had changed and I had been sleeping! Father was dead. Casey was dead. You were blind. Mikey had a missing arm. Raph had been raped and his eye was missing and he was a raging alcoholic- I-... i-it was all my fault, I know it was and that will haunt me till the day I die!"

At the end of the tearful speech, Leo was facing the window, observing the soldiers and civilians working together. He spotted Mikey and Ted laughing as they played cards with other humans, something that he never thought it could become possible. True, they were still freaks but now they weren't feared; they had a place in society, their enemies were gone and things were already starting to look bright. Could that be a sign? Should he risk it all again and give himself another chance at happiness and forgiveness?

"Don, you left us and not even once you tried to contact us" Leo said. "But we were just as bad"

"I don't deserve forgiveness but... but can we just try to be at least friends? For Raph and Mikey's sake?"

Turning to the resident genius, Leo frowned. "Aren't you listening to what I said? We didn't do anything to try to find you. I mean, yes we did a couple of runs around the city but we gave up, we didn't try hard enough... _I_ didn't try hard enough!"

Don reached over and took Leo's hand in his own. "Well if it will make you feel better then I forgive you guys for not finding me."

Leo snatched his hand back and pushed past Don on his way out. Don was stunned when Leo reacting like that. "LEO! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to offend-!"

"How can you possibly say something like that?! Fuck, you're not 15 anymore and this isn't as simple as forgiving someone for a mean prank like hiding your tools or replacing your fucking coffee with tar!”

"I.. I don’t know what you want me to say…”

"... un-fucking-believable..." The former leader kept walking but Don kept following. 

"What?! What is it?! I've been honest with you! I've tried to support all of you as best I could! I push all of my problems to the side so I could get Raph and Mikey and even you the help you needed! What more can I do for you?! WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!"

"YOU THINK THIS CAN BE SOLVED WITH A BUNCH OF 'I'M SORRY'S' AND 'I FORGIVE YOU'S'?! GROW UP! JUST FUCKING GROW UP AND ACCEPT REALITY!"

"THEN TELL ME WHAT I CAN DO AND I'LL DO IT, LEONARDO! I WILL FUCKING DO IT!"

 Leo felt his coat being grabbed and he pushed Don away hard enough to make him fall onto the cold hard floor. "You can't pretend none of this didn't happen and you can't just make us feel better. Maybe Raph and Mikey can put it all behind but I can't, Donatello. _This_ is my burden to carry. It was my duty as your leader and brother to find you and I didn't; don't pretend a bunch of meaningless apologies will make me forget that"

 As the former leader walked away from him, Don watched him from his spot on the floor refusing to get up and accepting this as his punishment. But always the positive, he knew it would take a lot more effort to win Leonardo back.  

\----

 

It took a lot of rehearsing and picking the right words before Raph dared to face Ted again after their little incident a while back. Holding a small box in his hand, Raph smiled nervously and knocked on the medic's office door, knowing Mikey was due to visit in 10 minutes or so. Perfect timing.

"Just a sec, Mikester!" He heard the human call. "Alright get in here"

When Raph stepped in, the folder on Ted's hands fell the moment he realized who it was. "What are you doing here? I'm expecting your brother, not you"

"I wanted to apologize and I mean _really_ apologize. I was a dick, took advantage of your kindness and friendship and just wallowed in my own depression which I shouldn't have done. I'll understand if ya never wanna be friends again but.. just wanted ya to know that I'm sorry... so here." He pressed the small box into Ted's hand. "This is a wedding present for you and Angel."

“That's nice and all but you do realize this isn't going to solve things, right? I mean you are not a trustworthy patient, you started showing signs first with your alcoholism then with your suicidal tendencies- you couldn't keep your word with neither of them. How can I believe you from a medical perspective?"

Raph's bravery faulted. What did he expect? For Ted to forgive him. He should have known better than that. Taking a calming breath before he spoke, the turtle stared at his friend dead in the eyes. "Ted, I'm trying my best and if that's not good enough then-"

Ted raised a hand interrupting Raph's speech. "What you've been doing to yourself is horrible, Raphael, and nothing guarantees me you won't do it again... but I guess it'd be pretty dickish of me if I let this bump on the road fuck up years of keeping up with your sorry ass" He chuckled opening the box out of curiosity. "Holy shit! Ok who did you kill to get rings like these?!"

"I take it you like them then"

"Dude, Angel's gonna scream when he sees this!" Ted put the box in his pocket. "Bro... bro c'mere, you deserve this"

Raph chuckled and hugged Ted close. "I'm sorry I was such an ass, bro"

"It's ok. We're all asses at some point in our lives... but if you pull another stunt like that again, I swear-"

"You're gonna have to go through Leo first, just so ya know"

 

\----

 

"Thanks for coming, Leo. Angel didn't want to try anything on until you arrived" April said welcoming the ex-leader. "And I think she wants you to wear something too"

Angel poked her head out of a curtain. "Hey Leo." She smiled. "No, don't worry, I know you're not into tuxedos and honestly you'd look too old in one but I do have something I need you to wear for my wedding"

Leo smiled at her enthusiasm. "If it's a bow tie then I'm hiding the whole ceremony" 

"It's not _that_ , dork. Here, April helped me find the fabric. Not too sure about the color though but you'll pull it off"  

The leader grabbed the cloth thrown his way, barely missing his face and immediately knew what it was. In a darker shade of blue with tails much longer than the original, a mask rested now in his hands, the same mask he swore not to wear as a way to punish himself from dishonoring his clan. 

"Uh... guys... this-"

"We think it's time you stopped being the odd one out and... well... what a better way that bringing back the old color code again" Angel explained. "Honestly, that was the only way I could tell you guys apart"  
  
"It's not like we were _that_ similar" Leo argued lightly. "Anyway, I don't think I should have this. I appreciate the thought but I don't think I can wear this again"

"Leo we know how you feel about... well... getting the team together but it would mean so much to me... to everyone... if you tried" April said, grabbing one of the ends of the mask and caressing the soft material. "You don't have to be their leader if you don't want to. But they really need their big brother to be complete. And you need to forgive yourself for what happened"

Sighing heavily, Leo clutched the mask tightly not yet daring to even try it on. "April, Angel... I don't know if I can. I mean I should be happy we're alive and Donatello is back but at the same time I'm angry but not really at him. I think I still can't get past the fact that this could've all been solved if we just had talked as a family and helped Raph and Don with their problems... then again it was their relationship, we really didn't have a say on that"

"From what I understand, if Donnie hadn't gone off on his own he wouldn't have saved Bishop and Shredder would have gotten ahold of all of Bishop's tech and destroyed the planet and a lot of the galaxy so there was some good in it even if it doesn't seem like it" Angel said. "I'm not saying what he did was right but we all make mistakes. You could be a team again one day but first you have to learn to be bros again"

"How? My brothers, the turtles I grew up with are no longer the same!" Leo replied. "Raph needs drugs to keep himself sane, Mikey grew up and Don is basically a stranger now"

April squeezed his hand. "You need to think of it as a new kind of bond, not rebuilding the old one"

"It's not that easy, not with all the shit that's going on between us now"

Angel patted the ex-leader on the back a little harder than needed. "Yes perhaps your relationship status might complicate things but at least it's a start. Don't give up on them too fast and put on the damn mask already. We went through a lot of shit to steal the right fabric" 

"Oh I almost forgot!" April went back to retrieve a long black coat from her beaten up duffel bag. "Here. Take off that old thing, you won't be needing it anymore"

Reluctantly, Leonardo rid himself of the old trench coat he'd wore since day one of the tragedy that changed his life in order to wear the new one; this one was a lot more cleaner, navy blue instead of black and felt a lot more warmer on his busted up shell. "Thanks. As for the mask... give me some time to think about it? Maybe I'll mention it during our family therapy session"

"Alright but promise you'll wear at least once" April insisted before being interrupted by static coming from her walkie talkie. "This is Jones speaking from Bishop's base. What's the emergency. Over"

_"Hey Ape? Uh... It's Ted, I'm with Mike and he requested to see Leo after this session. Have you seen him around?... uh... over?"_

"Affirmative. He'll be there in a moment. Over and out" April looked at the leader, green eyes silently ordering him to carry on with Ted's request. "Baby steps, Leo. He's still your brother no matter what. He loves you and so do you"

With a nod and shoving the mask into his pocket, Leo turned heel towards the medic's office mulling over both women's words. Perhaps turning a new page wasn't a bad idea but what if he wasn't ready for it? What if he wasn't ready to forget?

 

 

 


	29. Chapter 29

As much as he told himself he was ready, Michelangelo couldn't help but be startled when his brother knocked on the door. If he wasn't so nervous he would've laughed at himself and his current situation. Here he was, a forty five years old grown ass turtle pissing his shell at the thought of facing his older brother, the same brother who'd chased away the imaginary monsters during their childhood, protected him with his life at all times and now he was the reason of his nightmares. Finally mustering the strength to speak up, Mikey sat down on bracing himself for what was about to come. 

When Leo opened the door he noticed right away he wasn't the only one scared out of his wits. "I can stay by the door if you want me to"

"No... no there's no need for that. Get in already"

"Of course" The door closed behind Leo with a soft click that somehow sounded louder for both of them. "How are you?"

"Better, I think. Ted and I had a very good session and there's something I need you to know before we meet up with the others" Mikey fidgeted becoming more nervous. "Sorry... this... I-I thought this would be easier"

"Take your time, I'm not going anywhere"  
  
Nodding, Mikey took a couple of calming breaths before addressing the former leader again. "Okay... so remember what you said about us just going back to being brothers? Well, I've been thinking and I really don't want that. We've crossed so many lines already and to be honest, I think we need this. We need to be together, all of us. And yes I am aware we have to heal- hell, it's been thirty years! But we didn't use to be like that, we used to love each other, we used to not be afraid of each other and... and now when I see you I can't help but wonder what will happen the next time I piss you off and it terrifies me that I can't look at you without seeing..."  
  
"A monster?" Leo finished for his brother, taking a seat at the end of the small battered couch in the room. "It's ok, I mean I wouldn't expect you to bounce back just like that. What I did was horrible and I know I harmed you deeply. It will take me some time but I promise you, Mikey, I promise you will be able to trust me again"  
  
"How... how will I know?"  
  
"I don't know but Angel and April said we had to take baby steps and that's what we will do. Starting with us. If what you wish is to continue with our relationship then we will work on it and I mean _really_ work on it. Not shortcuts, no excuses this time"  
  
"Is that what you truly want though? Do you want to heal as well?"  
  
Now it was time for Leo to be silent and think his answer although he'd already made up his mind. So many mistakes, so many bad calls in the last thirty years, so many people dead under his command... he didn't deserve any healing. He didn’t see himself free of sin in the nearest future, he wanted not to forget all the pain he'd caused but to live in penance as retribution for his crimes against his own family and eventually forgive himself in his deathbed or whenever his time came to reunite with his ancestors. If they would take him, of course. 

As if reading his mind, Mikey scooted closer to the troubled looking Leonardo. "Torturing yourself over what happened is a sucky way to heal, don't you think?"  
  
"Well you know _me_ , I'm a pro at this whole self hatred thing"  
  
"Oh really? I hadn't noticed"

"You were always pretty much deep in your own world" Leo smiled feeling the tension between them easing up a bit, giving him the final push he needed to go in for an overdue hug and when the gesture was returned, the former leader let out a weak chuckle. "Wow, when we became _this_ cheesy?"

"I think I like this cheesy Leo" Mikey replied, his hold on his brother tightening just slightly. "Not that emo Leo isn't nice in a mysterious kind of way? But cheesy is better. Like pizza"

"Dork" Leo mumbled, pulling back to stare into his brother's eyes and glad to find some of their lost light coming back. "That new arm of yours sure is strong"

"Needs some cool scarring though. Too bad we're almost done fighting for now" Mikey sighed, barely able to conceal his mirth.   
  
"You could get some ink on it. Have Angel do it or if you're looking for kanji, I can do it free of charge"  
  
Mikey grinned. "Free? No really, how much?"  
  
"If you insist, I could do with a kiss"

 

\----

 

They said old habits die hard and Raphael couldn’t agree more. As of late he found himself orbiting around Don, checking up on him whenever he wasn’t with Bishop, going with him on small rescue missions and even watching his estranged mate work from afar while he tinkered away in his makeshift lab. It really did feel like the good old days when everything was a little less chaotic and easier considering the circumstances they lived in.

“Hey brainiac, is it safe to come in or am I gonna lose the other eye?”

"Frankly Raph, leave the comedy to Mikey please? You can come in but be careful, I'm working with flammables"

"Good thing I ain't smoking then" Raph walked over avoiding seemingly looking equipment and strange substances kept away from curious hands. "So, what are you working on?"

"We're thinking on demolishing some old buildings with a new type of explosive. Non toxic and environment friendly but powerful enough to help clean up the debris and big chunks of rock and metal from the streets. Seeing as we don’t have much of the real deal, we have to make do”

"Yeah not that this isn't fascinating? But you better stop soon. I'm dragging you to Ted's bachelor party and I won't take no for an answer"

Don groaned, looking up from his notes. "Do I have to go? I don't know him that much, it'd be pretty awkward"

"You need to try and lighten up or you'll end up like Bishop" Raph said half jokingly. "You can come back to do your science project tomorrow after the massive hangover"

"Delightful" The genius turtle deadpanned, reluctantly putting away his notebook and turning off the Bunsen burners. "I have to take a bath and it might take me a while. I'd say two hour tops, think you can wait?"

With a nod Raph left Don's "sanctuary" and headed off to their shared bedroom shedding his clothes on the way there and not really giving a fuck who might trip on them; it would be their own damn fault for walking in turtle territory as they liked to call this section of Bishop's -not so secret anymore- hideout. Letting himself fall on the bed, Raph tugged on his mask slipping it off his face, leaving his eye patch on. Don didn't really need to see that gruesome, crudely stitched socket; his lover had seen his share of horrors in the past thirty years and Raph didn't see fit to add his disfigured face to the list. He didn't realize he'd dozed off until Don's steps as he came into the room startled him awake. With a fond smile he watched as Don picked up the last of Raph's discarded items with the patience of a saint and put them on the closet with his lab coats and winter clothing.

As for the genius turtle, he was so focused on this menial task to even noticed Raphael had woken up and observed him. he made a mental note to get him and his other brothers new clothes, new fabric for fresh masks, IDs, jobs... and that was just his brothers; there were still civilians that needed to be relocated, families that waited to be reunited with their loved ones, the amount of buildings they'd have to destroy and rebuild. It was just too much work- not that he was complaining- but it didn't help that all of things he had to fix his relationship with Leo was proving to be the hardest of all.

He came back to reality when his lover’s hand grabbed his own and pulled him into bed. "Hey… everything will be okay. Stop overthinking shit"

Sighing, Don rolled to his side to face his lover. “I know, I’m sorry. There’s so much to do though”

“And more than enough time and willing hands to help you with whatever you need. You’ve worked so hard, why not allow yourself a little break? It’ll be just like when we had our guys night out with Casey; bunch of stupid drunken idiots talking a lot of smack and maybe there’ll be boobs. Minus Leo, he's going to Angel's party" Raph quickly added as if reading Don's mind. "You're not gonna run into him or be forced to spend the night in the same room for now but this shit has to stop soon"

Don’s rebuttal changed course when he went back on Raph’s little speech. "Wait... what the hell is _he_ doing in bachelorette party?"

"Dunno, maybe he's the main attraction? I can't see Leo as a stripper honestly, not even with ten cans of beer in my system"

“I don’t know, maybe in an alternate reality... so you wanna go watch boobs, huh? Thirty years and you still think boobs are sexier than me?" Don asked, pretending to be offended.

Raph chuckled, pulling his mate closer. "Nah, I've got all the sexiness I need right here~”

"No no, go ahead. Watch all the boobs you want" Don replied, trying not to laugh. "I just have a nice ass but hey, _boobs_ amirite?"

"Pfft, even _you_ like boobs! Or do I have to remind you of that crush you had on April?"

" _Had,_ Raphael my dearest. Or maybe you want me to go back to that? I don't know, April's still looking good and she's single now so-"

"Oh yeah?" Raph shifted, leaning over Donnie posessively. “Not happening, dork. You’re mine~”

"Not thinking about boobs anymore, are you?"

"Nope, just your sweet sweet ass~"

"Is that _all_ you like about me? Now I feel like a manwhore"

“... you enjoy making things difficult for me, don't you?"

 

\----

 

In theory having a therapy session after a night of full on partying didn’t sound like a half assed idea to Mikey. Everyone would be relaxed, they scheduled it to be at a decent time so everyone could deal with their hangovers the best way possible and seeing as they’d all mingled and talked to each other for hours last night, spilling their feelings while sober would be a lot easier now. If only Leo had been there as well.

"You were awfully quiet last night" Don’s voice interrupted Mikey’s train of thought. “Is everything okay? Do you need an aspirin?”

"I was just enjoying the atmosphere." Mikey smiled a little. "You look wide awake considering you had the most fun though. Those girls couldn’t get their hands off you"

"Well I didn't exactly had a minute to enjoy after coming back from the death while I worked for Bishop so I say I deserved all that attention”

"And he drank enough for both of us" Raph added. "You should have seen him when we went back to our room. He couldn't stand straight and he was horny as fuck"

"Asshole..." Don muttered, blushing hard enough to make his brothers laugh.

"Hey maybe next time we can have a drinking contest with props?" Mikey suggested. “I’m totes game if you are, bros”

"You'll have to invite me then" Ted came in with April. "I'm taking pics and blackmailing the hell out of you two. So, we're just waiting on Leo?"

"I thought he'd be here already" April said, taking her seat. "I saw him at the cafeteria during breakfast"

"Maybe he is in here and he's just practicing his stealth skills" Ted said half jokingly. “We'll send people to look for him if he doesn’t show up in the next ten minutes. I don't want any of you to move, you need to be relaxed for this session to work properly"

“No need. I’m here” Leo announced as he joined the rest of the group sitting with April opposite to his brothers.

“Where the hell were ya, we’ve been flattening our fucking tails here waiting for you”

"Excuse _me_ for going to see my father, Raphael. You'd do the same if you weren't glued to your five stars hotel suite"

"We understand you needed to see your father, Leonardo.” Ted quickly intervened before things escalated. “That is something very important and no one will judge you for doing that but perhaps you could’ve gone earlier?"

"I did, I just... I lost track of time. I tend to do that nowadays”

"I haven't done that in ages" Don said, avoiding Leo's gaze. "... meditate  or visit father"

"Maybe we should all go together next time." Mikey suggested. "Perhaps bury some stuff that belonged to Shadow and Casey. I think Splinter wouldn't mind... right?"

Leo gave an agreeing nod. "He'd be happy to have them close by. They were his family too"

After a brief moment of silence, Ted stood from his seat clipboard in hand and started pacing. "Alright now that we’re all here we can begin with our session. I know there's still some non addressed issues between you all and that’s why we’re here. If we want to move forward we need to let the past go. Let's start with Donatello, shall we? You've done amazing things during your absence and you managed to gain the trust of two of your brothers but there's still people here that haven't quite accepted you just yet such as Leonardo and April. I understand you've been keeping your own amount of grudge against Donatello. Am I right, April?"

The grey haired woman nodded, huffing. "I must admit I had reservations about him being the real Donnie. But now... I dunno. He looks pretty real to me and I understand what happened but considering how much was lost I still feel a little resentful"

"April, I-" Don stopped talking when Ted raised his hand.

"Thank you April for sharing this with us. How did it make you feel when you found out he was alive?" Ted asked. "Don't hold back, we are all here to share, get rid of the old and start anew"

"Furious. I was so… so furious! I mean so many people died for no reason. Again, it’s _not_ Don's fault but when I look at him I'm reminded of the fact Casey and Shadow and so many others died and when that other Donnie showed up and was able to defeat Shredder so easily... I-I thought maybe so many other people could be with us now if _our_ Donnie had been here with us"

"Yeah but it wasn't his obligation to keep this whole world safe" Mikey replied.

"Yet you still had your share of hatred when you first saw him" Ted countered.

"Can’t blame a guy for being too cautious, can you? I may never comprehend what drove him to do what he did but I never stopped believing I would see him again. I forgave him the moment I saw the real deal even though my reactions didn't match my feelings at the moment"

"Yeah, pretty much how I was feeling too." Raph added. "I never knew how I would feel if Donnie came back. All I knew is that the moment I saw him again, I never wanted to let him go"

"Is that the partner in you talking?" Ted asked. "How about the turtle, the brother- what is _Raphael_ saying?"

"Same thing actually. I _was_ a little resentful at first but more for the way he was acting with how cold he was at first. Like one of those fucking robots"

"Long enough to learn to talk, act and just not come back home apparently" Came Leo’s snide remark.

Seeing how his lover visibly winced at that, Raph stretched his hand towards Don’s and held it tightly to give him the strength and support he was silently begging for. "Donnie, you’ve told us everything, haven't you? About what happened that day?"

Don fiddled his fingers nervously, looking at the floor. “... I wasn't in coma for that long. I woke up ten years after the accident and I have been watching over you ever since but Bishop didn't let me interfere. In fact, the day you 'died' I was there. I saw the other Don disappear, April taking care of you... finding out you weren't dead..."

"Wh- I’m sorry… what?"

"Shredder was still looking for me.! I-I... I had to hide but I made sure the resistance got weapons, food-"

"Now I know you're lying, my scouts found all of that on their own!" April replied.

"Who do you think gave the signals? It was the only way I could help without being discovered" Don continued. "You guys saw what he did with the blueprints he found in the lair, just imagine what he could've done with ME in his power!"

"But Stockman-"

"Stockman lied to save his neck. What was left of it at least"

"You're telling me we lost all the people we loved just because you had to hide?!" Leo asked rising from his seat abruptly.

"It wasn’t an easy decision to make, Leonardo! Every day I asked myself if I was doing the right thing, leaving you all alone. That wasn't the way father taught us but on the other hand I knew I was protecting you by not revealing myself!"

"If you could leave little fruit baskets here and there then might as well hand over a secret message or some sign and not keep us wondering what the hell happened to you!" Leo countered.

"Might have to agree with Leo on this one" Mikey agreed somewhat reluctantly. "Then again we would have tried to find him. I know I wouldn't have been content with just _knowing_ he was actually alive, I’d need to see it for myself too"

"It's exactly why I had to disappear! I know you guys, I knew what you'd try to do-"

"Apparently you didn't know us enough"

"Leo, please-"

"We were a _team_ , Donatello. _A team!_ If you had shown your face at least once-"

"And what Leo? Get himself captured and killed?" Raph countered. "If we'd known Donnie was alive back then we'd only end up ambushed by Shredder and him taken away- that to me is worse than thinking he was gone all those years!"

Sighing heavily, April spoke up again. "I hate choosing sides but… I guess I'm with Raph. Sooner or later word would've gone out and next thing we know, Shredder would've found Bishop's base and killed them all”

"Thanks April" Don muttered.

"Don't thank me yet, Don" The woman continued. "I lost my husband and my daughter because they knew you were alive. They weren't psychics, they must have seen you"

"But what if they didn't? What if it was pure gut instinct?" Mikey pointed out.

"They might’ve seen me once or twice. I wasn’t that stealthy when I was looking out for our surviving agents-"

April went pale. "-oh my god… Donatello, how could you!"

"I can't believe I agreed to this" Leo muttered and turned to the door.

Raph grabbed Leo's hand, spun him around and forced him down. "You're not going anywhere until we sort this shit out! I don't want this hanging in the air any longer! Not for Angel and Ted's wedding and not for us. Yes it fucking hurts to hear but we can't just blame Donnie for this. This is all Shredder's fault! If you’re looking for someone to blame, then blame that fucker! _He's_ the one who killed all our friends not Donnie!"

"... my baby... she told me and I didn't want to believe her" April mumbled, sinking to her knees.

Don knelt beside her. "April... if it's any consolation we're looking for her son, Edward. My team managed to find him before he was taken to the Foot labor camps"

"My... my Shadow had a baby?"

 Raph looked up. "The fuck?! She was pregnant? I LET HER LEAVE AND SHE WAS PREGNANT?!"

"No no Raph, she ... she found someone. They were trying to escape the city when her boyfriend got caught. He'll he back from one of Bishop's hideouts in Washington in a couple of weeks. I wanted it to be a surprise-"

“Well thank heavens for small favors, Donatello” 

“Leo cut that shit already!” Mikey snapped. "Just fucking hit him already and be done with your mopey act"

Ted continued writing down their progress during this session. "Is there something else you want to share, Donatello? No other secrets we need to be informed of?"

"No, that's all. I just hope you guys can understand now why things had to be like this. I didn't want to but we're together now, isn't that what matters?"

"... can we just pretend this is just a bad dream and focus on this last few weeks?" April said all of the sudden. "I don't want to forget Casey, Shadow or Splinter, that's a given but now Don's here and Shredder's gone I just want to focus on that. Focus on being a family again"

Ted turned to the only one who hadn't spoken yet. "Leonardo?"

Only when his name was mentioned again Leo reacted. It was Don this time. “You believed that people deserved a second chance, Leo. Doesn’t that apply to your own family?”

Chuckling humorlessly, the former leader shook his head. “I’ve lost so much going with that philosophy... I’ve been betrayed and hurt one too many times, how am I supposed to forgive you and start again like nothing’s happened? They were my family too, I saw that little girl grow until I was robbed of my sight. _We_ were there when you weren’t, you will never understand what it is to suffer like that, to… to lose the closest thing we’ll ever have to a little daughter!”

Feeling himself close to a breakdown, Leo took a last glance of his family before heading towards the exit. This time no one dared to stop him. “I can’t decide anything right now. I’m sorry guys”

The room fell into an uncomfortable silence; brothers looking at each other like strangers once more as old wounds seemed to want to reopen and get worse. Ted put down his notes and let himself fall heavily on one of the empty chairs. "Well I… uh… suppose we're done for now? We need another session as soon as possible but with the wedding coming up I’d say you’re off the hook for a couple of weeks more or less. Not ideal but can’t upset the missus"

Raph and Donnie were the first to leave with the former practically dragging his lover out of the room. After moments of silence that seemed to last an eternity they finally arrived to their shared room and Raph shut the door behind him, his forehead pressed to it, breathing quickening as the restraint he had kept on himself until began to fail him.

"So you never planned on tellin' me you'd been hidin' from me for twenty years?"

"Raph, no... it wasn't like that! I wanted to go back, I swear! I’d rather have you beating me up than letting you believe that"

The red masked warrior began to pace around the room, avoiding to even look at Don. He wanted to be angry, he wanted to ask for more explanations, he wanted to go back on his words and scream to Don’s face how much he’d hurt them but he had sided with his mate in the group therapy because deep inside he knew Don was right, he was  _ always _ right even when he wasn’t. Inside him was a whirlwind of emotions and he had no idea what to do with it. Meanwhile Don was experiencing his own mental breakdown, his heart breaking in tiny pieces seeing his mate go down a dark path again and all because of him. He was starting to believe it would've been best if he hadn't survived at all.

"Promise me something... never fucking leave again, kay? Never in what's left of our pathetic, sad lives"

Don shook his head. "Never! I swear... never ever. I'm here now, Raphie"

Stopping his pacing, Raph held his beloved tightly. "I love you"

“I love you too, I never stopped loving you Raphael… I-I missed you so much and I felt so stupid for leaving things the way I did. I-”  Don was cut off with a fervent kiss that gradually led then to more touching and groping, slowly making their way to the bed with the genius looking down at his beloved rebel lover. 

“You wanna make it up to me?” Raph asked huskily, parting his legs to let his lover rest between then much to Don’s surprise. 

“Raph... but I thought... I mean after what happened-”  
  
“Please… don’t think Don. For once in your life, don't think. Just do” 

  

 


	30. Chapter 30

Compared to three months ago, half the city was looking pretty much ready for a clean start. There were still broken vehicles on the streets and buildings that needed to be demolished but with Shredder and the Foot gone people were more willing to try and work with what they had. The utrom and triceraton units provided some places with power sources replacing regular electricity until the main towers could be repaired and some small business and homes had light now. Along the way, the brothers could see some civilians scavenging and a few sketchy looking groups of people trading weapons but there wasn’t any time to deal with that at the moment. Tensions were still high with the arrival of extraterrestrial forces so general paranoia was understandable despite Bishop’s intervention. All and all it was a slightly changed New York but that didn't stop crime or in this case, a lone ninja fighting against the system.

Walking side by side in one of their daily patrols were Mikey and Don, combing the city just like Leo, Raph and their respective teams. Their goal? Find Mihara Satoshi, the last Foot clan soldier alive. "Gotta admit I wasn’t that hopeful before but the city is looking so much better"

"There's still lots to do. We still get reports of raids and small gangs but I think that's always gonna be a problem. If we find Satoshi though we won't risk another recruit movement"

“Highly doubt that’s gonna happen again. With the big heads out of the picture, small wannabe gangs aren’t gonna be that organized” Mikey replied. “It doesn't feel like before, they’re slipping, seeking food and shelter rather than fight against those who’re offering an easy way out of the streets”

"I can't believe you had to put up with that for so long" Don said.

"Eh we managed. We always have, even back then when we had the team and… and dad. Remember? True things weren’t as shitty but we came out mostly unscathed”

“Right. Still, you guys kept yourselves pretty much sane compared to the rest of the world. Kudos to you”

Snorting, Mikey kicked away a very old soda can, crushed beyond recognition asking himself mentally when was the last time he held one of those to his lips, downing the cold and sugary contents without a care in the world. "So... how's finding Shadow's son coming along?" He asked suddenly.

"He's fine, he's in Washington with a group of technicians. Apparently Shredder valued brilliant and capable workers and Eddie just happened to be one of the few gifted"

"Is there many people in Washington?  What about the other states or worldwide?" Mikey said

"Remember those documentaries that showed people with 'end of the world' shelters and bunkers? Well, that's how many citizens survived" Don said. "And not only in Washington, all over the country there are bunkers and heavily guarded refuges. We contacted them and kept most survivors below ground. Shredder was too busy trying to build his empire above he didn't care looking under his feet. He was going to expand eventually but lucky for us that other Don came. Speaking of him, what was he like?"

Mikey shrugged, turning a corner before his brother. Always vigilant, always ready for something to happen and sadly that was just how things were and would be for a long time. "There was no real difference. We thought you just stepped through a time portal or something"

"I know that last part but there had to be something, even the slightest difference... no?"

"Well, he seemed surprised that Raph hugged him. Maybe his Raph isn't the affectionate kind or in their world... dimension, whatever. Maybe they're not an item like you and our Raph"

"And how did you feel when you saw him?"

"Shocked at first, then when I started talking to him and realized he didn't know anything I had to calm down a bit. He was just a kid that got separated from his family because of some freak accident. He didn't say more and we didn't pry" Mikey smiled a little. "He was so short though... unlike you, daddy long legs"

"Duh, a fifteen year old me _had_ to be short, genius" Don jumped back when a wall crumbled before him. "This place is literally falling apart. Remind me to send demolition units here"

“You know we could do this even faster with some TNT, sprinkle some C-4 here and there… yeah it would look pretty. What do you say?”

"I-" Don started then suddenly pushed Mikey to the side and blocked a sword with his reinforced staff. "I'm guessing you're the one we've been looking for?"

The disheveled looking man bared his yellow teeth at the surprised turtles. The deep frown he sported made him look older and tired; clothes torn, loose and cheekbones protruding from his face spoke out loud of just how long he’d fallen from grace and even in his weakened state, barely able to lift his blade, there was fury and fire in his sunken eyes.

"Mihara Satoshi, you're coming with us. You are to be judged by crimes committed while you worked under Shredder's dictatorship" Don declared, not impressed in the slightest by the tired warrior.

"I'd rather die fighting!" Satoshi argued, lifting his blade once more.

"That can be arranged" Mikey grinned, rushing past his brother to hit the man with all the force he could utter. It would be satisfying if he could hear at least a few ribs break under his mighty nunchucks. The orange masked ninja nearly laughed with every blow delivered; his newly attached arm burned with the strenuous movements and he loved every second of it. It made him feel alive, capable. _Complete._

"Mikey, we have orders to bring him back alive!" Don called out to his sibling, his words falling on deaf ears. The once carefree turtle was out for blood, Don could sense it, _feel_ it somehow.

Cornered and bladeless, Satoshi found it impossible to fight back against the rapid nunchucks and the blows that fell on his already broken body left him breathless and on the rubble covered street, curled into a ball covering his head. Don had only seconds to intervene before Mikey could do more damage, catching his brother’s wrists midair in a tight grip.

“Mikey, stop it! He’s down already!”

“I’ll decide when he’s down or not”  
  
Changing his hold quickly from wrists to shoulders Don turned his sibling around swiftly, shaking him. “Michelangelo, you will stop this nonsense this instant! That’s an _order_!”

Breathing heavily, both turtles glared at each other for a moment. The tension could be cut with a knife, something that hadn't happened as of late and after months of therapy. Only when Don deemed his brother calm enough he let go, looking at the unconscious ninja behind Mikey with a certain amount of pity.

"Calling all units, we got our prisoner" Mikey announced on his walkie talkie. “I repeat, we got our prisoner. Regroup and return to base at once, I repeat, return to base”

“It’s a miracle he’s not dead. Man what were you thinking? We can’t just kill on sight, not anymore-”

"I tried to be sympathetic at first, Donatello. Sparing them always ended up being a mistake! The old Mikey’s philosophy doesn't work with shitheads like Satoshi. You just... you wouldn't understand"

"We'll talk about that later. For now let's get back to-" Words died in Don's mouth when he saw the glistening knife on the supposedly unconscious ninja's hand. He grabbed Satoshi by his clothes though not before the fallen ninja nicked Mikey's bicep with the knife before he was pinned on the ground by a furious Donatello.

"Mikey, the cuffs!" But his brother wasn’t moving. He was staring at the cut in shock and almost ready to blackout. To his luck, a group of soldiers patrolling the area noticed Don struggling and met up with him, pinning Satoshi down and cuffing him.

Don pocketed whatever leftover weapons the ninja carried before he gave the order to take him to the base. "By the time the judges are done reading your case you'll be begging to die”

Satoshi's smirk grew. "It's worth it to see your brother's face right now"

"I'm... I'm b-bleeding..." Mikey whispered, getting Don’s attention again. "Is... i-is it still there? I can't feel my arm, Don! I can’t… my arm Donnie, is it okay?!"

Don's grip around Mikey's new arm tightened, forcing the nervous turtle to look down at his limb. He wiggled his fingers, closed and opened his hand several times and his breathing began to calm. "It's… still attached?"

"Yes, it's still there. It's not going to fall off or anything. C'mon, keep it together, I need you to stay with me till we get to the infirmary okay? Can you do that for me?"

"Okay... okay. I can do this"

They were welcomed with praise and smiling faces from survivors and soldiers but Don couldn't enjoy it fully; seeing his brother in such distress was worrying considering he'd already passed all of Ted's exams. That thirst for blood, his eagerness to kill and the anxiety that came with the possibility of losing his new arm could threaten their newfound balance which meant there was still tons of work to do with Michelangelo in particular. Said brother made a beeline to the infirmary holding his injured arm for dear life until he plopped himself down on the cot. He tensed up briefly when the door noticed and Don came into the room. No words were exchanged between then as he carried on with the standard procedure, making sure Mikey could see the tools he’d be using.

“Remember which one of you was my first patient?” Don asked breaking the silence. “It was Leo, scraped knee. We were 8"

"Really? You sure it wasn’t me or Raph?"

"Leo made everyone believe it was you. He had a reputation to keep” Don grabbed more clean gauze and added more alcohol to it. "He was crying like a baby, thought he was going to die"

"You know Raph once told me that I’d die if I scraped my knee. He must’ve overheard him” Mikey said with a half smile at the fond memory.

"Needle's going in now" Don warned, waiting until Mikey gave a single nod of approval. "Anyway, then I got my first severe case when I was 14. That was Raph, I think? But that time was a sprained ankle"

"Was he a big baby about it too?"

"No but he tried to play it cool and refused to take painkillers"

“Of course he did” Mikey chuckled.

Don finished closing the wound and started bandaging it. "I didn't get to see how you lost your arm. Can't even imagine the pain”

"Karai bot. It was a Karai bot" Mikey said. "April practically had to drag me back to the sewers."

Don nodded, securing the bandage. "There. It should be good now”

"I'm gonna go back to my room. Maybe take a nap or something"

“Wait! Mike, what happened today, I… I really should've considered you weren't ready. I mean, you've had that arm for so little time-"

"I wouldn't have wanted you to go on your own” Mikey said shrugging off Don’s concern. “I know you are probably used to being on your own by now"

"Still, we should've waited"

Shaking his head, Mikey slid off the cot. “Can't wait in this new world, dude. It's do or die"

Once again Don was interrupted with the arrival of a soldier, one from Bishop’s personal reserve. "Mr. Hamato? Agent Bishop requires your presence during the trial"

"I'll be there in five!” Don dismissed the woman, closing the door on her face. “Mikey, promise me we’ll talk about this later. I don't want you to keep anything in, not again. It’s not-”  
  
“-healthy, I know!” Mikey added quickly. “Ted said it before, you keep saying it, geez Don I am _not_ a child!”

“Yeah… yeah you’re not. You’ve changed, _we’ve_ changed but no matter how mature you think you are, you’re still my little brother Mike and it’s still my job to look after you. I know I haven’t done a good job but-”

A heavy sigh left the orange masked turtle, hands resting over his sibling’s shoulders. “Donnie, it’s okay. I’m okay, I shouldn't have lost my cool back there and yes I still have issues but I’m trying, I’m really trying. And you haven’t done a bad job, nobody thinks so. Go to your meeting now, make sure they give me an extra muffin at lunch today and we’ll call it even. Sounds good?”

Don nodded, smiling when his brother did. “Kay… extra muffin, got it. Make sure you keep your phone near you, I might call you if something happens”

“Bro… something _always_ happens here” And they both knew truer words had never been spoken.

 

\---- 

 

One would think that once the city began the process of rebuilding they wouldn’t need to use a war room and yet here he was, sitting in an uncomfortable ass chair, reading some old book to pass the time until one by one his brothers arrived so the meeting could start; at least this time Leo could do something productive rather than having to twiddle his thumbs and count the steps people took outside and around him with his eyes destroyed and all. Not anymore though thanks to the Utrom doctors, their technology and Donatello.

_‘Donatello…’_ Leo thought, stopping on a particularly boring paragraph. Three months later and he couldn’t quite enjoy his brother’s presence as much as he wanted, his name alone being mentioned in conversation would drive him to a mental debate with himself turning the rest of his day sour.

That forgiveness that came so easily to him in his younger years was gone now, too many betrayals he said but then again Don had been nothing but honest all that time and everyone saw how eager he was to make it up to his family, to Leo in particular. Why couldn’t he meet him halfway? Why couldn’t he let go of that grudge? And why was it so hard to look at his brother in the eyes and say _I forgive you_?

"Ugh… fucking dammit, new eye's still giving me a fucking headache!"

Leo perked up when Raph entered the room, his book completely forgotten. "Don't touch it, you know what the doctor said"

“Doctors can kiss my ass for all I care. It’s my new eye and I’ll scratch it whenever I fucking want” Raph grunted, taking a seat just as Mikey entered the room. “The hell are we doing here again?”

“Bishop thought we should discuss what to do with Satoshi” Mikey said. “Basically he’s making us do his dirty work again because as the future new president, he doesn’t want his voters to think he’s some one sided tyrant”

Leo snorted. “President? He’s getting ahead of himself. No one’s gonna proclaim him the Earth’s savior just like that”

“President Bishop… fuck that sounds weird. Why not President April Jones? If anyone should be in charge of this motherfucking country it _should_ be her” Raph chuckled, fishing for a cigarette in his jacket when the last brother arrived.

"Sorry I'm late!" Donnie said, coming in with armfuls of paperwork. "I'll have to get straight to the point. Bishop has asked for your opinions of what we should do with the Foot Ninja we've captured"

“Told you” Mikey quipped.

Even though the bad blood between the ex-leader and the genius turtle was apparently gone, Leo still kept his distance from Don so it took him by surprise to see the files being delivered to him.

“Alright, here’s what we know: he belonged to Saki’s inner circle, was appointed leader of the north labor camps after his superior was killed by a rebel group non associated with April’s”

“Must’ve been one of Angel’s platoons” Raoh commented.

“Along with Tanaka Haru, he orchestrated the mayor’s assassination and he’s one of the six responsible soldiers for the fall of the Pentagon. _Literally._ Blew the whole thing up”

“Bishop wants to look good as always so I’m assuming killing Satoshi is off limits?” Mikey stated earning a nod from the brainiac. “Terrific…”

“Killing him would be want he wants anyway, he’d be a martyr to the prisoners we have so far and the small groups still out there” Leo said. "Let's lock him in jail forever or better yet, arrange something with the Utrom council and judge him using their system. We all know how that ends”

"Hey if we can’t kill him, how about we maim him? Let's see how he likes to lose an arm, both of them better yet" Mikey added. "Cut his hands and feet off. Then he'd find it harder to escape"

Donnie looked between all of them, having noted down everything they said. "I think we should go with Leo’s idea and talk to the Utroms. There’s no way he can weasel out of their sentence that easily"

“Right but can’t we hurt him just a lil bit before you lock him up?”

“No can do, Raph. Besides Mikey broke a few of his bones already and Bishop it’s not happy about it”

“Well tough shit, he’s not my dad and Satoshi deserved it specially if you're gonna send him off to freeze in space where I can’t hurt him even more. Just look at those numbers, look at all the people he helped kill! He should be glad you were there to defend his ass”

“Wait what exactly happened? Why is Mikey all bitchy about?” Raph asked.

“Nothing. Me and Mike had a… slight disagreement when we found Satoshi, that’s all. We got distracted for a moment and he got a cut on his arm” Don explained as calmly as possible.

Immediately the older brothers understood the reason behind Michelangelo’s ire. “Aw Mikey-”

“Raph don't start. I’m fine, Donnie treated it and I had some time to calm down”

“Wasn’t enough apparently. I can see smoke coming from your ears, lil’ man”

“Don’t call me that”

"Speaking of smoke, I think I know what you need to calm your nerves" Raph said, taking Mikey’s arm forcing him to stand. “Donnie, you don't need us anymore right?”

“Uh… no? Not for now, I guess if you all agree-”

“Awesome. Later ladies, we’re gonna be outside. Wouldn’t wanna stink up the place with fine tobacco” Raph grinned, leaving the room with a slightly more compliant Mikey.

A knowing smile crossed Leo’s features;  they both knew Mikey wouldn’t turn down an invitation like that. “Have fun you two. Don't get shot”

With both his siblings gone, Don didn’t see the point of prolonging his stay; the faster he left that suffocating room the better and it would seem he wasn’t the only one trying to run away and avoid direct confrontation. Leonardo was already heading to the door, a tattered book under his arm he probably intended to continue reading elsewhere. He stopped organizing the loose notes, mentally chastising himself for this pathetic display. He wasn’t a coward, goddammit and Leonardo wasn’t some monster that would swallow him whole at the first chance given.

“Well at least Bishop won't complain more than usual”

Startled, Don fumbled with the folder in his hands. “You’re… talking to me?”

“Do you see anyone else in this room?”

“Right… I’m uh… I-”

Alright so that might’ve come out harsher than what he intended it to be. Going back on his steps, Leo grabbed the rest of the report and arranged it neatly before handing it back to his flabbergasted brother. "I'll walk you to the office"

“Oh that’s okay, you don’t have to”

“But I want to” Leo replied, opening the door. “Go on, I won't bite”

Not wanting to pass on an opportunity like this, Don hurried outside walking alongside the former leader and making small talk which was gladly reciprocated. Before they knew it they were walking back to Don’s place with the intention of preparing dinner together.

“How have you been? Are your eyes okay? You’ve been checking in with the doctors like they told you to?”

“They won’t let me skip an appointment. It’s almost like having a small army of worried Donatello’s minus the coffee breath” Leo joked, chopping some vegetables. "This place is nice, very clean and cozy"

“It used to be bigger but you know how Raph is with his stuff. I didn’t know you cooked now, Mikey taught you at last?”

“More or less. At first I had to rely on cooking books and memory which was very useful after I lost my sight. Then it was just a matter of taste and smell testing to make sure I wasn’t going to poison myself”

Don nodded, checking the oven’s temperature. “Remarkable skill, you should be proud of yourself. I doubt I would’ve lasted that long”

“You would’ve never let yourself get maimed like that, you’re the brain remember?”

“Yeah but that hasn’t stopped me from making terrible decisions”

Pouring the chopped ingredients into a bowl, Leo looked up at his brother. “True but you had your reasons”

“So you say yet you still avoid me” Don countered. “In fact, today is the only day we’ve talked this long and now you’re here. Don’t get me wrong I’m happy this is happening but why now? It’s been three months Leo; you’re not… you’re not planning to leave or something, right?”

Leo turned off the tap, drying his hands on his coat. “You said it yourself, it’s been three months. Enough time to think and clear my mind, balance the cons and pros and honestly I’ve been a dick. Call it residual PTSD or something but enough is enough and here we are. Raph and Mikey had their chance already, it’s just fair that _we_ give ourselves one as well”

Straight to the point, without tears or heartfelt meaningful speeches, that’s how the new Leonardo did things and to Donatello this was enough. Beggars can’t be choosers, not in this new world just trying to emerge from the ashes, rubble and death. They exchanged a quick smile and continued working on their dinner, a classic for the Hamato brothers: pizza with everything but the kitchen sink.

“Have you worked out what you'll be doing next with your life?" Don asked between bites of the steaming slice in his hand.

“Maybe I'll open a dojo. Sensei told me Master Yoshi wanted to teach ninjutsu once he arrived to New York and now that humans know of our existence I feel like that dream will become a reality” Leo said fondly. “What about you?”

“I have a position in Mortu’s labs once they start running here on Earth and April wants to join in. For now I’m just Bishop’s right hand”

“That will never stop sounding weird” Leo chuckled, grabbing another slice. “I think Raph is interested in joining the new army or the police forces, something about not getting rusty?”

Don grinned. “He just wants to punch the most people possible before he becomes senile”

“Who you calling senile, babe?” Raph called, closing the door behind him. “Whoa I recognize that smell~”

“Ditto~ Can’t remember the last time I had a frankenpizza” Mikey said, joining his siblings in the kitchen. “Sup Leo”

“Hey, you guys good? Had your fill of lung cancer?”

“Har di har har. Leave the jokes to me dude and hand me a slice, please”

Just as Raph was about to help himself, Don slapped his hand. “Wash those and grab a plate. We’re not uncivilized”

“Yes _mom_ ”

"So are we having a movie night?" Mikey asked. "We can’t have frankenpizza without a movie"

“Yeah except there hasn’t been a movie in ages” Raph said gruffly.

Without a word Don left the table and headed to the living room and a few moments later they could hear the TV on and loud and the voices of actors long gone. He returned holding the remote smiling at his accomplishment. “Did someone say movie night?”

The surprised brothers all stared at Don dumbfounded before rushing past him, fighting for the best seat. It would seem that some things never changed.

\----

 

"Easy on the olives, Don" Leo said. "You know Mikey gets mad if she doesn't get any"

"Leo, he's a grown ass turtle" Raph said. "Let him deal with a pissed off Mikey once in a while"

Donnie giggled as he ate another olive. "Sorry, I just love them so much!"

The group laughed at each other’s antics watching people dancing and mingling, recognizing some old friends and people they helped along the way looking healthier and hopeful again. Parties were still a luxury nowadays but they could make an exception like today for example, the day Ted and Angel returned from a successful mission in Washington. The guests of honor spotted the brothers all together in a single table and came to greet them. 

"Well, look at you guys! I knew we were going to see results sooner or later” Ted grinned, patting Raph’s shell. “Did you guys miss me?”

“Sure… like I miss a headache. You sellouts gonna work for Bishop now?”

“Hey the man is technically running the world now, we’re just gonna be there to keep the power from getting to his head too fast” Angel said. 

“Speaking of that, we have a meeting first thing tomorrow so try to stay sober” Don added. 

The couple shared a quick look, faces brightening up. Mikey quickly picked up on that, nearly jumping off his seat. “You’re  _ pregnant _ ! You so are, holy shit!”

“Is it true? Are you pregnant?” Leo asked. 

Angel nodded, her cheeks bright red. “Found out a month ago and we’re rooting for a boy”

“Good job man” Raph smiled at the equally red faced Ted. “Get ready for the midnight yelling and the never ending pooping”

“I think after years of dealing with you big babies we’re more than ready for one of our own” Ted grinned. “Right Angelcakes?”

“Don't call me that in front of the guys!”

“Congratulations guys, really. You both deserve this” Don smiled at then, shaking hands with Ted.

“Thanks Donnie, we’re gonna head to bed now. Wouldn’t want to be late to our first official meeting. Later guys!”

Leo smiled fondly at the couple walking away hand in hand, a sudden rush of emotions taking over his whole being making him misty eyed. That could’ve been Shadow and whoever she took to be her partner, they could’ve grown together with Angel as her big sister but not everything could be perfect in their new lives. Her loss still hurt but with time and the arrival of a new baby perhaps he would heal completely. 

At the end of the ballroom he spotted April standing by a window looking out at the city. "You guys wait here, I'll be right back" 

Seeing Leo approach, the grey haired woman smiled. "Hey you"

"Hey you” He parroted goodnaturedly. “Are you doing ok?"

"Happy events make me miss Shadow and Casey even more. But tomorrow my grandson will be here. I can't wait to meet him. How do you think he'll be like?"

"Probably just like his boneheaded mother and grandfather." Leo chuckled. "He must be really excited to finally meet you" 

"Yeah, I think he's also glad to find out he has someone. I know I am now that I’ll have a little bit of my baby girl with me”

Leo nodded, surprising the woman seconds later with a hug. "I'm sorry… I’m so sorry April. We promised to be your family, take care of you... and we didn't.  _ I  _ didn't"

"Oh Leo… sweetheart you _ did _ take care of me and you never stopped being my family, there’s really nothing to forgive” April said hugging him back tightly. “Appreciate what we have, not what we don't or what could have been"

"Heh funny… that's something father would say"

"Then we know it’s good advice. I'll raise Eddie as best I can now. Teach him how to defend himself and love him so very much"

"You'll be a good mentor. I mean, you were kinda like our mom and we ended up well… sorta”

"I think your brothers want you back at their table” She said nodding at the group of giddy turtles. Parting away from her turtle brother, she smiled at him warmly. “Go and have a good time with them. The party's winding down anyway"

As he walked back to his family, Leo could hear laughter from other tables, smiles on people's faces and his brothers. If someone would've asked him if he'd be willing to share a table with them a few months ago he'd have to think twice before doing such thing but now, now he didn't want this to be a one time thing. He wouldn’t part from their company ever again. 

Finally he felt like everything was right in the world and although all of their relationships were different now, they were finally a family once more.

 

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it. Finally done. Thank you for the nomination and for taking your time reading this RP turned fic. 
> 
> Life has been getting tougher and I can't make any promises but perhaps I can take this as a starting point to finish all those stories I left forgotten.


End file.
